• Please go to your preferences page and make sure your "See Mature Topics" setting is set. Setting it to "Yes" means you see the Mature Topics forum (contains political and religious debates). Setting it to "No" means you do not see those threads.

Super Bowl XLIII

Status
Not open for further replies.

EvaIlyxtra

Est. Contributor
Messages
3,055
Role
Adult Baby, Diaper Lover, Sissy, Other, Private
It is that time of tha year again. One of my favorite days of tha year, tha super bowl! This year it involves two very distinguishing teams: the Pittsburgh Steelers (afc champs) and the Arizona Cardinals (NFC champs). Here is a bit more info about these teams.

Pittsburgh Steelers: the steelers have been in existance since 1933 but had been a dormant team until the early 70s when a powerful offense and a stellar defense know as the Steel Curtain. In this time period, the steelers won 4 Super Bowls in 6 years (1974,75,78,79) and got one for the thumb in 2005. The steelers are greately known for their powerful defense which has been it's strength for the past 40 years. In 2009, they wish to accomplish a super bowl feat and win one for the other thumb.

Arizona Cardinals: Established in 1898 as an amateur football club, the cardinals are the oldest running pro football team in the NFL. Yet with that, the cardinals hold the second-longest championship drought in north American sports (Chicago cubs longest). The cardinals reach their first championship game in 60 years with a powerful offense and suprising defense. This time around, they want to show the league who we thought they were!

This is a great matchup, but who will win the forty-third Lombardi trophy?

I choose the underdog Cardinals to surprise tha world in a great matchup.
 

Dawes

Est. Contributor
Messages
1,805
Role
Diaper Lover
I'll just cut and paste my predictions from my blog. These are my detailed predictions for the game! Sorry for the long read. It's also very opinionated -- Steelers fans, I'm sorry if you hate me!
________________________________
How could I be any less excited — the Pittsburgh Steelers going against the Arizona Cardinals. It’s like putting a piece of paper on a table, asking another piece of paper to sit next to it, and recording it with a camcorder. No matter what you do, it’s going to suck, and you’re going to regret having wasted your time watching such crap.

While you may think that I’m bitter because my Ravens did not manage to squeeze their way into the Superbowl (guys, you had a great run — Flacco is an outstanding new talent, Harbaugh is what we needed in a coach, and Ray, if you go to fucking Dallas, I will skin you alive and eat the pieces), I’m actually not. I was very proud of them for going as far as they did, and I know in my heart that Flacco should have been crowned Rookie of the Year, and Ed Reed should have gotten Defensive MVP of the year. With that said, let’s move onto the real deal: The Superbowl; the great matchup; the be-all-end-all of the sports year …

… and this year, the most boring sixty minutes of sports you could ever imagine.

First of all, the Steelers are bullshitters. How can you fuck up black and gold? Maybe I’m just predispositioned to hate them because I’m a Ravens fan — or maybe, just maybe, their team is full of shit-eaters and goblin-blowers. Either way, the Steelers are stupid, and what I wouldn’t give to wath Rottshinblinger get power-bombed at half-time on the stage so The Boss could boss him up the pooper while crashing a motorcycle. That would be hardcore.

Then, we go onto the Arizona Cardinals. You know, because there’s so many important and wonderful things to say about them.

Only … I think I forgot them, because it’s the Arizona Cardinals, so, truthfully, who really gives a rat’s ass? Anyway, let’s get on to the real point in this post — it’s time to share my predictions.

Final score for this year’s Superboring Superbowel — 21 - 17, Arizona over Pittsburgh.

People are predicting that the Steelers are going to manhandle Arizona, but more surprising things have happened than the notion of Arizona coming from beneath and rocking the shit out of the opposition, right? While I’m not the most educated football fan, I do actually have reasons behind these number predictions.

First of all, let’s start with the quarterbacks. Kurt Warner, according to ESPN’s 2008 statistics, is the third-highest rated passing quarterback with a rating of 96.9 in the whole NFL. That’s pretty fucking solid. I would attribute this to Warner’s experience and his confidence — the man has been playing serious ball for some time, and his arm is a machine. He throws when he knows he can throw and when he knows he can connect. If he manages to connect with Fitzgerald for some long-ass passes the way he did during the NFC Championship, the Cardinals are going to be going for some very deep plays to heavy the points on their side of the board. Comparatively, Ben Shittenslipper has a rating of just 80.1. While that’s not something scoff at, he’s considerably far down the list, even ranking beneath newcomers Joe Flacco (80.3) and the Falcons’ Matt Ryan (87.7). If the numbers tell the tale, then there’s no contest — Kurt Warner is going to ram a dick-shaped football so far up Blunderbutter’s ass that even Todd Heap (Top Gear), who loves dick-shaped footballs landing in his mouth, won’t want to go spelunking after it.

Let’s step away from the quarterbacks for a few minutes, though, and focus on the offenses overall. Passes from the Pittsburgh end will likely be less for distance and more for completion — Pumplinsmearer will probably shoot out a lot of his famous screen passes and let his receiver’s feet do the talking. With Willie Parker back in and carrying the ball, they might even be able to get in a few solid rushes and punch in a teedee or two on the ground. They’re going to need to rely on their ground game to slam Arizona’s defense, because there’s still question as to whether or not Hines Ward (who got his knee rocked straight into his rectum against the Ravens) will be playing to bolster the Pittsburgh offense. Again, my summary of Arizona is that, between Boldin (who should still be playing, if my reading is correct) and Fitzgerald, Warner is going to have plenty of room to make some beautiful passes as long as his receivers can make themselves clear. It’s going to be a battle of offenses, with the Arizona air-game trying to go overcome what I assume will be Pittsburgh’s run-heavy game.

In the end, it’s supposedly defenses that win games. Arizona’s defense does not necessarily seem to shine, but it’s a team that in the late regulation season and in post-season has been reliant upon its crazy offense, and they’ll be utilizing that against Pittsburgh’s “steel curtain” (that’s a pretty gay term, isn’t it?). Pittsburgh’s defense is — for as much as I hate to admit it — a weapon of mass destruction (although Polamalu is not a safety of any skill comparable to Ed Reed — it’s all in the numbers), and Arizona will really need to move to avoid them.

So, to summarize, here’s what I’m seeing: I’m seeing that Pittsburgh, as good a team as they are, is not one that puts up reliable touchdown points — they just keep the points from stacking up against them. They let their defense carry them through a came and kick cushion field-goals to ensure a lead. If Arizona, however, brings a rested Warner and some ready receivers, they could easily outrun the defense and drop in some beautiful long-play touchdowns (without interceptions, if all goes as planned). Arizona will be putting up high points, and Pittsburgh, while they’ll move the ball, won’t be able to rack up nearly as many points against their underdog opponents.

So, again, I’m predicting 21-17 Arizona. Let’s see just how that goes. I’ll hold my breath and hope that Arizona can win their first title and put the arrogant Steelers back into their hole for another year.

Now it’s time to relinquish my penis, remember I have a vagina, and forget that I love football with all of my heart and tits.

Go Cards!
 
Last edited:

LittleAdam

Est. Contributor
Messages
620
Role
Adult Baby, Incontinent
Arizona Cardinals: Established in 1898 as an amateur football club, the cardinals are the oldest running pro football team in the NFL. Yet with that, the cardinals hold the second-longest championship drought in north American sports (Chicago cubs longest). The cardinals reach their first championship game in 60 years with a powerful offense and suprising defense. This time around, they want to show the league who we thought they were!
Cardinals. And as far as that Cubs comment, that drought will end this year too.
 

babyemo

Est. Contributor
Messages
772
Role
Adult Baby, Diaper Lover,
HOLY SHIT, i dont think i get that deep into anything!
 

Altric

Est. Contributor
Messages
520
Role
Adult Baby, Diaper Lover, Babyfur
I am not going to watch the superbowl, nor have I ever watched it. Last year, I watched the Mythbusters marathon on Discovery. This year I'll probably end up switching back-and-forth between The Sopranos marathon on A&E and the CSI marathon on Spike.
 
Messages
414
Role
Private
The super bowl? I love baseball!
I am not going to watch the superbowl, nor have I ever watched it. Last year, I watched the Mythbusters marathon on Discovery. This year I'll probably end up switching back-and-forth between The Sopranos marathon on A&E and the CSI marathon on Spike.
:eek:FREAKS!!!!
but seriously if you aren't gonna watch it the why post in this thread?:dunno:
 

Point

Est. Contributor
Messages
3,349
Role
Diaper Lover, Little
Posting in this thread to annoy Eric.

I never watch the Super Bowl. Waste of time, watching football, if you ask me `-`
 

dogboy

Est. Contributor
Messages
21,125
Role
Adult Baby, Diaper Lover
I wonder if you lose that manly edge by watching the Super Bowl diapered? I mean, I'll be watching and rooting for the Steelers, sorry Rance, and when Rothlesburger throws some long bomb, I'll be running toward my set like I'm Heinz Ward, and then I'll toddle, say dada a few times, fall down and cry. O.K.,maybe not, but the picture of all of that seemed amusing to me!

Meanwhile, Springsteen is my favorite, so I'll enjoy him more than anything else going on.

Prediction: Steelers 97 Cardinals 3
See, I make this prediction because I've put the house up on that spread. If the Steelers don't beat the Cardinals by 94 points, I'm in big trouble. But if I win, I make 1 billion dollars on the spread. I think I have a good chance. I just told my wife. She won't stop crying. All she says is my house, my house. My beautiful house...wahhhhh.
 

EvaIlyxtra

Est. Contributor
Messages
3,055
Role
Adult Baby, Diaper Lover, Sissy, Other, Private
I'm predicting the Cardinals to win by 4 with at least 24 points. Boldin will get more yardage than Ward, Warner gets 350 yards, and Fitzgerald gets the super bowl MVP. Rothelisberger does good but will not get a passer rating over 69.5.

At least I was right about Boldin, warner and tha 4 points
 
Last edited:
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top