Pathetic little baby 😢👶

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teddybearbaby85

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So I have fallen again. I am so depressed and suicidal. I am laying here in my diaper and pacifier in mouth and really crying like a baby.
I have "regressed" so much these last couple of days that I don't notice when I wet. It is like nothing matters.
I hate myself for needing to be a baby just to survive.
I am overwhelmed. I wish I could either die or be a baby 24/7.
 

Tyger

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teddybear, don't feel that way! You shouldn't feel ashamed of needing to be a baby to survive. Everybody has their coping mechanisms and yours is one that is actually really cute and fun and harmless. You should not be ashamed about this, it is really a very beautiful thing.

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Please, if you are contemplating ways to commit suicide, call 1 (800) 273-8255.

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teddybear, You don't have to make life so binary, it doesn't have to be between,

1. Either i'm a full functioning 'normal' adult, which I think is depressing so I'd rather die.
2. I'm a full time baby which will be difficult because of the social structure of society.

The problem with both of those options is, they are not very realistic for anybody, and you probably wouldn't like either of them. If you were a full time baby, you might find that you miss driving, or playing video games, or just taking a walk on your own. Some parts of adult life are pretty cool.

If you were a full functioning 'normal' adult, then you would be extremely boring and dry because you would be part of the collective vanilla pop culture that doesn't actually exist and nobody can obtain because it is too perfected. No actually normal person is 'normal' because they have parts of their life that define their individuality. Parts of their life that makes them human, that makes them different than the rest.


Why don't you find a happy medium? You can find time in your life where it is totally acceptable for you to regress and let your baby side out.


Is there some underlying problem that is bothering you? How is your career and family life? Or is a lot of this coming from the inner conflict of self acceptance with your baby side?

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(quoting you so you get notified)
 

siysiy

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So I have fallen again. I am so depressed and suicidal. I am laying here in my diaper and pacifier in mouth and really crying like a baby.
I have "regressed" so much these last couple of days that I don't notice when I wet. It is like nothing matters.
I hate myself for needing to be a baby just to survive.
I am overwhelmed. I wish I could either die or be a baby 24/7.


Hi teddybearbaby85

I really hope you have a care giver with you to hug you and give you the care you are needing.

Don't be up set about wetting. That is what nappys are for. And pacifiers are made for stress relief.

I would encarage you to find someone that you can talk to that you can trust. Hopefully you have a nice doctor or nurse, that will help you work through, your depression.

It not going to be forever and ever. It will lift.

You haven't done enthing wrong and you are a good girl.

Any way this is what I Need to hear well I regressed and found I wasn't able to come back up quicky.
It actually tock me a couple of days.

This community is really supportive. But so was my big brother with the bottles and the huging and the listening as I talk things through.

I would also encourage you to spend some time playing as it will take your mind off how you feeling.
Hope you have soom favourite toys.

Hope this has help you in some way. I know what it's like. And you will come back up just take your time and go slowly.

Sisi


- - - Updated - - -

teddybear, don't feel that way! You shouldn't feel ashamed of needing to be a baby to survive. Everybody has their coping mechanisms and yours is one that is actually really cute and fun and harmless. You should not be ashamed about this, it is really a very beautiful thing.

- - - Updated - - -

Please, if you are contemplating ways to commit suicide, call 1 (800) 273-8255.

- - - Updated - - -

teddybear, You don't have to make life so binary, it doesn't have to be between,

1. Either i'm a full functioning 'normal' adult, which I think is depressing so I'd rather die.
2. I'm a full time baby which will be difficult because of the social structure of society.

The problem with both of those options is, they are not very realistic for anybody, and you probably wouldn't like either of them. If you were a full time baby, you might find that you miss driving, or playing video games, or just taking a walk on your own. Some parts of adult life are pretty cool.

If you were a full functioning 'normal' adult, then you would be extremely boring and dry because you would be part of the collective vanilla pop culture that doesn't actually exist and nobody can obtain because it is too perfected. No actually normal person is 'normal' because they have parts of their life that define their individuality. Parts of their life that makes them human, that makes them different than the rest.


Why don't you find a happy medium? You can find time in your life where it is totally acceptable for you to regress and let your baby side out.


Is there some underlying problem that is bothering you? How is your career and family life? Or is a lot of this coming from the inner conflict of self acceptance with your baby side?

- - - Updated - - -


(quoting you so you get notified)


:iagree:
 

CrazySmoker

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I love to play some baby stuff, sometimes a lot. But let it into 24/7 isn't very OK. Very important is find equilibration between adult resposabilities and baby stuff. Is hard work, but there's not another way. Selfbeating for be ABDL isn't any solution.
 
S

Starrunner

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So I have fallen again. I am so depressed and suicidal. I am laying here in my diaper and pacifier in mouth and really crying like a baby.
I have "regressed" so much these last couple of days that I don't notice when I wet. It is like nothing matters.
I hate myself for needing to be a baby just to survive.
I am overwhelmed. I wish I could either die or be a baby 24/7.



Hello, teddybearbaby85,
When you say that you have fallen again, it sounds like this is not the first time you have felt this depressed. Are there certain times when you feel this way or is it because of something specific going on in your life? You say you are overwhelmed. What is causing you to feel that way? Regardless, this sounds like a serious cry for help. Regressing can be healthy when it is used as a coping mechanism to escape from the realities of the outside world. It becomes dangerous when you use it to survive and hide from the world.

When people are depressed and talking about suicide, they become very limited in problem solving skills. This is because you are feeling overwhelmed and there is too much coming at you all at once, making it feel difficult to sort everything out. As a result you look for quick fix answers to your pain: Either live like a baby forever or just die. I believe there are much better options if you can just take the time to think this through, by identifying the causes of these feelings, and implementing a plan to eliminate these thoughts or reduce the anxiety and negative feelings in the future.

You really shouldn't be dealing with this on your own. No one can. Many forms of depression can be caused by clinical or physiological imbalances in your body, and it may need a doctor to ensure it is being treated properly. The good news is that depression can be treated and managed successfully.

In addition, depression can also make you feel that situational circumstances will not change, that you are not worthwhile. These are the lies that depression tells us, and none of it is true. We do get better, life gets better, so if the choices are living miserably or dying, I see a third alternative which is simply to reach out to someone as soon as possible. And yes, I speak as a suicide survivor.

Your profile says you're in Texas. In addition to the helpline that Tyger provided, you can find some additional resources specifically for Texas here:

http://www.suicide.org/hotlines/texas-suicide-hotlines.html

The Adisc article on suicide helplines also has some additional resources. "To Write Love on Her Arms" is an exceptional non-profit organization which has helped millions of people cope with depression and suicide through support and referrals:
https://twloha.com/

There is also Hopeline which is ABDL aware: 1-800-442-4673

https://www.adisc.org/forum/showthread.php/94110-Suicide-Prevention-Help-Lines?p=1338753#post1338753

There's a stigma attached to depression and too often it prevents us from reaching out and getting help. That shouldn't be the case.The truth is that depression affects one in five of us directly. This does not include the family members, friends, and colleagues who are also affected through their support and service of care. We are all affected by it.

There's a lot of help out there and it is available if you will just reach out and take it. Just take it. You opened up to us and it took tremendous courage. And we hear you. Now please, talk to someone IRL as soon as possible, whether it be a friend, family member or your doctor. If you don't have anyone to talk to, then please get yourself to the hospital. It may take every bit of energy to take that first step, but it will be worth it. There are better days ahead of you, I promise. I speak as a suicide survivor myself, and as a survivor of a partner's suicide. I know the pain it brings, but I also know that, with the proper help, it won't feel this way forever.
 
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CuddleFish

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:hugs:

There is nothing to be ashamed of. You are doing what you need to do to feel safe and you aren't hurting anybody.

The above posters have some really great advice about reaching out to people IRL, and I suggest you take it. I think I read that you struggle from bipolar, and that isn't easy to deal with. I am not bipolar but I've had my days where I couldn't do much more than rock myself and cry. Right now it seems all consuming, but it is transitory. You certainly don't want to end your life on such a low note.
 

teddybearbaby85

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Update.
I am still struggling but trying to get better. I wore pull ups instead of pampers today. I wet myself once.
I am still relying heavily on the pacifier.
Still a baby girl 👶
 
S

Starrunner

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I'm glad you're still here and that you're still trying. It's all any of us can do and, some days, it's the best we can hope for. Just keep doing anything that helps you get through this very difficult time. And, please... do consider reaching out for help.

We're here to support you. Feel free to send me a PM anytime.

Hugs.
 

Tyger

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I'm glad you are trying. Take care of yourself, and your baby side. It will get better with time.
 
D

D1aperBOY

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don't feel bad about being a baby!!!it is just who u are, your personality.
as for suicidal, that's just crazy!!! but wish you all the best and please do anything you can to get through this struggle (wearing nappies and sucking on pacifier 24/7 etc)
sorry not a person of many words but hope this helps:):)
 

foxkits

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We can be very sensitive being a AB/DL we see the world differently someone what.
When life's pressure,s or others being cruel can hurt us.
Why can others be so cruel we wounder then there are the old tape's that play in our head.
Like your not good enough or your never going to be any thing in life or your deferent.
Something's we grown up with being told we believe even when it's not true.
I'm a ab to feel safe been hurt badly in the past being little is my safe zone .
It's how I cope in life every day I pamper up and be my little self.
The thing is I have never fit in oh I'm very nice person.
But most times I'm just not cared if I'm around .
Your not pathetic in any way.

What I see is your having trouble accepting your being little.
We all have had these thought's that why Purge and binge cycle's we feel it's wrong.
Because Society doesn't accept it.
We all do thing's to feel good some eat some spend money some smoke drink.
You and I just go into our little place and be little a while color watching cartoons enjoying a cuddle with bear bear our plushes.
Love my binky too .
Some of those sissy dresses look so cute too.
You being a girl you can get away being and dressing cute.
I have met some littles that are like you they are great person's .
Some are very shy it ok we all can be .
If you can talk to others on here it can help you learn your ok .
Balance is the key.
Hey friend hug's from one little to another.
We all in the same boat here we love wearing our pampers.
Such a little thing to worry about.

Do go for walks ride a horse that can help your mood a lot.
I watch the bees, birds ,squirrels running around it's fun to watch .
The little part of me enjoy's this go see a kids movie .
Doing this helps me lots and lots.
You take care ok.
 

Unfusedd

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Hey! First of all, I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through this. I have Major Depressive Disorder and some generalized anxiety. It is really not easy. There is no quick fix and a lot of the progress I've made has come from working with/around it. I found things that helped by forcing myself to try new things (meetup.com is kind of cool, also things like gardening/growing flowers, learning an instrument...)
I've been able to find things that my little side loves as well. :cool:

It really really helps me to have a cuddle buddy. Have you tried online dating?
Having someone hold me or even baby talk with me is cool. Did wonders for my psyche.
Good luck.
 
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TeddyBearCowboy

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TEDDYBEARBABY85,

Gives you big teddy bear hugs :hug:

From one teddybear to another, I hope you may allow me to share a few things with you. As someone who has gone through not only being a child as ABDL, but adolescent, and teenager, then in my twenties, becoming a father, and then perhaps what some might call being in "mid-life", I have gone through quite a few different stages of love/hate relationships with my little side. But I have to admit that I truly believe I have finally figured out who I am and fully accepted my being little at times, yet also being an adult at others.

I have myself contemplated suicide before and I know what it feels like to just want to be free from the pains and suffing that may come from many different things in life. Being ABDL at times being one of them. At times embracing it, and at other times hating myself for it.

But teddybearbaby85, please know that you are someone special. The feelings that you have and the deisres that you feel for being little are not something to be upset with yourself over. If anything, the ability to connect with who you are as a little child or baby is something so many people lose in their lives. You are not someone different just because you are older. You are still that same person you were when you really were a baby in physical size. While you may have grown in stature, you are still that same person.

Do not hate yourself for having these feelings. It is actually something very special.

The key to getting past the feelings of hopelessness is to discover the balance of being yourself as both the little baby inside as well as being the older you. You are older physically and you cannot change that. But how awesome is it that you can still be your little self as well? To be able to embrace the person that we are at all stages of life without throwing away previous or future stages is something not to be shunned, but to be admired.

You are not alone. You are not the only one that has had these feelings. But search deep within and know that you are an awesome individual. Seek to find that balance between being little and the adult person you need to be in society to survive. The likelihood of becoming a baby 24/7 and having others who are wanting to care for you 24/7 as a baby is not being truthful. But none-the-less, you can find happiness in being both.

I have at times contemplated being a baby 24/7 and wondering what that might be like. But the bottom line is that I also love to do adult things at times as well. I love to hike, to fly, to fish, to go mountain biking, to climb tall mountains, to ride horse, to interact with others playing pool or football and other sports. If I was a baby always I would miss out on what also brings me joy.

Hence, the balance of being little and being adult truly is the best of both worlds.

I wish you the best and please know that you are not alone. You belong to a community here of people who care about you and truly understand.

TeddyBearCowboy

:detective3
 
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