Partners who changed opinions

Forced

Est. Contributor
Messages
298
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
Just wondering about relationships

Who here has had an accepting partner change there mind and decided they didn't approve any longer?

Who has lost a partner over this stuff
I’ve posted elsewhere before and other members responded that this is quite common.

My current G/F knew about my thing before we met, my online profile on POF mentioned about it as I knew that any future relationships I had must be accepting.
She responded online by saying she was intrigued and excited about that side of me and we met up and got to know each other.
After a while of seeing each other we became a couple and I moved into her house.

The first couple of years were great, she put me in nappies regularly and did all the things a caretaker would do but then we moved house and the times she would do it dropped off dramatically.
I understood that her role as ‘Mummy’ was demanding and I worried that she’d had enough.
I took to dressing myself when the urge got too strong which was generally met with silence and a change in mood from my partner. It got so bad that when I had a nappy on I would either sleep on the sofa or one of the spare rooms,
I felt ‘cheated’, I had been honest from the outset and her rejection of that side of me made me feel tricked as I knew I couldn’t live the rest of my life without acceptance of a partner and hiding my desires.
It made our relationship toxic, we got on okay but there was always an underlying tension which was probably down to the way I was feeling.
A similar pattern had happened in my previous relationship and it was one of the main reasons why we broken up and my feeling was that this was going the same way.

On the verge of splitting up we had a conversation about it and a few other things in our relationship and she admitted that she had withdrawn her services due to something I had said after a ABDL session, when I had apparently criticized the quality of her involvement which had knocked her confidence. The upshot was that she agreed to try being ‘Mummy’ again and I would give her advice rather than tell her off.

It’s been sometime now since she resumed her role and things couldn’t be better, we both seem to be happier in general and I can now certainly see a long term future.
I’m typing this whilst laying in bed, double diapered (Tykables under a cloth nappy and plastic pants) which I was put in for the night.....very happy and very wet 😊
 

BlueGrey

Est. Contributor
Messages
546
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Little
I was one of those who thought he could get married without telling her about my limitations, and thought I could just quit acting like a baby. Back then we did not have this communication level, so I had no advice from others like me.
She has switched from reasonable acceptance to violent rejection and back again several times. During times of acceptance we had a good relationship. This year it is rejection.
 

AComputerGuy

Est. Contributor
Messages
202
Role
  1. Adult Baby
I was one of those who thought he could get married without telling her about my limitations, and thought I could just quit acting like a baby. Back then we did not have this communication level, so I had no advice from others like me.
She has switched from reasonable acceptance to violent rejection and back again several times. During times of acceptance we had a good relationship. This year it is rejection.
That can't feel good going back and forward on it one minute you are stable the next you arnt

Why does she swap back and fourth?
 

Mal8

This too shall pass
Est. Contributor
Messages
132
Role
  1. Diaper Lover
  2. Little
I was one of those who thought he could get married without telling her about my limitations, and thought I could just quit acting like a baby. Back then we did not have this communication level, so I had no advice from others like me.
She has switched from reasonable acceptance to violent rejection and back again several times. During times of acceptance we had a good relationship. This year it is rejection.
I know what you mean. When I got together with my wife there was no internet as such so no resource for ABDL or any form of gender expression other than basic male/female and a local gay bar which was not a particularly safe place. Everything other than being straight and vanilla was viewed as abnormal. Anyway, I didn’t even understand myself back then so just kept it all quiet and was in denial! What I have learned from many others’ experiences is that I’d be best to continue to keep it quiet. Whilst that will never lead to a completely happy life for me, it will lead to an uneventful life until my kids leave home because being honest with my wife about myself will only lead to severe conflict at home. That conflict would devastate my kids’ happiness and I’d rather I was unhappy than them until they’re independent. I’m better able to cope with it anyway as I’m well practiced at repressing my true feelings and have been lucky and successful in other ways. I’d love to live in a world where people were free and able to express themselves (who here wouldn’t?!) however they wanted and for things such as gender reassignment to be a quick and easy process but that won’t happen in my lifetime! I don’t view this as being a pessimist, just a realist. And as a group we’re a lot luckier than previous generations or indeed people in other countries now where there is a high risk of being murdered or incarcerated for being identified as anything other than straight and god-fearing towards whichever one of the many religions of the world pertains to that particular country. Sorry if this should be in “Mature Topics” instead of here. Please note I’m not against people being religious as it provides a great deal of support and relief for millions and millions of people. I’m just not comfortable with proponents of any religion using it to justify killing, persecuting or trying to force harmless good people to try to be something they can’t ever be.
 

AComputerGuy

Est. Contributor
Messages
202
Role
  1. Adult Baby
That conflict would devastate my kids’ happiness and I’d rather I was unhappy than them until they’re independent. I’m better able to cope with it anyway as I’m well practiced
Im also struggling with some stuff recently

i think im going too live by that philosophy my baby side can be as unhappy as it wants as long as my kids are happy... Any major issues that would rock the boat should not be brought up for risk of the kids happiness
 

NorGirlBaby

Est. Contributor
Messages
297
Role
  1. Adult Baby
My ex did not know about my little side. We broke up because i felt our realitonship at stagned. And i started to feel more like a housemaid and felt i was always in his way. I am trying to find my new way. Looking to buy an apparment. I had a very good friendship with an dl that became my caregiver long time ago, when i just figured out about adult baby. But i didn't like that he wore diaper. I was the little in the friendship, he should be the adult taking care of me. I am not sure if i will find a "daddy" that is only a daddy. How easy is it?
 

Lyric

Contributor
Messages
596
Role
  1. Diaper Lover
My ex did not know about my little side. We broke up because i felt our realitonship at stagned. And i started to feel more like a housemaid and felt i was always in his way. I am trying to find my new way. Looking to buy an apparment. I had a very good friendship with an dl that became my caregiver long time ago, when i just figured out about adult baby. But i didn't like that he wore diaper. I was the little in the friendship, he should be the adult taking care of me. I am not sure if i will find a "daddy" that is only a daddy. How easy is it?
I hope you find the daddy of your dreams. You seem like a lovely girl. I do understand the desire to have a SO who will take of you when you want to diapered and suck on your paci, but not want the reverse as well. My SO accepts my diaper fetish and diapers me all the time and nurses me but also lets me be in charge of most things financial or business related and seeks out my advice on most things.
 

Daniel2013

Est. Contributor
Messages
20
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
My ex did not know about my little side. We broke up because i felt our realitonship at stagned. And i started to feel more like a housemaid and felt i was always in his way. I am trying to find my new way. Looking to buy an apparment. I had a very good friendship with an dl that became my caregiver long time ago, when i just figured out about adult baby. But i didn't like that he wore diaper. I was the little in the friendship, he should be the adult taking care of me. I am not sure if i will find a "daddy" that is only a daddy. How easy is it?
yeah this train of thought is very common.....its just a diaper though, how can you dismiss a guy and state "they cant ever take charge" just because they wear a thick piece of underwear? I'd understand if girls said they didnt want an adult baby but....a diaper? a piece of clothing? I now see why its so hard
 

BobbiSueEllen

A sweet, Pampered AB toddler girl
Est. Contributor
Messages
3,949
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Sissy
  3. Little
  4. Other
Two things that are certain that I've observed in my life are:
  • My fixation on diapers has not changed, and;
  • People do change.
In 1991, my ex and I were freshly engaged and knowing what was ahead, we had a "mutual confession": she stated hers, then I brought up my diapers. After spilling it all, she reflected and said "It seems rather odd but I can handle it. Just don't ask or expect me to change you".

Fair 'nuff. 8 months later, we tied the knot.

And things changed noticeably. Looking back, I think her acceptance was half-bluff, half-expecting this to be a phase that would fade off. Nope...2 years later, she confided to my friend about it (he knew already), saying she couldn't take it anymore...and that "[I was] weird" before trying to seduce him (he told me this once the divorce was finalized...and I trust him)...and she & I separated for a month. It was rough...but we reconciled.

When we got back together, she told me she felt my diapers were "the other woman" in our relationship. I backed off because I loved her...but in 1999 it came back some after I found AB/DL online. The year before, I spent the entire summer in Attends due to urge incontinence brought on by stress. It was tough but we both survived it...now, she was thinking differently, so much as to begin dabbling in liaisons...and felony crime (B&E).

Almost two years after she B&Ed my gramma's house...she left as I began coping with illness which led to my current disability..

She took 8 months and then tried to reconcile...with "terms"; she wanted control of every facet of my life. Then she tried to pressure me with religion. She wouldn't let up and it was clear I could never be what she seemed to need. So...I filed. 29 months later...it was over.

I still love to be in diapers, no less than ever. That didn't change as much as other things about me did. And as other things about my ex changed. Partners can make promises to the moon, but the fact that stuck with me, after considerable distilling by time, is that some things change...some don't. We can't choose or control what. It's part of our differences, part of our lives. Part of life. Risk.

We don't have to like it to any degree but we do just have to accept what we can't change, work to change what we can...and realize risk is everywhere. Just my .000002 Bitcoin. :unsure:
 

CookieMonstah

Est. Contributor
Messages
2,078
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
  3. Little
I've had the exact opposite. I told my girlfriend before we started dating to get it out in the open and tell her if she wanted to do nothing with me then so be it. She accepted me and over the last 6/7 months has let me wear nappies around her and now roleplays in being my mummy and she's becoming so much more confident and outgoing. I love it.
 

Lyric

Contributor
Messages
596
Role
  1. Diaper Lover
The point that BobbieSueEllen makes that a diaper fetish, or whatever you choose to call it, is deeply embedded in our psyche and will never disappear and I know others have to same experience. So for those who are younger and not completely comfortable about their desire to wear and wet their diapers, but want to have a long term relationship with someone, either be completely honest about your diaper interest and its importance or avoid becoming too involved until you have a full understanding of your own diaper desires. Like others too many people will think it will disappear over time and it doesn't. The more you repress it the stronger it becomes.
 

BobbiSueEllen

A sweet, Pampered AB toddler girl
Est. Contributor
Messages
3,949
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Sissy
  3. Little
  4. Other
The point that BobbieSueEllen makes that a diaper fetish, or whatever you choose to call it, is deeply embedded in our psyche and will never disappear and I know others have to same experience. So for those who are younger and not completely comfortable about their desire to wear and wet their diapers, but want to have a long term relationship with someone, either be completely honest about your diaper interest and its importance or avoid becoming too involved until you have a full understanding of your own diaper desires. Like others too many people will think it will disappear over time and it doesn't. The more you repress it the stronger it becomes.
Perhaps, but in varying levels. But for the biggest majority, this will be a lifelong thing. So, in my instance, I chose to embrace it because I can't overcome it. And realizing that most women don't want a guy in diapers who doesn't need them (plus I'm hard on the eyes), I came to accept my odds of another relationship where my diapers will be accepted by the other partner are extremely slim to nil.

So...on with my life. 🥳🧸🍼🤗🥰
 

NorGirlBaby

Est. Contributor
Messages
297
Role
  1. Adult Baby
The point that BobbieSueEllen makes that a diaper fetish, or whatever you choose to call it, is deeply embedded in our psyche and will never disappear and I know others have to same experience. So for those who are younger and not completely comfortable about their desire to wear and wet their diapers, but want to have a long term relationship with someone, either be completely honest about your diaper interest and its importance or avoid becoming too involved until you have a full understanding of your own diaper desires. Like others too many people will think it will disappear over time and it doesn't. The more you repress it the stronger it becomes.
I thought i was an over it. Many years, and my desired to wear diapers and act like a baby didn't gave me anything. I think it was cause i was more focused on other things. I had personal trainer for years, and was a lot at the gym and lifting weights. Ended the week with a glass of wine with my now so called ex. I was more into the adult side of me. But i had kept a lot of my ab clothes, and hid it from him. Was afraid he would find them. And i started to dream while i was sleeping that i was taken care of like an adult baby. I dreamed i was wearing diapers again. Luckily i never wet the bed. And i wonder if i talked about in sleep. I started to act childish too, i watched cartoons and listened to children music at Spotify.
 

Subtlerustle

Est. Contributor
Messages
654
Role
  1. Diaper Lover
Me.

Spouse accepted & encouraged, then decided newp, and left.
That’s tough when you think you know where you stand with someone then pffft, it turns on a dime. I sometimes wonder if we internalize that every negative thing happens because of our “thing” vs just a relationship running it’s course.
 

KittyMerriweather

Est. Contributor
Messages
546
Role
  1. Other
That’s tough when you think you know where you stand with someone then pffft, it turns on a dime. I sometimes wonder if we internalize that every negative thing happens because of our “thing” vs just a relationship running it’s course.
That is exactly what we do. Therapist assured me spouse waa just using my "thing" as an easy way out. That sort of made sense. But I see other people claim the same situation happened to them.

Sooooo either the world is fully of flighty individuals just itching to flee ORRRR this diaper thing really is more of a deal breaker than we who live it want to admit.
 
Last edited:

NorGirlBaby

Est. Contributor
Messages
297
Role
  1. Adult Baby
I think people think about diapers for babies and eldery people. So maybe the not an/dl community can't see it the way we do. Many years ago some people at my work had seen a documentary about adult babies. And they were talking about in the lunch. I felt my stomache was getting hit. She did not talk nice about it.
 
Top