I'm guessing you're pretty new to the online ABDL community. Turns out, there's actually a lot of us, and we're not all creeps and degenerates.
Our community has quite the online presence, if you know where to look. I'm not sure what ADISC's rules are for posting links to other community sites, so I apologize if this is out of line.
First off, there's Daily Diapers. DD is pretty much at the top of the list, almost certainly the largest and most established ABDL community on the web. They have ties (of varying degrees) to many of the large paysites and product manufacturers/distributors, and offer an unrivaled collection of articles, stories, pictures and videos. I've not spent much time on their forums, so I can't really speak on that.
I'd say ADISC and DD are the best starting points for familiarizing yourself with the online ABDL community. DD acts as something of a central hub for everything ABDL, making it absolutely invaluable (given the massive number of ABDL websites/forums/etc all over the web). ADISC is a pretty active and close-knit community of like-minded people, the vast majority of which are extremely knowledgeable, friendly and helpful. ADISC can serve as a social safety-net of sorts, and helps to keep the kink/fetish somewhat grounded (I've found most people here are very down-to-earth and realistic), with emphasis on separating fantasy from reality.