oh no, i'm popular!

[link]

All of my life, I’ve pretty much been hated by everyone my age. I use to care in elementary school, but I’ve completely lost interest in a social life. My Junior year in high school I met this one boy and we became friends. He introduced me to his group and I became apart of it. It was pretty cool, but I didn’t think much of it. They invited me to go to a school dance with the group, where I learned that everyone in the group, except for one of the two guys, had a crush on me (5 girls and the one boy that I met first). I didn’t really care, I actually thought it was really funny. Now, my senior year, that group has grown, my old friends have gotten more needy, and a new group of freshman now adore me and follow me around everywhere. I just can’t take it. I’m a loner, and I really don’t like being around a lot of people. Now, I’ve always got somebody following me around, and I just can’t take it. I’m actually getting stressed out about it!

Along with all of the new unexpected friends, I’ve picked up a few stalkers. I see these people way too much during the day, and they constantly try to find ways to spend more time with me. The freshmen fan club I mentioned earlier has two members who are stalkers. They even know my locker combination because they’ve watched me open it so many times that they learned the combo and now use my locker for some of their stuff which makes it easier to hang around me.

I also, the boy I originally met has fallen in love with me. He’s written me a few letters explaining how he feels. It’s obvious through his writing that it’s not just a simple crush. We just had charity bash week at our school, and one of the things we have is an auction wall. Well, my friends convinced me to put up “a date with me” on the auction wall. The boy that like me and the freshmen fan club fought over it. The boy that likes me won with a final bid was 75$! So during winter break I’m going to go to the movies and out for ice cream where he says he has more to tell me that he can’t put on paper. He’s been so open to me, and I know it has been hard for him, that I think I’m going to tell him about infantilism. I know he’s not going to tell anyone because he has already trusted me with his deep dark secret, which is not that the likes me. It’s something else that I won’t put on here.

So, I’m popular and I hate it, I have stalkers, I have a gay lover, and I’m about to tell that gay lover my deepest, and really my only secret. I did not see this coming.

 

[Error404]

Well then. I don't there's much more for me to say other than 'Good luck!' and 'Congratulations!'.

I've always been pretty popular amongst other things, so I can see where you're coming from though I can't say I've had girls (Or guys!) fight/bid over me. Though I do currently have an online stalker which is kinda fun.

 

[starshine]

Eh, I don't care about online things, I don't think you can really compare that to real life.

I know what you mean though, I hit high and low points in my social life. To the point where sometimes it feels like I have no spare time at all between several activities and friends. Then I just want to tell everyone to eff off so I have some alone time. I don't know about you, but I'd rather have lots of friends, than none at all. Maybe you can just say you have family commitments or something so you have at least some alone time?

 

[EmeraldsAndLime]

There's millions of people out there who would kill to be in your position. Savour the moment and just enjoy yourself, don't let it slip away because when it comes to living out in the real world, you may get sent back to square one. Having such a huge variance in social position doesn't do much good for you, so just be wary.

 

[miles]

I'm glad I'm not in your position.
It'd be too scary for me.

 

[BabyMullet]

Well ain't life grand?

I quote:

Life is trouble, only death is not. To be alive is to un-do your belt and look for trouble!

~

Zorba the Greek.

 

[EpicPie]

Well at least im happy to someone else who is a loner like me, honestly I like to be by myself and not be bothered but I have like 50 million people adore me during lunch and just sit next to me, it gets annoying.

 

[Peachy]

I don't mind a bit of popularity. Post people in my high school knew me, and since I've taught many classes at my university (even as a student), many students knew me too. It went so far that people randomly called my name across a square downtown and I had no clue who was yelling (or why).

But your situation sounds a lot worse. It sounds more like stalking. I'm wondering if they're genuinely interested in you, or if they just get a kick out of following you around. Obviously, that doesn't quite apply to the person who has a crush on you. Maybe you can talk him into helping you to get rid of those young freshment stalkers once and for all?!

Peachy

 

[dogboy]

I'm caught between whether it's a good problem to have or a bad one, though Lukie is right, that will all change when you graduate. I had a similar problem when I was in college, because I went to a music conservatory. Half the male population was gay, and I was reasonably good looking, and a weight lifter, so I had a good bod. I would go into the bathroom at school, on the stall walls would be written, "I want to fu*k Dogboy". Well, not Dogboy, of course, but real, and stupid, name. I don't know why my parents didn't name me Englebert Humperdink, as my name is almost as dumb. Anyway, it was weird to be pursude (sp) by guys. Of course, in my case, I became intimate with one of them, but that has been a topic in other threads.

Anyway, I do think your situation if VERY VERY weird, particularly with the freshmen, and learning your locker combination, etc. And then the love auction. As crazy as I was in college, you may be giving my reputation a run for the money, in which case you may win the Pulitzer prize this year for weirdness. I think all you can do is lay back and watch what happens with a sense of amusement.

As for the boy who loves you, I've been there on his end with my friend John who I've also written about in other threads. All I can tell you is that it is so incredibly painful. It's one of the things that eventually led me to my psychotic break and the shrink. Be gentle with him if you can, and be a friend to him. John was always kind to me, and always a friend, for which I will always love him. Life is difficult at best. You know from past comments, I think you are a great guy, particularly because of your giving nature, as a scout leader, and you love of working with kids and others. I may be that these people see that loving kindness nature and are drawn to it. I suspect I would as well if I was one of them. It could be that the world needs more people like you, Link.

 

[link]

For all of thoes with the question "is this a good or bad thing?" I'd have to say it's a good thing. I have little care about what happens to me, and if other people enjoy hanging around me (or even ripping on me) it just doesn't bother me. The only thing i don't like are the phone calls. I really don't like the phone because I can't multi task, and I talk with my hands.

As for the boy, I do like him, as a friend of course. Other people ask how I put up with it, and it's very simple. To me, hanging out with him is like hanging out with any other of my friends, but to him, it's much better. I see it like this. If he gets so much more out of being around me than I expected, then why should i feal any different about it. I'll just keep doin what I was doin and let him feal however he wants. It really doesn't bother me.

Dogboy, about not hurting him, he's already asked me that, but in different words. at the end of the most recent letter he wrote to me he concluded with "please be carful with my hart". It made me smile because I finally understood how much trust he was giving me without him even wanting to. I will never hurt him on purpose, but I know I will hurt him eventually. He's younger than me, so I'll be going to college and he wont. All I hope is that he'll be able to cope, or better yet find somebody else. Otherwise I'm going to have to spend a lot more time on the phone than I plan too.

And thanks for the compliments Dogboy. It means more than what I can put into words.

 

[Charlie]

I was going to suggest that you sleep with everybody, but you're asexual right? So I'm guessing that wouldn't be an option...

I think you should be flattered, and should probably change your locker combination...

I don't even know what to suggest anyway. I wouldn't try to fix the problem because you seem to be in quite a good position, expect for the stalkers. Have you tried being really harsh with them?

 

[Peachy]

I was going to suggest that you sleep with everybody,

I think that is the kind of popularity you do not want to have.

Peachy

 

[Charlie]

I think that is the kind of popularity you do not want to have.

Peachy

It's more like turning your popularity to your advantage.

Actually, the reason I say that is if everybody fancies you, and you never go out with anyone then that makes you even more fancy-able, people want what they can't have.
Shag a couple of them and you'll find yourself less popular.

(Unless you're really big good)

 

[EmeraldsAndLime]

^^ Not the size that counts, but how you use it.

 

[Mr Alex]

I was going to suggest that you sleep with everybody

I was going to suggest this and mean it.

I like your situation, it is interesting, much different from mine. Maybe you should give them a quota of the maximum time each of them can spend with you. Whatever you do, make sure you take advantage of the situation, don't let it just sit.

 

[BromeTeks]

Yeah, I also hate the stalker thing, but I have managed to get rid of my stalkers more recently, so I am happy now.

For you, I'm not really sure what to say, just enjoy the moment and try not to screw up too badly, unless that is your intention.

 

[ShippoFox]

I wasn't really popular at all, but I got along with almost everyone in high school. It wasn't the same before then though. People gave me some trouble in earlier grades (as the grade number goes down, the social troubles I had go up). Anyway, I had a hard time when I had two "best" friends during middle school. I always felt bad when one friend wanted to do something, but I'd already promised to go over to my other friend's house. In high school, I felt like my "best" friend (neither of the two mentioned earlier) kinda expected too much from me. He'd get kinda mad when I turned down his plans to do stuff. He was kind arrogant too (I think he said so himself a few times, if I remember correctly). We were friends though, so I'm kinda disappointed that we haven't talked in a few years.

Anyway, just be careful with what you do. You don't want to tell everyone to screw off, but you can't do everything with everyone. It's a tough balance to find... everyone needs friends, but everyone needs some time alone sometimes.

 

[link]

Have you tried being really harsh with them?

I could never be harsh with any of them. I'm too nice of a person (crap).

I am asexual, so I don't want to sleep with any of them, but could if I wanted to.

And the balance you were talking about shippo, I already have it. It just means I get to spend less time to myself. The balance I want is that no one will bother me at home and I'll get all of my time to myself... but that'll never happen.

I do enjoy the attention, and I think it's cool that so many people enjoy being around me, I'm just not use to it.

 

[quattrus]

Where I live we have a saying that goes more or less like this "Who has bread doesn't have teeth; who has teeth doesn't have bread".

I understand what you mean because I've never been a very social guy, and never had a fixed group of friends to hang out with. When I felt like going out, I aggregated with some of the groups of my classmates, but generally never the same one. And when I felt like staying home with myself I did so without having people bothering me. This is certainly a good tactic to avoid stalkers, but then getting attentions from nice people is not a bad sensation after all - even if you're not a "social animal".

So, as others said, my suggestion is to enjoy the popularity you have and, above all, don't waste the rare treasure you have found - a nice friend of yours who's deeply in love with you.

Remember that...

There's millions of people out there who would kill to be in your position.

:biggrin:

 

[tbjay]

I normally DO NOT CONDONE THIS

But hey, in todays economy, 75 bucks is a few meals, you know what I mean?

Just saying....At this point if I thought people would pay, I'd sell myself to dating. Granted, my crowds are either into church and doing good or into drugs and raving, I guess I'm sorta in between them being the kid who wants to be a toddler for random amounts of time....Yea, if you hang around this site and get people to pay to date you

You are ....Epically Awesome