Yeah it is haha sorry I was watching something at the same time I was writing and lost my train of thought but that's exactly what I was trying to get at. It's also easy for people to sit behind their computer screen and say whatever they want with zero consequences.
But then you're getting into the even larger question of the objectification of social contact as a whole by the Internet - the consequence-free environment of saying whatever you want will always create not only people who objectify - accidentally or purposefully, but people who feel objectified - rightly or wrongly! There's a very fine line between fighting against the historical sexism of society and unfairly vilifying others for reasonable (or at least only slightly off) attitudes.
As others have said, the AB/DL community is largely male, and as a matter purely of historical precedent, the male population of a site oriented towards something that's a kink for many will inevitable attract the objectifying attitude. Many of those males will never realize they're doing it, and would even never do it to any real woman they met. The attitude I've heard most often when confronting them about it is, "Why are you getting worked up about that? It's just a story/drawing/picture/movie, not a real person!"(Nevermind that pictures and movies are typically of real people.)