Not sure I have incontinence...

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iam32bit

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Hi everyone,

I have gotten much better at wearing at night to manage having to get up to pee. There was a night or two where I didn't wear and was annoyed when I had to get up in the middle of the night. I still wish there was something my doctors could do to prevent the need of diapers but I have grown to appreciate how much they have improved my life.

I wake up feeling much more refreshed and having much more energy. I have gotten the cleanup and disposal down pact and have yet to get a diaper rash. When I am doing state to state driving I wear them instead of stopping. When I need to focus at work I wear them but very rarely.

I use Molicare Super Pluses during the day and Dry24/7s every night. I find the Dry24/7s to be far to bulky and noisy.

I know I am not a ABDL, I don't wish to explore that either. The guilt factor has worn off quite a bit where I don't care if someone spots me when disposing one in a shopping bag.

One thing I hate is when I have a night where I didn't need to use it. I don't like wasting them as they can't be used the next night. On weekends I tend to just stay in one if I wake up dry and use it before disposing it.

Diapers can be really convenient for people like me with OAB induced by Medications. I wish I had the courage to wear 24/7 as I know they would make my life that much more manageable. I hate having to use the bathroom at the mall, movies, food stores, restaurants, gas stations (Eww...) or when I am going for a walk at the park.

I am not sure if I am technically "Incontinent" but diapers have really helped me manage an inconvenient situation.

Thanks,
 

ClickyKeys

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  1. Incontinent
One thing I hate is when I have a night where I didn't need to use it. I don't like wasting them as they can't be used the next night. On weekends I tend to just stay in one if I wake up dry and use it before disposing it.

If it is just when sleeping for you, you may consider looking into getting a pair or two of cloth diapers and plastic pants since those can be washed and reused and could save you a lot of money if you don't have to wear 24/7.
 

iam32bit

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  1. Incontinent
If it is just when sleeping for you, you may consider looking into getting a pair or two of cloth diapers and plastic pants since those can be washed and reused and could save you a lot of money if you don't have to wear 24/7.
Thanks for the advice. I have never tried cloth diapers. I read up on them and felt that they would be a pain to clean. I like disposables since they are tossed and there's no mess. I just wish they could be reused if not used the night before.

I don't wear 24/7 even though some on this forum have recommended doing so. I hate when in the span of 8 hours I use the bathroom close to 6 times or more on worse days.

I am on a diuretic for hormone issues. Ever since I started them the issue has gotten worse. OAB runs in my family, both my aunt and mother have it. I really miss the days when I could go a whole work day without having to use the bathroom.

This even impacts me when going out in public. I hate having to miss parts of a movie. I also hate how often I am away from a bathroom that is semi clean. I often find the bathrooms near me to be disgusting. Tie that with how often I need to use the bathroom and you can see why I do my best to hold it.

Holding it always results in pain. I have been tested and everything comes back negative. I have been checked out by a few doctors and they all say my meds are too blame. Unfortunately there's no alternative. It really is a pick your poison situation.

Ugh... I really wish I wasn't dealing with this. I took for granted the luxury of having a good bladder. I am in my mid 20s and I am sounding like a old woman. [emoji17]

I really take into consideration every bit of advice offered here. I guess I am still not satisfied with how I am dealing with this situation.
 

iam32bit

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  1. Incontinent
we have gone down this road before. not going to comment.

I don't understand why you are expressing animosity towards me. I am still trying to figure things out and you were so harsh on my other posts. It is not easy convincing oneself that wearing diapers is the best option. I have done everything you advised except for wearing 24/7. I still feel off about doing that. Every doctor I have been to has stated over and over that my medication is to blame. I could stop my medications, then my hormones would go out of wack and can cause serious health risks. Cancer, osteoporosis, blood clots, heart attacks and much more can be caused with my hormones being screwed up.

I guess what I am going through is denial and trying to make is sound less of a problem. Sure I could go the whole day and night not wearing a diaper. My quality of sleep would be destroyed, I would be interrupted during the day more than the average person. I have not wet the bed since I was 21, I am now 27. I don't fear of leaking nor peeing myself. It is just the pain that is often hard to bear and leaves me running to the bathroom for relief.

I do worry that since I excuse myself to go to the bathroom multiple times at work, that my boss would fire me over that. Would diapers eleviate that?

Here are my pros and cons

Pros
- Don't have to rush to the bathroom
- Reduce the number of trips to the bathroom
- Don't have to worry about being far from a bathroom
- Don't have to endure pain in the attempts of holding it
- Get a good nights rest
- Allows me to enjoy movies and shows without interruption

Cons,
- Cost, I just bought 72 Dry24/7s at $112 shipped also the cost of baby poweder and wipes
- Crinkle, I don't want people to find out that I am wearing a diaper, also the noise makes me feel ashamed
- Clean up, when changing a diaper I have to wash that area good or risk rashes and UTIs
- Smell, if I am in a diaper for too long there is a risk of a smell which forces me to change more frequently
- Lack of understanding, most people associate a diaper with babies and disabilities

This is all I can think of currently. If anyone else has some pros and cons or has comments on my pros and cons please contribute your thoughts. I am trying to weigh everything and go what's best for me. Maybe I am blind and need someone to help me see.

Thanks,
 

PlotTwist

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  1. Diaper Lover
  2. Incontinent
I had the same thoughts. If I was completely and totally incontinent and dependent on diapers, it would be easier to say "I need to wear them", instead of "I *can* make it to the bathroom most times, I just have to run, and holding it hurts". With me, if I hold it too long I will end up leaking onto my pants if I am not wearing a diaper, so that is classified as "urge incontinence".

When people have trouble focusing on very small text, but otherwise have good vision, they'll use what are called "cheater" glasses, the kind you find for sale at drug stores. When people have a bad knee, they might use a brace to add stability. These are all chronic medical conditions that are treated by an aid, just the same way using diapers helps you get on with your life, despite incontinence. The only difference is that there's a social stigma attached to diapers.

Whereas it is true that you did have a post not unlike this one before, and got much the same responses, I have to sympathize that I had the exact same reaction of not believing what I was reading and thinking "yeah, but I don't NEED to wear all the time. just most of the time". I started wearing 24/7 because of the convenience it gives me back. I don't have to run for the next bathroom or create a map in my head of how to get to one wherever I am if the urge arises and doesn't give me enough warning. Even if it does give me enough warning, but I'm busy doing something that I can't interrupt, I'll sometimes just use my diaper. It's ultimately a choice that you have to make for yourself, but it sounds as if you've already come to the conclusion that it's not really a big deal, just put on a diaper and get back to your life as it was before all of this.

Oh, and as for waking up dry and not wanting to waste the diaper, I just continue wearing it until it's time to change. Unless you're wearing pants with a thin material, even a Dry24/7 can be concealed under tight clothing if you're crafty enough, and far easier under loose clothing. As for the crinkle, don't pay it any mind. Few people will even notice, and if they do, they won't care.
 

mikejames

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317
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  1. Incontinent
wearing diapers because you don't feel like getting up at night or stopping the car is NOT incontinence. Incontinence is when regardless of how hard you try not to piss yourself, you do anyway. It's uncontrollable and extremely humiliating. So no, you're not incontinent. You just a person who likes wearing diapers.

- - - Updated - - -

RE: OAB.....OAB without incon is probably in some ways worse than OAB with incon. I have OAB and wear diapers because if I don't I'll wet my pants a could times a day in front of everyone. Before my OAB got to this point, it was just a severe nuisance. ALWAYS having to go. Always rushing to get there. Not having accidents but constant intense urges. Interrupting everything. Once it got worse and worse to the point that I became incontinent and had to wear diapers, it was honestly a relief. I don't have to rush to the bathroom bc I already know I won't make it anyway and my diaper will catch it. Instead I can enjoy the movie, get the work done, ride my motorcycle longer etc. I'd much rather find a miracle cure of OAB and just go back to 100% normal bladder function but since that's a pipe dream I can say diapers are a much better practical solution than the crappy meds they like to force on you.
 

iam32bit

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  1. Incontinent
wearing diapers because you don't feel like getting up at night or stopping the car is NOT incontinence. Incontinence is when regardless of how hard you try not to piss yourself, you do anyway. It's uncontrollable and extremely humiliating. So no, you're not incontinent. You just a person who likes wearing diapers.

- - - Updated - - -

RE: OAB.....OAB without incon is probably in some ways worse than OAB with incon. I have OAB and wear diapers because if I don't I'll wet my pants a could times a day in front of everyone. Before my OAB got to this point, it was just a severe nuisance. ALWAYS having to go. Always rushing to get there. Not having accidents but constant intense urges. Interrupting everything. Once it got worse and worse to the point that I became incontinent and had to wear diapers, it was honestly a relief. I don't have to rush to the bathroom bc I already know I won't make it anyway and my diaper will catch it. Instead I can enjoy the movie, get the work done, ride my motorcycle longer etc. I'd much rather find a miracle cure of OAB and just go back to 100% normal bladder function but since that's a pipe dream I can say diapers are a much better practical solution than the crappy meds they like to force on you.
I am not a person who loves to wear diapers. I have OAB and leak from time to time.

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DLScottsman

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I have OAB and can normally make it to the restroom. I wear 24/7 because I have had the occasion where making it was not an option. Because of that I was going cheap and wearing Walgreens Day and night diapers until one day I needed to use it and it was far larger of a wetting than I was expecting. I leaked on my car seat. I have since moved to wearing ABU Preschool diapers during the day and my cloth AIO at night.
 

iam32bit

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103
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  1. Incontinent
I have OAB and can normally make it to the restroom. I wear 24/7 because I have had the occasion where making it was not an option. Because of that I was going cheap and wearing Walgreens Day and night diapers until one day I needed to use it and it was far larger of a wetting than I was expecting. I leaked on my car seat. I have since moved to wearing ABU Preschool diapers during the day and my cloth AIO at night.

How are the cloth diapers? I am interested in them for the sake of saving money. After using them, are they difficult to clean and maintain?
 

Slomo

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I used to have urge incontinence combined with detrusor sphincter dyssenergya. Basically I would get a painful urge to go, but no matter what I would not involuntarily leak urine until I strained really hard to go (including waking up at night and then straining). Although I never once leaked without consciously trying to, I was most certainly incontinent and needed a diaper. (Fyi, my dsd is almost surgically taken care of now, and half of the time I fully leak without any control)
 

mikejames

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I am not a person who loves to wear diapers. I have OAB and leak from time to time.

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wasn't sure. Your OP didn't say you leak, it just listed all the conveniences of going in a diaper. If you DO leak sometimes then yes that's incontinence. Incon can be on a spectrum from small leaks here and there to full gushes and floods all the time.

I have OAB with urge incon. I am not ab/dl and only found this site searching online for incon support. This site calls itself AB/DL/IC support but buries the incon section under the diaper lover forum. Kind of disappointing.
 

iam32bit

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wasn't sure. Your OP didn't say you leak, it just listed all the conveniences of going in a diaper. If you DO leak sometimes then yes that's incontinence. Incon can be on a spectrum from small leaks here and there to full gushes and floods all the time.

I have OAB with urge incon. I am not ab/dl and only found this site searching online for incon support. This site calls itself AB/DL/IC support but buries the incon section under the diaper lover forum. Kind of disappointing.
I agree, the leaking always happens after using the bathroom. My panties have a yellow stain from it. I thought about wearing pads but they don't help with the constant need to use the bathroom. Like yesterday I used the bathroom 7 times during a 8 hour work day. I am almost convinced that my boss is going to become annoyed with me. [emoji17]

I am at ends with the idea of wearing diapers at work. It is a small office with a few guys. I am the only girl. Since it is a quiet workplace I am certain they will hear the crinkle. I tried cloth backed diapers and they leak and don't hide the smell like the plastic ones I use at night time.

This is why I have been asking for advice. I don't trust myself to make the right decision. My doctor's have suggested diapers. They claim that my OAB is being caused by my hormones. I was diagnosed with PCOS back when I was 15. There are no alternatives for the medications.

I hate being labeled as a DL, I don't have any desires to wear a diaper other than how it can help my issue.
 

mikejames

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317
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  1. Incontinent
I agree, the leaking always happens after using the bathroom. My panties have a yellow stain from it. I thought about wearing pads but they don't help with the constant need to use the bathroom. Like yesterday I used the bathroom 7 times during a 8 hour work day. I am almost convinced that my boss is going to become annoyed with me. [emoji17]

I am at ends with the idea of wearing diapers at work. It is a small office with a few guys. I am the only girl. Since it is a quiet workplace I am certain they will hear the crinkle. I tried cloth backed diapers and they leak and don't hide the smell like the plastic ones I use at night time.

This is why I have been asking for advice. I don't trust myself to make the right decision. My doctor's have suggested diapers. They claim that my OAB is being caused by my hormones. I was diagnosed with PCOS back when I was 15. There are no alternatives for the medications.

I hate being labeled as a DL, I don't have any desires to wear a diaper other than how it can help my issue.

Sorry, I misunderstood and didn't mean to suggest you were DL if you're not. I too am not in any way interested in the fetish and want nothing to do with it. I don't judge those who are, fetishes are harmless, but I'm just not into it.


I have OAB too and it's gotten worse and worse. My leaks happen when I get a crazy sudden urge to go and i might have anywhere from a few second to a few minutes to get to a bathroom. It's not every time I have to pee, only like 30% of the time. And of the times I have these crazy strong urges, only half or less of them result in leaks. But when they do, they often are enough volume to make my pants obviously wet. I've overwhelmed pull ups a few times but I've only used the cheap Depends ones.

I hear Seni Pullups are really good. I've used their Quatro diapers at night and they work well. You might have luck with those. They'd be quiet at least.

If those don't work, take a look at Northshore Supreme Lites. They are plastic backed but very quiet. I wear them and under jeans and boxer briefs you can't hear them. And "lite" is a misnomer because they're very very capable diapers.

I've tried meds too. I'd rather just wear protection. The meds all made me feel like crap and didn't fully work anyway.
 

MandyBear

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900
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  3. Carer
I am at ends with the idea of wearing diapers at work. It is a small office with a few guys. I am the only girl.
Since it is a quiet workplace I am certain they will hear the crinkle.

Hey 32

I don't know what kind of office you work in, or the appropriate work attire, which would help, but.

I have some experience with wearing in public & at work, I too wear plastic backed as well.
I can give you a few tips that can help, even if some of them seem obvious.

Unless you work in a library, wear one & like to dance around then I would say you are safe.
Important tip = a tight diaper does not make nearly as much noise as as a loose one does.

Pants / Jeans / Slacks = again tighter the better. Seriously. Contrary to popular belief, baggy loose fits don't help your cause.

Pantyhose and tights = like I said, a tight fitting one under those will make little to no noise, ya for winter tights!
I know smooth hose or tights over smooth diaper = ride down, hate that. Doesn't happen so much with cotton (cable knit) tights.

Bodysuits = very in fashion ATM, easy to find, quite comfy/versatile & importantly keep everything in place & snug = less chance of crinkle.

Skorts = ya I know, love'em or hate'em, but I have found some very nice work appropriate ones. They aren't just for 10 year olds anymore :)
Skirts = well obviously, the thicker the material the better, form fitting (not talking total bodycon here, it is work after all, lol, just more fitted thru the hips) even better. Longer lengths, maxis are great too.

Dresses = oddly enough, A line, skater, flowy, waist defining (with more of a free flowingthru hips to hem), you get the point.
They actually seem to work quite well, I would suggest hose/tights to keep top, tabs/edges of your diaper from catching the material.

Of course any type of spandex, stretchy, tight boy short bottoms or shape wear work wonders too.

And in case you're wondering how one might look under tighter/more form fitting jeans/pants/skirts/ect = I've yet to find myself with any VDL. :)
About all I've noticed is that my butt is a lil bigger, which for someone with no ass like me, which isn't too bad a thing, lol.

I hope that maybe I've put at least one thing you might not have thought of, or at least helped a lil to put your mind at ease about having to wear at work.
I'd be happy to talk more if you want, just PM me :)
 

iam32bit

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  1. Incontinent
Hey 32

I don't know what kind of office you work in, or the appropriate work attire, which would help, but.

I have some experience with wearing in public & at work, I too wear plastic backed as well.
I can give you a few tips that can help, even if some of them seem obvious.

Unless you work in a library, wear one & like to dance around then I would say you are safe.
Important tip = a tight diaper does not make nearly as much noise as as a loose one does.

Pants / Jeans / Slacks = again tighter the better. Seriously. Contrary to popular belief, baggy loose fits don't help your cause.

Pantyhose and tights = like I said, a tight fitting one under those will make little to no noise, ya for winter tights!
I know smooth hose or tights over smooth diaper = ride down, hate that. Doesn't happen so much with cotton (cable knit) tights.

Bodysuits = very in fashion ATM, easy to find, quite comfy/versatile & importantly keep everything in place & snug = less chance of crinkle.

Skorts = ya I know, love'em or hate'em, but I have found some very nice work appropriate ones. They aren't just for 10 year olds anymore :)
Skirts = well obviously, the thicker the material the better, form fitting (not talking total bodycon here, it is work after all, lol, just more fitted thru the hips) even better. Longer lengths, maxis are great too.

Dresses = oddly enough, A line, skater, flowy, waist defining (with more of a free flowingthru hips to hem), you get the point.
They actually seem to work quite well, I would suggest hose/tights to keep top, tabs/edges of your diaper from catching the material.

Of course any type of spandex, stretchy, tight boy short bottoms or shape wear work wonders too.

And in case you're wondering how one might look under tighter/more form fitting jeans/pants/skirts/ect = I've yet to find myself with any VDL. :)
About all I've noticed is that my butt is a lil bigger, which for someone with no ass like me, which isn't too bad a thing, lol.

I hope that maybe I've put at least one thing you might not have thought of, or at least helped a lil to put your mind at ease about having to wear at work.
I'd be happy to talk more if you want, just PM me :)
Thanks for the advice, I tend to wear knee length skirts everyday. When I am home the dry24/7s are so noticeable. My roommate said she notices it.

I like the dry24s because I can go close to 10 hours without changing them. But if I were to wear to work the costs would increase dramatically. I looked into reusable cloth diapers but information on them is scarce and they seem expensive.

My job is quiet like a library. My co-workers tend to wear headphones most of the day. I am in IT and occasionally have to walk over to their desks top fix issues. Being in such close proximity might hint that i am wearing diapers.

Ugh... I wish I didn't have to deal with this. Yesterday I went to the bathroom 7 times during my 8 hour shift. Then as I was going home I had to run into a McDonald's just to relive myself. The whole day I kept thinking if only I had a diaper on. It really is not fun having to endure the pain of holding it.

I am going to go to another doctor to get a second opinion (well 4th opinion). Each one of them said that there isn't much they can do since I am on a high dose diuretic. Thing is I can't stop that medication as what it treats is far worse than wearing diapers.

Thanks again for the advice!
 

Slomo

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People notice the difference between you being diapered one day and not, but if you we're to switch to a somewhat thin diaper and stay that way for a few months, it's likely nobody will notice after all. After that, you could switch to the confidry and likely still not have others notice. Of course, that thinner diaper won't be able to hold much so you'd probably still have to go to the bathroom a lot.

In that interim you should also look at changing your wardrobe. A smooth single color skirt around your waist will show any seam lines below it (or bulk) too easily. Find a loose fitting skirt or pants that have pleats, seams, and even color differences to it which will help conceal a diaper. Darker colors, especially black, also help hide wet spots from a diaper leak really good too. (When you wear a diaper it's nit if they leak, it a guaranteed when. So be prepared for that too).

Also, pointing it out that you're diapered, and having your your room mate comment on it, is not the same as just discretely wearing a diaper and seeing if a coworker might notice. I've worked in the same quiet office for nearly 14 years. I've also always worn premium diapers due to my urge incontinence and flooding. Of the 20 people I work with, only one knows I'm diapered but only because I told him. Seriously- people do not notice what seems obvious to us. It's only when you make it obvious that they notice.

Regardless of the diaper you go with, I would recommend you also wear a diaper cover. I personally like the Gary Activewear PUL pants. They have a cloth outer cover which muffles any diaper crinkle quite well. The inner pul layer is waterproof and will catch any small leaks before they become noticeable and will also help your realize you've leaked much faster.
 

MandyBear

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900
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  1. Little
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Thanks for the advice, I tend to wear knee length skirts everyday. When I am home the dry24/7s are so noticeable. My roommate said she notices it.

I like the dry24s because I can go close to 10 hours without changing them. But if I were to wear to work the costs would increase dramatically.

Your welcome sweety :)
Where do your skirts usually sit on you? At waist or "high waisted", mid waist or on the hips? loose? clingly? form fitting/tight?
Is this business, business casual, professional, professional casual, casual? LOL ya I know.
Just trying to get an idea of your daily work wardrobe.

And how high, where, do the top of the 24/7s hit? Same height? above or below?
Unless you're a petite lil thing, lol, Im gonna guess & say you wear the Mediums? Which are wider, taller and thicker then the smalls & prob a lil big?
Seems like most companies small is just a tad too small, and the mediums are a bit too big sometimes, another :(

Also, I'm guessing you dress more casual / comfy at home, care a lil less about being noticed too.
Combine that with your roomie already knowing you wear them & well of course she is going to notice them.
Maybe on a day your both home, try wearing one under your normal work clothes to get a feel for it all, judge how everything looks/feels and to see how easily she notices them, even if she is a bit bias already knowing what is underneath.

I wish I could recommend a thinner, less expensive, plastic backed alternative for work.
But it seems most all store brands and depends (very sad over this) have all gone the fabric backed route :(

If you are only dealing with urge & leaks and not full on IC, have you thought about or tried the Goodnites Tru-Fit panties??
The XL panties are a bit snug on me, but not to tight and rather comfortable to wear & I'm a 36-37 hip, Size 5-7, sm/med, lol.

They are cotton panties with a waterproof liner/pouch that holds a somewhat thick, absorbent, yet quite comfortable pad.
The "starter" package contains 2 panties, solid purple, purple with stripes, hope you like purple, lol, and some pads.
Replacement pad packs are sold online, and I think still in some stores like Walmart.
The pads are thick, for pads, but nowhere as thick as a 24/7 :).
 

iam32bit

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Your welcome sweety :)
Where do your skirts usually sit on you? At waist or "high waisted", mid waist or on the hips? loose? clingly? form fitting/tight?
Is this business, business casual, professional, professional casual, casual? LOL ya I know.
Just trying to get an idea of your daily work wardrobe.

And how high, where, do the top of the 24/7s hit? Same height? above or below?
Unless you're a petite lil thing, lol, Im gonna guess & say you wear the Mediums? Which are wider, taller and thicker then the smalls & prob a lil big?
Seems like most companies small is just a tad too small, and the mediums are a bit too big sometimes, another :(

Also, I'm guessing you dress more casual / comfy at home, care a lil less about being noticed too.
Combine that with your roomie already knowing you wear them & well of course she is going to notice them.
Maybe on a day your both home, try wearing one under your normal work clothes to get a feel for it all, judge how everything looks/feels and to see how easily she notices them, even if she is a bit bias already knowing what is underneath.

I wish I could recommend a thinner, less expensive, plastic backed alternative for work.
But it seems most all store brands and depends (very sad over this) have all gone the fabric backed route :(

If you are only dealing with urge & leaks and not full on IC, have you thought about or tried the Goodnites Tru-Fit panties??
The XL panties are a bit snug on me, but not to tight and rather comfortable to wear & I'm a 36-37 hip, Size 5-7, sm/med, lol.

They are cotton panties with a waterproof liner/pouch that holds a somewhat thick, absorbent, yet quite comfortable pad.
The "starter" package contains 2 panties, solid purple, purple with stripes, hope you like purple, lol, and some pads.
Replacement pad packs are sold online, and I think still in some stores like Walmart.
The pads are thick, for pads, but nowhere as thick as a 24/7 :).
I wear skirts that start from my hips down to just above my knee. My boss isn't particular about dress code.

The dry24s are much higher than my skirt. I have never worn them outside the house.

I wore a always discreet to work today as a last resort usage thing. It doesn't do anything to prevent having to go to the bathroom.

Here is a timetable I made so far for today.

11/17/16
2:34AM
7:00AM
7:20AM
8:10AM
9:42AM
10:46AM
11:40AM
1:25PM

I am halfway through the day and already went so much. I was wondering if using a diaper instead of running to the bathroom all the time was a viable solution. Wouldn't that be considered going 24/7?

I don't see how a good night's would help my situation.

Thanks again for your help!

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MandyBear

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I wear skirts that start from my hips down to just above my knee.
The dry24s are much higher than my skirt. I have never worn them outside the house.
I was wondering if using a diaper instead of running to the bathroom all the time was a viable solution.
Wouldn't that be considered going 24/7?

BODYSUITS, lol they are totally a life saver in that situation,
Yes, sadly wearing during the day does tend to limit a girl's wardrobe options, but its not impossible.
Yes, trading in your panties for a diaper during the day would make you a 24/7 wearer.
The goodnite tru-fits would only help you with minor leaks from those sudden urges but you would still be going to the bathroom to go several times a day, but at least they are easier to conceal & change (the pad)

I've been dealing with the same thing, although not as badly as you have it.
 
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