New to incontinence

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chuck said:
change as soon as practical after wetting to prevent diaper rash and leaks.
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So I should change right after I wet even if I haven't wet the whole diaper? Is that what you mean.

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Now I'm really annoyed. I changed but I ended up wetting my bed. F**k you incontinence.
 
matty444 said:
So I should change right after I wet even if I haven't wet the whole diaper? Is that what you mean.

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Now I'm really annoyed. I changed but I ended up wetting my bed. F**k you incontinence.
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Matty, it sounds as if you haven't been fully incontinent for a long time. It does take a while to get to the point where you know and understand your issues well enough to deal with it properly. You don't necessarily need to change immediately after your diaper first gets wet, it will depend on what you are using for diapers, how much you wet, etc. The suggestion to get a number of different diapers to try is worthwhile; you can learn which ones work and which ones don't for your situation.

Here is an example of a snap-crotch shirt (sometimes referred to as a onesie).

While there are a lot of suggestions, understand that each and every one may not be right for you. Your situation is unique to what you deal with, a lot of us may have similar aspects in our dealings, but again, it will depend on individual circumstances. Can you give us some idea of what is causing your incontinence (diagnosis from the doctor)? How long have you been dealing with this? What is your overall life like, etc.? We have people on here who are incontinent with limited mobility, other posts you have made suggest this isn't the case.
 
My brother and I were out biking. I really had to pee. There was a hill I was going down quickly so I could get to the toilet. At the bottom of the hill was sand and I couldn't make the turn at the bottom. I got flung off my bike and ended up getting cuts everywhere. I remember feeling something warm and then realized I was peeing. I tries to stop it but I couldn't. I had a broken arm. I kept wetting myself so I was told I was incontinent. The accident occurred on 09/29/15. Before I was incontinent I had an active life which I'm still trying to do but it seems harder to accomplish with incontinence.
 
That bike accident really hurt. The pain was horrible. My arm is mostly ok now. I don't remember anyone saying how I was made incontinent. Since then I've always worn disposable diapers.

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Is it ok for me to put on my pants over my diaper or should I have something between my pants and diapers?
 
A pair of waterproof plastic pants would help a lot to prevent leaks. Get a few pairs of snap-on and a few of pull-on ones. You can even get some with print on them or various colors if you want. That combined with a onesie will make you less bulky and less obvious that you are wearing a diaper.
 
Diapers will allow pants too fall down easily when nothing is over them.

You're mentality is quite negative towards everything that's going on. By continuously thinking negatively about yourself and things that you can't help. I know you feel helpless, but you are your own road block. Incontinence can be embarrassing to live with, but by managing it correctly, you can live a normal life.

I recommended the snap crotch shirt (onesie) it's not necessarily for babies or ABs. I use it for its purpose of keeping diapers from being exposed at the top of the pants, it keeps the diapers from sagging helping it to stay in place. You can get one to try at XPMedical.com they don't have prints like others have shown. They are plain and sturdy.

Don't let incontinence control your life, don't let the stigma control your life. Don't worry about anyone in public. You'll walk right by them and they most likely won't bat an eye. Right now it's all mental. You have to learn to accept incontinence. The best way to do this is to do everything you've done before. Don't think about the diapers. Go shopping, go out to eat, ride your bike.

Do what makes you happy, because fuck, life throws crap at you, sometimes you cannot get out of the way, it may stain but the stains aren't going anywhere, no matter how hard you scrub. Just say fuck it and move on.
 
Yeah I guess I'm not looking up or happy about it. It's allot to go through but maybe more time will help. I guess I should get back out there and do what I did before my accident.

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Do you think it is because I wore diapers as a dl before my incontinence?
 
sometimes leaks just happen. I end up sleeping in a wet bed a few times a month when my nappy leaks or I wet very heavily. I just accept it as part of being incontinent.
 
matty444 said:
Yeah I guess I'm not looking up or happy about it. It's allot to go through but maybe more time will help. I guess I should get back out there and do what I did before my accident.

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Do you think it is because I wore diapers as a dl before my incontinence?
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You just have to cope the same way you cope as a DL. They both have some of the same stigmas. They have their differences as well. When you ask if it's because of your prior DLism that you're upset? Are you still a DL or up until the accident? The good thing about being a DL before incontinence, is that you know what to buy. You know what products to get that will be the best for you.

I don't know how or how much you've done as a DL. Have you worn in public or around others before (discretely of course)? Have you always bought store brand diapers?

I'm not saying that you should be fine because of you being a DL, but it should help you cope better than a vanilla person.

I cope as a DL by including this side of me in more activities. Not locking myself up in my room away from everything else that I have done while not diapered. I've actually hung out with friends while diapered. I've been to their houses while diapered. They don't know about my DLism. I don't intend them to know. I used to ignore requests from friends or family to hangout, dinners or whatever, because I wanted to wear a diaper. I don't wear 24/7 but I tend to wear for long periods of time. I didn't involve anything else with my DLism like hobbies, work, anything. Then after I had my fill, I felt guilty about ignoring everything else. Keeping two sides separate of me left me depressed. I tried to get rid the urges to wear diapers by masturbating, but it never really curbed it for long and lead to a real problem of doing daily or more. It didn't help with the depression either. Then I said fuck it and started wearing diapers more often and out of my room. I started wearing around others, in public, a little at work. I have a toddler side that likes comes out at times.

It seems when I wear diapers as often as I wanted, I felt happier with myself. I felt less depressed, and overcame the constant, attention demanding urges while not wearing.

Wearing and going on as usual helped me in my own way. Just try not to think about it or embrace it as a part of you. You can try to embrace it as a part of your DLism. Go hangout with your friends, they don't have to know. They most likely won't find out unless you're careless. Winter seasons are easier to wear in discretion, but, summer can be difficult.

I will say it again, onesies are a diapers best friend. Coupled with athletic compression underwear, will keep your diaper hidden, function better, and you'll be more comfortable and confident.

It's all mental now, but once you open that prison door, you'll be fine.
 
I've like only works in the comfort of my own room before my incontinence. I really never got the chance to purchase any diapers except store brand until now. I guess the only difference now is that I can't choose not to wear when I want and that I can't control my bladder anymore. I feel like I'm too young to be dealing with this problem. It seems in some aspects to be a steep learning curve.
 
Matty, if your accident was just at the end of September, then you really haven't had much time dealing with it to learn how to deal with this issue. I would certainly make sure a doctor can give you a diagnosis on why you are incontinent, some times it can be something simple to treat, or it may be something that needs to be dealt with or other issues could crop up.

The biggest thing is that you don't let incontinence control your life--your desire to get back out there and get back into life is the best thing you can do. Again, take advice that you get from others about dealing with it with the understanding that your situation isn't always the same. As time goes by, you will learn what works best for you and how to deal with the daily ins and outs of it. We'll be here for support if you need it, we understand it sucks and there's a lot of difficulties that go along with it.
 
What kind of work do you do for a living?
 
I go to a farm several times a week and work at a bookstore.
 
Sorry your stuck for now with this. Nerve damage from MS is the root source of my difficulties, hopefully not yours. The reflex to pee when cold air hits goes back to birth.

When changing real babies, especially boys, a technique that works well is to lift the front of the diaper enough to trigger the reflex then drop it back in place for a moment. The diaper catches the squirt then you have time to complete the diaper change safely.

It works the same for me. When I get changed by experienced others, they employ the same technique.

Nerve damage from accidents can sometimes be reversed if caught early.
Only a medical professional can help with diagnosing your root cause. I hate MS, it's so troubling. I want control over my incontinence. I have to learn to deal with random issues like control over which ever body part is malfunctioning today.

Rant over.
 
Thanks. How early does nerve damage need to caught to have a possible reverse? What does MS stand for?

I'll try lifting my diaper up to start the reflex and then put on a clean diaper.

I hope that everyone who replied is ok with all of my questions. Thank you. Matty444
 
MS is short for multiple sclerosis. Where the immune system attacks the myelin insulation around nerves in the central nervous system.
 
matty444 said:
How early does nerve damage need to caught to have a possible reverse?
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There is no telling without knowing the cause but the earlier the better.
 
The lifting diaper technique works well. I never ended up peeing on other objects yesterday with each diaper change.

I was embarrassed yesterday. My friends came over and we just stayed at home. My friends already know about my incontinence and need for diapers. One of my friends noticed I leaked before I noticed. They started teasing me like look baby boy Matt soaked his diaper and leaked. He needs a diaper change. I was embarrassed. I got up and rushed off or change into a clean diaper and get dry pants. I hated it. What can I do to avoid it in future?
 
Get some cloth diapers and plastic pants, or change your disposable more frequently or try adding a pair of plastic pants over your disposable.
 
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