Need help overcoming shame of uncontrollable bm's

[Racingmatt550]

I need advise from the other incontinent people in this forum about fear of having bowel accidents in public view when you can't sense or stop it from coming out. I've been urinary incontinent for about a year now and now I've developed bowel incontinence and I don't wanna get constipated from being humiliated for not being able to sense,control my bowels due to my neurogenic bladder/bowels that comes from being autistic with SPD from birth. I just wanna be able to make sure I can "let it ALL OUT" without being ashamed of it so I don't become "backed up". Sorry if I'm talking in circles and boring people with the long post.

 

[KittyMerriweather]

From what I have read on this forum, there are specialist you can talk to that will help you with an evacuation plan. I have seen people say fecal incontinence doesnt have to mean daily messing accidents.

You will get the help you need here. Good luck.

 

[Racingmatt550]

From what I have read on this forum, there are specialist you can talk to that will help you with an evacuation plan. I have seen people say fecal incontinence doesnt have to mean daily messing accidents.

You will get the help you need here. Good luck.

Evacuation plan?

 

[KittyMerriweather]

Evacuation plan?

Yes. Apparently they coach you and come up with plans to help eliminate your waste. This site has wonderful users. You came to the right place.

 

[checkingoutall]

Yes there are ways to help you deal with this so that your chance of messing while out is greatly reduced. Some of this may be doing an enema at night and or in the morning. Watching what foods you eat that might cause you to have bm accidents. Methods to make you go like sticking your finger in the anus and doing circles right inside to stimulate the bowel to open up at that time. These are just a few things and with the right training and or help from some doctors/coaches in this area, your messy accidents won't be much of a concern when you are out and about.

As for you fear of this happening, I totally understand and feel that fear as well. So far I have been able to control it to where it has only happened when I was driving home or just leaving a place and heading home after that. The part about being backed up is a real concern too. Do to a lot of medications I am on right now for a surgery I had in Dec and am still recovering from, they cause lots of contstipation. I wasn't paying attention to when I had my last bm and things got really packed in there, so it wasn't fun, but had to dig some of it out and take several enemas in a row to soften it up so it would come out. I never have the feeling of needing to go even though I pass gas, so I have to manage my bm's.

Don't let this stop you from living. When out, and you are concerned about bm's, wear good diapers like Megamax and others that have bowel odor control, and I would keep with you a small spray bottle of VIP Poo or something like that so if it does happen, you can spray a little in the back side to help mask any smell. Life is to short to let our pipes stop us from living and having fun.

 

[Minih]

First of all, talk to a doctor about it. But there are several things that can help:

1. If part of the problem is loose stools/diarrhoea, then using a bit of immodium will help firm things up and make accidents less likely. My bowels are about as reliable as the British weather, and a fixed dose of immodium is just as likely to have no effect as it is to bung me up for three days, adjusting the dosage means that it's possible for me to get through a week without accidents on occasion.
2. It's possible to train your bowel by going to the loo at particular points during the day have having/trying to have a crap - it's not perfect, but it does help. A few things that were suggested to me to try to get things out in the morning before I left the house for work were having a hot shower and eating breakfast, both of which stimuate the bowel. I've also been advised to give myself plenty of time on the toilet too (I always did anyway, but it might be useful for you), and to use a foot stool to raise your knees higher than your crotch when sitting on the loo.
3. If you've got SPD issues, this might not help - but Renew Inserts give me a bit more warning that I need a crap than I'd otherwise get. It's not much warning, but the extra time can be enough to get me to a toilet.
4. Nappies will help - but it took me a while to get used to crapping myself in public - and it's still something I'd rather doesn't happen. But getting on with life and doing the things you enjoy regardless is much better than sitting at home feeling grumpy that you aren't going out. Plastic pants over the top can help with keeping smells in and in case of any poo explosions.
5. Anal irrigation (fancy enemas) can help evacuate everything and prevent major accidents. Not tried it, but I'm considering it.

 

[sport1]

I've been urine incontinent for yrs but sometimes have had bowel accidents and yes.I've read where anal irrigation can help.

 

[jdinvirginia]

Hi all,

I am double incontinent and for years have managed my bowel incontinence fairly effectively with daily morning enemas. I have self-administered over 5,300 traditional (old-fashioned) soapsuds enemas from a hanging rubber bag. An empty bowel cannot have an accident. After taking an enema you usually can go about your day and forget (almost) about having a bowel accident.

More recently, my physician prescribed the Coloplast Peristeen Rectal Irrigation System. These are just what Minih calls "fancy enemas" but Coloplast calls them "irrigations." The difference is that the Peristeen system uses a disposable rectal catheter (enema nozzle) with an inflatable cuff (balloon). Once the catheter is inserted, the balloon is inflated to help one retain the enema - making it fully effective. The system is appropriate for people who have neurogenic bowel due to nerve damage (usually trauma to the spine or pelvis from an accident).

The system is very pricyand you need insurance to cover the cost but it works incredibly well. I only recently began using the system but I have not had a single bowel accident in 87 days since I began using it! That's right, none, zero, zip, nada.

Any one serious about it can send me a PM.

--John

 

[Teddy]

Just as an aside, the Japanese got it right. I bought a electric bidet, and it's made cleaning my bum out incredibly easy with it's enema function. It irrigates with temp adjustable warm water, then washes and blow dries. Aside from the huge savings in TP, it's been a life changer for me.

 

[sport1]

Hi all,

I am double incontinent and for years have managed my bowel incontinence fairly effectively with daily morning enemas. I have self-administered over 5,300 traditional (old-fashioned) soapsuds enemas from a hanging rubber bag. An empty bowel cannot have an accident. After taking an enema you usually can go about your day and forget (almost) about having a bowel accident.

More recently, my physician prescribed the Coloplast Peristeen Rectal Irrigation System. These are just what Minih calls "fancy enemas" but Coloplast calls them "irrigations." The difference is that the Peristeen system uses a disposable rectal catheter (enema nozzle) with an inflatable cuff (balloon). Once the catheter is inserted, the balloon is inflated to help one retain the enema - making it fully effective. The system is appropriate for people who have neurogenic bowel due to nerve damage (usually trauma to the spine or pelvis from an accident).

The system is very pricyand you need insurance to cover the cost but it works incredibly well. I only recently began using the system but I have not had a single bowel accident in 87 days since I began using it! That's right, none, zero, zip, nada.

Any one serious about it can send me a PM.

--John

I also have ibs d/c and have had accidents.The system you talked about sounds nice but you said pricy.Thanks for the info.