Info, please… do I just give in?

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Prudence

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Sine late teens, always had a need to know where every bathroom was. From college to adulthood, constantly used restrooms when I could ( almost hourly) . Have had multiple years retirement, urges to get to toilet more often. *** No MD finds an issue** . I’m told “ just hold it, stretch bladder ( it’s very small, confirmed w/ sonogram and during an abdominal surgery) . So, do I say “ screw it, use a diaper?” I can hold fecal continence, always have. This is urinary.
 
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Prudence said:
Sine late teens, always had a need to know where every bathroom was. From college to adulthood, constantly used restrooms when I could ( almost hourly) . Have had multiple years retirement, urges to get to toilet more often. *** No MD finds an issue** . I’m told “ just hold it, stretch bladder ( it’s very small, confirmed w/ sonogram and during an abdominal surgery) . So, do I say “ screw it, use a diaper?” I can hold fecal continence, always have. This is urinary.
Well, I feel your pain. I run to the toilet often. Now I have good days and bad days. On good days I visit the restroom every 45-60 mins. On bad days I can't hold at all. And anything in between. Recently, I sometimes wear on "good days" too, simply because I know I'll have a 3-hour-long meeting and don't want to excuse myself 3-4 times. Or on long car trips. We cannot decide for you though. You have to make this decision for yourself. We can only share our stories and experiences.
 
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I guess that's a matter of personal preference. I fight hard to keep what little control I have left. I like to minimize the number of changes, number of diapers, and damage to my skin. Some days it is so tempting to just give in but when I do it does certainly make the issue worse over time.
 
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Every time I give in, I hear that "ch-ching" of the ca$h register in the background.
 
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Prudence said:
Sine late teens, always had a need to know where every bathroom was. From college to adulthood, constantly used restrooms when I could ( almost hourly) . Have had multiple years retirement, urges to get to toilet more often. *** No MD finds an issue** . I’m told “ just hold it, stretch bladder ( it’s very small, confirmed w/ sonogram and during an abdominal surgery) . So, do I say “ screw it, use a diaper?” I can hold fecal continence, always have. This is urinary.
I have a combined dribble- and urge incontinence, for me also only bladder is affected and I don't use my diapers for #2. At the beginning of my IC I tried to use as much as possible the toilet, only wearing pull-up style protection (which I often had to change). After a short time I recognized that I was more concentrating on managing my (in)continence than living my normal, active life as I did before being IC and I started to really accept my condition, switched to a more proper protection, allowing myself using it instead of every time trying to run (often unsuccessfully) to the bathroom. This improved my quality of life significantly. And this is mainly what's all about - If you are more happy keeping the level continence you have under all circumstances, just wear thin pull-ups as "just in case" protection, if you want to get rid of the duty to solely plan your life around bathrooms then give better protection a try and accept that it is sometimes much more convenient to live your life and use it!
 
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You can always experiment with different things to see what works for you. I went through something similar. My bladder is very inconsistent, which can lead to urge incontinence and unpredictable urgency. The ongoing frustration was terrible. Over time I had developed all sorts of methods to deal with it, which included having to dehydrate myself before leaving the house, knowing where every single bathroom in town was, and being prepared for emergencies.

For me the pandemic was the final push I needed to start wearing higher capacity protection. After having the occasional wet days when I wasn't able to get to a bathroom in time, I realized how much of a load it took off of me. So that's when I gave in and let myself go completely wet during the day. I hardly think about it much now. I feel it happen, I stay comfortable, and continue with what I'm doing.
 
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Thanks all
 
Hello, there are many diaper options that work wonderfully.
Urge incontinence is very stressfull.
Tabbed diapers should help you manage it effectively, such as Betterdry, Mega max, Xp5000, just to name a few good brands.
 
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I gave up the fight with my bladder 10 years ago and have been in nappies ever since.
 
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Its been 9 years for me I decided to give up the fight I was loosing when I was not making it to the bathroom in time, once I started to wear 24/7 and simply use my diaper my limited remaining control quickly disappeared. I have no regrets as it just was not worth the stress of am I going to make it.
Being diapered 24/7 had not changed my daily life all that much I just dont go swimming any more but haven’t missed it any ways :) Acceptance you have a medical issue is important as it makes it easier to decide to wear 24/7 and the peace of mind knowing your protected and your pants will stay dry makes it easier in the long run and people really cant tell your wearing a diaper unless you wear really tight pants.

Pants one size up and a plain coloured onesie help hide your diaper :)
 
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