Incontinent, is there any time you hate wearing nappies?

toddler

I love wearing cloth nappies and plastic pants.
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For me I started wearing nappies again back in 1999. I never hated wearing nappies. because I lost control of my bladder. urinary incontinence is caused by a bulging disc. I do not hate wearing nappies. I happy to wear them. I wear old shool cloth nappies and plastic pants and also modern cloth nappies.
 
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Jorelaxed

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At first when my I/C started, I did dread wearing them, but as time went by, I adapted and got comfortable wearing them.
I like them because they help me, gave me back my confidence and make me feel good overall.😃😃
 
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parcelboy2

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No as I was a DL before becoming IC ,
Better padded than wetting my pants
 
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Jr2012

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No I love my diapers and plastic pants and having to wear them all the time
 
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Wetshisbed

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I have worn nappies for over 10 years now and don't see it as a big deal.
 
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ParaRomeo

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I do want to preference my response with I don't want this to come out as me vs them or something negative but more as a food for thought or potential different view.

I do think it depends on the person and their background among many other factors, as well as cause of IC like technically speaking an involuntary loss of control can be considered being IC. Like if someone becomes diaper dependent(chose to wear or forced which has various levels like there are many older people that go to an unskilled home after surgery where they are diapered for "safety reasons" and if not caught or treated they can loose control) vs injury,, disability, or other causes could lead to different feelings or thoughts about them, also I do believe everyone handles situation differently.

Also like if someone has always been in them all their life they may not know any difference or this can go numerous directions but there are some who were into abdl stuff than became IC and some are happy with it like a dream came true but there are some that dreamt it then had regrets because it can effect ones life.

In my case though I basically asked to use them it was out of medical needs or risk vs benefit. For me cathing made me sick & at times very sick(like in the ICU) & in a messed up way I was fortunate with my cord injury I didn't have a retention issue as alot do. I also refused to get a colostomy because of the potential infection risks, not only with surgery but even risks afterwards. But even though I requested it because of the medical position I was in, mentally it didn't make it easier especially for first couple yrs or before I was totally independent with care or independent enough where I didn't require full-time help. For me it was demeaning in a way because not only did I have no feeling or sensation so I didn't know when I went and mentally that was another blow because if I didn't check I had nurses and aids that checked either way then having to wait for their help. But my background is very different than some, like I bought my first house in my mid 20's & was fully independent up till my injury the type A or Alpha personality also didn't help(I do understand there are non-ic abdl's that do or have done similar jobs as I did but they got a choice in the matter). I will mention once I was introduced to and found quality products my quality of life improved and for the most part I have accepted that part of my injury but it's like being paralyzed I still have bad days or days where my injuries/disabilities do wear on me and I do miss doing somethings or having ability. I get my situation is compounded by being paralyzed so like yesterday I had an event to go to I had to be there at 5pm but had to run few errands beforehand so it takes alot of planning(like getting my wheelchair in & out of truck takes time so I can't simply run quick errands so have to factor that in) and depending where I am going it may take time to research things like accessibility and facilities. Though I did wear a higher cap diaper I knew it wasn't to last for the whole event b/c I had to get dressed earlier and leave sooner & because I can't just stand, I needed to come up with a plan to change(which is something I have to do or keep in mind whenever I am not home) or leave early which is totally different from someone without mobility issues or simply stand in a stall, fortunately for me I was able to park indoors and was able to use back floor of my truck but I had to sneak around, which there are times where I feel like I am living a double life(some friends know but not everyone).

For the most part I am financially stable and I am not worrying about where products are coming from though I still have medical expenditures but I have had times where I was wearing case to case and even though I might of known what works like higher cap diapers like I wore yesterday I had times those special use products were to expensive which did effect how or what I did, also had times I had to get products through organizations, mentally for me asking for help sometimes feels like a kick in the teeth and times where I wish I didn't have to deal with it.

Lastly and I don't want it to sound like I am blaming everything on one thing or another like I do deal with stress, depression, situational depression, pts and sometimes anxiety but usually a lot of these are amplified by having a complex medical history. So like I had some medical issues before my cord injury and I have had my share of starting over or having to relearn things or learn them a different way, like I have a TBI, post concussion syndrome (few other terms sorry couldn't afford a stunt double after blowing lots of money of crap I can't remember) But I was exposed to Covid at work in late 2020 which almost killed me and I still deal with side effects from it like though I am a lot better than 10sec Tom I legit have to set alarms & reminders on my phone to remember to do basic tasks like changing, to daily life tasks, or like I require oxygen at night and forget to turn machines on before transfering into bed. But the simple tasks like when did I last wash up, do I need to change, did I eat today there are things I bet some take for granted or do without thinking & this is not a poor me F that but it does get depressing and or stressful at my age when I forget to check to see if I need to change or go to change and not need to or realize I forgot my diaper bag(fortunately I do leave a emergency kit in the truck but that's another reminder to restock both) shit I can't tell you how many times even with a list I buy stuff that I don't need I have many jars of PB&J even though I buy frozen premade ones.

I have been asked if I have one thing fixed what would it be or which would I choose and though it sounds like an easy choice but for some reason God has put me on this path for a reason(still think he is mad at me at times) and in my background or line of work there isn't do overs & there really isn't them in life but you can learn and try to do better, push on & be a good human, life can suck, everyone has there own worse day, you can be a puddle or an ocean, people stomp through puddles while oceans can take out cities or I am like a roll of TP I am either on a roll(and depending how it's hung it can be right or wrong) or I am dealing with crap.

For everything I have or deal with each has ups and downs
 
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Rita

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Just when I can't change when I need or want to !!
 
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wetnappyjon

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My IC is for the same reason - disc problems despite surgery x3. But I ws ABDL before so I've really embraced wearing nappies 24/7 and wouldn't have it any other way. But I can see that if you have other disabilities such as a spinal cord injury with paralysis the accumulation of problems to include being IC would be really bad so my sympathies for #ParaRomeo
 
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EcoIncon

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Hate wearing diapers? I guess when I first had to I hated it.

I've accepted it now and diapers are just a tool to help me live a full life. Can you hate using a tool?

I still hate the laundry, would rather spend my money on something else, occasionally hate the wetness/changing in public/etc. More than hating wearing diapers kinda like @ParaRomeo its the health implications I don't love.
 
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Jr2012

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EcoIncon said:
Hate wearing diapers? I guess when I first had to I hated it.

I've accepted it now and diapers are just a tool to help me live a full life. Can you hate using a tool?

I still hate the laundry, would rather spend my money on something else, occasionally hate the wetness/changing in public/etc. More than hating wearing diapers kinda like @ParaRomeo its the health implications I don't love.
Yes I’m also fully incontinent and actually really love my diapers and plastic pants and also that I have to wear them all the time 😎❤️🧷
 
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dpcare

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There are times changing can be really inconvenient such as being ill or tired otherwise diapers are ,y normal daily underwear
 
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slimjiminy

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I have been continent until the pandemic (in my mid 60s). Then I discovered that I have have become IC due to nerve damage, caused by long time with type-2 diabetes. This has forced me into almost all aspects of diapers since I sometimes have been F-IC (IBS-d) in addition to U-IC.

I am grateful that choices exist today, and they sound pretty good now compared to say 1980s.

But I would be very happy if the whole problem went away, including the nocturnal enuresis.
 
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Lukas

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Fortunately for me I was part of the AB/DL community before my digestive issues hit and I gave up and started wearing diapers full time.

Overall it doesn't bother me too much having to wear them, however any time I have an accident I get flustered and depressed. Still it beats changing clothes. I will say I have been lazy withy bladder since I have been wearing diapers full time for the last 2 years and my control is definitely diminished, however this bothers me far less than the fecal incontinence.
 
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ParaRomeo

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Rita said:
Just when I can't change when I need or want to !!
I wanted to let you know the angry emoji wasn't at you it's at that situation and one of my frustrations.
wetnappyjon said:
But I can see that if you have other disabilities such as a spinal cord injury with paralysis the accumulation of problems to include being IC would be really bad so my sympathies for #ParaRomeo
I appreciate it & honestly I put it out there more for what I call food for thought or a possible way to understand me or the way I look at a situation. But I have times where wearing doesn't bother me or I try to find positives because it's usually easier to find negatives. Though I don't identify as an ab or dl or any of the others, I have more of an appreciation for diapers or as #slimjimmy mentioned I appreciate what's available now vs before. I get I don't have a choice in the matter so I do try to let it not bother me and it's like being changed there is difference between wanting and needing, so like I appreciate the help but it's hard to accept and or ask for help even when needed, though different it's like yard work I finally accepted its something I struggled with & had to ask for help which free's up time for other things and one less worry or stress over, the similarity though I stopped in home care for now but an aid could fully dress & change me way quicker like some days it can take over an hour to get dressed and changed (even a wet diaper can take me up to 20mins but the aid did it in 5min @7x/day it's 140mins vs 35mins and I could do a lot with an extra hr/day), but part is pride and positive feeling of being independent but I am realizing it's ok to ask or get help time to time. A person on YouTube Khuck used to say "happiness is a choice so choose wisely"
EcoIncon said:
I've accepted it now and diapers are just a tool to help me live a full life. Can you hate using a tool?
Though I do agree with it's a useful tool & one that I don't think is often thought of or used by providers though there has been some change alot view diapers like last resort most don't take quality of life or risk vs benefits into account unless it's mentioned and sometimes you need to advocate for yourself, I have it somewhere but I had a urologist write something like normally diapers shouldn't be used but in the case of this of pt he has a valid point and I recommend he use diapers over other options (I mentioned it because that report has come up b/c that doc was well respected so some are like if he recommends them). Also I couldn't agree with you more once I learned of quality diapers it changed my life and quality of it also life was so much better. Though I do hate the tool at times I do know I don't have other options and I think some hate could be from lack of knowledge or understanding. Like most docs can give you examples of various caths, meds, surgical options but you ask for recommendations on diapers and usually most don't know & I get there are so many choices but their knowledge is usually slim to none. It's like though I am not as active as in was pre-covid I do still volunteer as a peer mentor and advocate and it happens alot with special needs kids as well when they out grow baby diapers unless someone helps them there really isn't much unbiased help(not always a negative but like a company will advocate for their products vs this is what's out there and these are pro & con of each) though someone can correct me from what I have read in the UK a continence nurse will educate & has some knowledge on alot of tools including absorbent products where in the US same title but mainly for teaching meds and caths, I did have one that gave me some info on cloth diapers but it was from her using them on her kids which some can be used and will say that's another part of the tool box which is often self taught or hard to get info on without help. So it's not really a hate of the tool itself it's how to choose the right tool and learning a out them is where I see the issue is and I will give credit to the abdl crowd if it wasn't for them I don't think the offering would be the same which I can almost prove when I first got hurt the best available was Molicare or more available, Abena wasn't as easy to get.
 
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Raven801

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Um yeah IC here been in and out of diapers for most my life honestly sometimes I'd be angry at the world and others I'd be happy in my nappy. Been a rollercoaster of emotion.
Since things took a turn for the worse 3 years ago I've been 24-7 it was tuff at first now I'm getting used to it but from time to time I still struggle yet if I was magically healed of everything tomorrow....I think there would be t ones I actually missed my diapers......it's freekin weird guess you always think the grass is greener on the other side....and that pertains to diapers and underwear LoL. In truth if I was healed tomorrow I think I'd be very tempted or would wear on some occasions....first scuba diving in my new dry suit ... really don't want to cut a hole for a p vavle never had super good luck with em anyways , long movies, long drives, and to bed sometimes because I definitely don't miss getting up 8 times a night to go pee, and when sick ....so nice to lay In Bed and not struggle to get up constantly....I'm sure I could name a few more but you get the idea .....I would give just about anything for diapers to be a choice instead of required.
 
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Edgewater

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With nearing five decades of U-IC as a result of a car crash and the joy of a caring loving wife, my long life of wearing diapers is something that I had long ago come to accept and have lived a full and happy life.

One thing I would change, yes not being U-IC.
But, zero reason to spending anytime on that hope /wish as it is what it is and life has long ago moved on1
 
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greatlake5

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Edgewater said:
One thing I would change, yes not being U-IC.
But, zero reason to spending anytime on that hope /wish as it is what it is and life has long ago moved on1
Sometimes I fantasized about not being IC. But hating it? Not really. Moved on when I got older. I suppose most longtime IC individuals have accepted from wearing a diaper. IC complicates our lives but being diaper dependent doesn't define me.
 
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AnalogRTO

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greatlake5 said:
Sometimes I fantasized about not being IC. But hating it? Not really. Moved on when I got older. I suppose most longtime IC individuals have accepted from wearing a diaper. IC complicates our lives but being diaper dependent doesn't define me.
Well said. One of the hardest things for some people is accepting that they don't fit the definition of 'normal' and because of that they don't want to put themselves in a situation where someone might find out. So many people who have been continent their whole life suddenly become shut-ins when they find themselves dealing with IC.

Me? I've long celebrated the fact that I'm not like everyone else. I may not celebrate my IC, but the fact I like different things from most people helps set me apart. The art in my home? Dr. Seuss! My recreational sports? Skydiving and SCUBA diving. Even my job is in a niche part of electronics design. Does having a diaper on really limit me in doing things I want to? I've gone bungee jumping with a diaper under my clothes!
 
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Angelapinks

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Edgewater said:
With nearing five decades of U-IC as a result of a car crash and the joy of a caring loving wife, my long life of wearing diapers is something that I had long ago come to accept and have lived a full and happy life.

One thing I would change, yes not being U-IC.
But, zero reason to spending anytime on that hope /wish as it is what it is and life has long ago moved on1
Now that I need to wear due to back injuries and OAB, I sometimes wish I could just go back 20 years and back into my panties again. I had been wearing panties since I was very young and had quite a collection of pretty ones I loved. My night time accidents and no real treatment to stop them resulted in a night diaper that I have grown to love. Sort of in that I feel relaxed knowing I won't wet the bed and usually get a good nights sleep. During Covid with bathrooms closed, my daily routine became a pull on for trips away from home, like groceries and appointments etc. and most of the time I make it home dry but sometimes I don't. I think this just limits my trips now as I can't get used to wearing in public and my family has not said anything yet but without a coat or long sweater it is going to be more noticable in the future.
 
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NannaAnnabelle

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My turn-offs to wearing are warm weather and making sure I'm adequately cleaning between changes. That is a major time sink. Other than that I'm mostly comfortable with wearing diapers.
 
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