I'm Running an Experiment on ABDLMatch (so you don't have to)

ADDSchoolboy

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So a few weeks ago I made an account on ABDLMatch (without really doing any research) because I thought why not give it a shot. Since then I've read what people have said about it being a complete scam designed to extract money from desperate people. I've also received a couple of notices that people had messaged me on there, which of course I have to pay to be able to read. The first one I ignored because it seemed fake, which honestly kind of confirmed what people had been saying. The second message though was better, so I decided to bite. I'll go over what I've done in this thread, and provide updates on my findings.

1. Using https://www.privacy.com/ I create a disposable credit card with a $10 limit that was set to expire immediately after the first use. I purchased the 3-Day Silver trial. If this message turns out to be a scam (which it probably will), they won't see another dime, not even a first month "oopsy you forgot to cancel" $29 charge.

2. I read and replied to the message. I also looked at the profile of the user who sent it. Turns out a sexy older woman from my city wants to get into ABDL and has already bought diapers and everything. Of course, her message to me was so generic that it could really appeal to anyone, and since my profile doesn't have any information, I could take it to mean anything from "I want to try this to spice things up in the bedroom." to "24/7 Total Power Exchange Diaper Slave with Contract".

3. I posed 3 simple questions in my message. These questions were designed to be the types of questions that literally anyone from my city could answer immediately, and if they couldn't answer them then they're really not someone I would be interested in anyway, even if they were real. On the other hand, it is extremely unlikely that a bot or even an actor or actress would be able to guess the answers:

1. What is a major landmark our city is famous for? (My city has an extremely famous landmark, and if you live here and don't know what it is, then you're too ignorant to even have a conversation with, much less pursue a relationship.)
2. What is the name of a major roadway (any major roadway) that goes through our area? (Anyone who has ever had to drive or navigate in this city could easily throw up many correct answers to this one.)

The problem with the first two is that a staff member arguably could get those answers using Google and 5 minutes of research. Those questions were mostly designed to defeat bots and increase the cost of any actor/actress. That brings me to the last question:

3. There is also a really really huge gas station on the way to the next major city that is pretty famous and as a particular mascot, can you tell me the name of the store or the mascot? (This question is vague enough that you probably can't just use Google to figure it out. On the other hand, it's also a pretty well known place, and this person claims to be a real estate agent, so this one is also easy for a real person to answer in my opinion.)

UPDATE:
I actually got a reply! I considered this possibility far less likely than simply hearing nothing at all, so at least we know it's not a bot. Or that at least an actor or staff member takes over when they get a response.

They were offended that I would question whether they were real, and suggested that if I had doubts I should never have joined the site, and said that my distrust is a turn off to many people. They also said that "for the record, I'm not going to answer your questions." they "don't want to fall for your (my) trap." because "it makes me (them) look stupid".

Ya right. It's only a trap if you're an actor and not a real person from my area. I think they gave themselves away with that line.

I replied to their reply. I apologized that I had offended them and explained that ABDLMatch has a terrible reputation within the ABDL community, and it was the site I distrusted and not them. I explained that people like them are very rare to find, and that I would love to talk to them more. I then insisted that they needed to answer the questions in order for me to be able to verify them. We'll see what happens next.

====================
By the way folks, I just wanted to take this time to point something out for all our younger, newer and especially less assertive folks. A PERSON GETTING OFFENDED THAT YOU WANT TO VERIFY WHAT THEY TELL YOU IS PREDATORY BEHAVIOR AND A HUGE RED FLAG. Do not be swayed by this attempt to distract you, because that's exactly what it is, an attempt to distract you.
====================

My predictions are as follows, from most to least likely:
1) I get another generic message claiming to be offended that I dare question whether they are real.
2) I receive no further replies at all (a good scam artist won't waste time on someone who isn't going to be a good mark).
3) I get clearly made up or otherwise non-convincing answers to the questions. (seems less likely unless they aren't very smart or are extremely desperate for customers)
4) I get correct or reasonable answers to my questions, and we continue to have a conversation. (I'm not holding my breath).

If #1 or #3 happens, I'm going to respond and give ABDLMatch a piece of my mind. Preying on people's desperation and insecurities to extract money from them in a recurring fashion is despicable. The 3-Day trial will expire, and any further charges to the card will be declined because it expired as soon as I made the initial $3 purchase. I will then contact tech support and have them delete my account.

If #2 happens, I will let the trial expire and then contact tech support and have them delete my account.

If #4 happens, I will immediately try to find a way to connect with this person on another platform that doesn't charge for the privilege.

I'll keep you guys posted.
 
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ElPulpo

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I'll keep you guys posted.
Thank you, I find it very interesting, as I'm too skeptical to even waste $10 on that experiment.
If #1 or #3 happens, I'm going to respond and give ABDLMatch a piece of my mind. Preying on people's desperation and insecurities to extract money from them in a recurring fashion is despicable.
It is, but don't expect humanity to change because of you complaining.
 
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Lilpampy19

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I had a profile on ABDLmatch for 2 years. For me it was most definitely a scam and not worth the waste of my time. First thing was that you had to pay to even just read messages that someone sent you. Second thing is that anyone I "talked" two wouldn't answer most of my questions, which were interesting topics to try and learn about each other. They would also take days and even weeks to reply and ignore most of my questions if not all and just ask a real simple generic answer. I no longer use that site and most of the messages to me were people looking to have sex or something that I just was not interested since I didn't know them. I certainly hope that you have better luck with it, but for me it was a complete waste. Other people I've talked to about also said they're experience was not much better if not worse. I truly hope you have better luck with it. Out of curiousity I'll check the inbox to see if anyone's messaged but it's still empty. I will never again pay just to read someone's message that they want to have sex or do something else i'm not interested in.
 

mistysummers

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I feel most dating sites that target 1 thing are scams, ive seen anime dating sits brony dating sites, kink dating sites and after a little research all were scams filled with bots
 

MissAmy

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If #1 or #3 happens, I'm going to respond and give ABDLMatch a piece of my mind.
yea, give it to them! those scammers will definitely learn their lesson and realize it's wrong to accept money from dumb people.

what else did you expect? girls in the abdl world have no need or reason for using dating sites. it's simple supply and demand: there's a low demand and endless supply of potential male partners who'd often be satisfied even with a young grandma as their partner. then there's an endless demand and scarce supply of female partners who can choose anyone they desire from that overflowing pool of desperate males. think!!! i could write a post here saying i need a daddy, go to a chatroom, go to any other forum or place where abdls hang out and by the end of the day, i'd have a whole list of either potential partners or, more realistically, potential money dispensers. think logically, no girl online will ever approach some random guy with intents to date him. trust me. seriously, trust me on this. i know how this works, i had a lot of opportunities to squeeze money out of desperate people. i could've been rich if i actually went through with all those scams
 
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Grendale

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yea, give it to them! those scammers will definitely learn their lesson and realize it's wrong to accept money from dumb people.

what else did you expect? girls in the abdl world have no need or reason for using dating sites. it's simple supply and demand: there's a low demand and endless supply of potential male partners who'd often be satisfied even with a young grandma as their partner. then there's an endless demand and scarce supply of female partners who can choose anyone they desire from that overflowing pool of desperate males. think!!! i could write a post here saying i need a daddy, go to a chatroom, go to any other forum or place where abdls hang out and by the end of the day, i'd have a whole list of either potential partners or, more realistically, potential money dispensers. think logically, no girl online will ever approach some random guy with intents to date him. trust me. seriously, trust me on this. i know how this works, i had a lot of opportunities to squeeze money out of desperate people. i could've been rich if i actually went through with all those scams
This is very true, but the females I have spoken to in this lifestyle usually end up with this problem:
Desperate people make for poor lovers.
I dont think anyone has an easy time dating with this psychology.
 

Grendale

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poor lovers but excellent cashpigs. that's the only reason why guys might get messaged by a girl
So true. Many smart people have made themselves successful and wealthy off of desperate people. It's not the only reason though. Some girls I have run across on discord or tumblr reach out as crys for help. Desperate people attract wolves and more desperate people.
 
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woolyDL

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I too have questioned the legitimacy of this site. I have an account and get regular messages from 'matches'. Having not paid i cannot gain access to read the said messages to see what direct message they say.

I've read their profile when they state they are in a certain country, occasionally the UK and looked on the photos posted. Looking in the background reveals certain country specific details like appliances that aren't common in the UK, American style cookers or better still non-UK plug sockets (power outlets) are a dead give away to fraudulent claims.
 

BabyDavidMessiah

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When I first started looking I went on this site and I hate to say I fell for it. HARD. I don't know that the site is a scam but, definitely scammers get on sites like that. I gotta say I'm actually shocked she claims to be from your own city.
 

sbmccue

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I've got my money (pardon the pun) on #2 ... I don't think you'll hear back from this one.

I wouldn't be surprised, however, if you hear from someone else who is also supposed to be nearby. As Woolybobs noted, the photos are often dead giveaways.

All this didn't start with ABDLMatch, of course. Back in the late 1980s, there was an AB clothing manufacturer called 'ABC' that was supposedly run by three women - one of whom was a practicing AB, another a mommy to her AB husband, and a third who kept her entire family in diapers. The odds against such a revelatory relationship in pre-internet days boggle the imagination. Many ABs bought clothes from them just to receive notes and stories from these 'ladies.'
 

Ereid2k19

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Wow, this is a really well written post and great experiment. I've seen something on reddit about how those "Hot girl near you" ads on porn sites work(from the actual workers themselves) and it sounds kind of similar. Basically, the girls you talk to only have the goal of getting you to talk for as long as possible without committing to a real meetup, so they'll push it back or be as vague as possible about meetups, while attempting to keep you hooked by having real conversation. The agents work shifts and switch off, so they have to keep track of what was said in order to make it seem realistic. They also have a gallery of nudes from one specific girl if asked to send them. I'm fairly certain this site is very similar, especially since you have to pay to view messages.
 

ADDSchoolboy

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Yep, that seems to be exactly what it's like.

One thing I want to clarify from my post though is that the trial cost $3 and not $10. I put a $10 limit on the card just in case to cover fees or whatever. So basically this whole experiment is costing me less than a cup of coffee.

Some folks seem to think I'm foolish for doing this, but I disagree. The problem is that it isn't impossible that someone could legitimately be using the site.

As far as them really not caring whether I give them a piece of my mind I'm not really worried about whether they care or not, that part will be a one way conversation as far as I'm concerned.

Anyway, just under 2 days left on the trial. It took several hours before I got my first reply, and it's been most of the next day already with silence. I'm beginning to think #2 is the most likely scenario, though they might attempt a hail Mary at the last minute to get me to bite. They'll probably say nothing though, because I have them in a corner and they know it.
 

Lilpampy19

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Yep, that seems to be exactly what it's like.

One thing I want to clarify from my post though is that the trial cost $3 and not $10. I put a $10 limit on the card just in case to cover fees or whatever. So basically this whole experiment is costing me less than a cup of coffee.

Some folks seem to think I'm foolish for doing this, but I disagree. The problem is that it isn't impossible that someone could legitimately be using the site.

As far as them really not caring whether I give them a piece of my mind I'm not really worried about whether they care or not, that part will be a one way conversation as far as I'm concerned.

Anyway, just under 2 days left on the trial. It took several hours before I got my first reply, and it's been most of the next day already with silence. I'm beginning to think #2 is the most likely scenario, though they might attempt a hail Mary at the last minute to get me to bite. They'll probably say nothing though, because I have them in a corner and they know it.
You are not a fool for doing this. You are helping to expose them for the scam that they are, and hopefully will reach some people before they fall for it like I originally did. I'm a lot smarter now and have no use for trying to use dating sites to find a potential partner. If it's in the cards for me, I will find one by building trust through communication and just seeing if we click. I applaud you for your efforts! :)
 

ADDSchoolboy

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UPDATE:
Got a second message! So #1 turned out to be the case. It was more of the same, just generic guilt trip nonsense trying to make me feel bad for not taking the bait like a good fish.

I replied that the questions I asked were simple for anyone from the area to answer, and told her the fact that she won't answer them speaks volumes and is a huge red flag.

Still have about a day and some change left on the trial. We'll see if I get another message. If I do it will be more of the same, in which case I'll just let them have it with both barrels and then have my account deleted.

At this point all the evidence points to an extremely high likelihood (99%) that this website is a complete scam.

I'll update you guys again if I hear anymore.
 

ADDSchoolboy

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Final Update:

So the trial expired with no further messages from the person, which is as expected. So my conclusion is as follows:

ABDLMatch.com, will use actors/actresses to get people to pay for memberships. Those actors/actresses entire job is to string a person out as long as possible and generate revenue for the site. Any attempt to verify them or have a substantive conversation with them will result in misdirection and delay. An account with them is a waste of time and the site is completely dishonest.

For males, finding a female partner to share this part of yourself with is a challenge. Take heart, however, and know that it is completely possible to find that special someone, but there are no shortcuts. You have to do the searching yourself, and you have to put the work in with the people you come across to present yourself as a desirable partner. If you can do that, you will eventually find happiness, but you have to put the work in. Stay away from ABDLMatch.com and any similar type of site. Those sites are scams designed to prey on people.

Instead, find and attend local events, browse Fetlife, find people who might reasonably be compatible with you, and approach them, politely, and with your best foot forward.
 

ElPulpo

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Thank you. I wouldn't have tried anyway, but it was nice to have it verified and certainly useful for optimistic victims.

For males, finding a female partner to share this part of yourself with is a challenge. Take heart, however, and know that it is completely possible to find that special someone, but there are no shortcuts. You have to do the searching yourself, and you have to put the work in with the people you come across to present yourself as a desirable partner. If you can do that, you will eventually find happiness, but you have to put the work in.
Rather than "you will eventually find happiness", I would phrase it "some of you will". There seems to be more demand than supply, and that means you can try to increase your chances, but if all do, some won't be successful.

There are also some who found a temporary partner based on ABDL but broke off because their counterpart was getting on their nerves being too focused on it, while other aspects of a good relationship were lacking.

It's up to you to decide whether you try to get an ABDL match that may turn out a good partner or not, or rather a soul mate that may tolerate your ADBL side some day or not.

I went the other way (and some around here have been more successful than me) and married the woman that's an almost perfect match in almost any aspect except for kinks. I had to be patient until I could confess and then be patient some more until she accepted me wearing, and given her overall tolerant attitude, I thinks it's likely that we'll get even further. At the moment, our kids are the bigger obstacle, as we won't want them to notice - and a perfect ABDL match wouldn't help in that situation either.
 

KittyMerriweather

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At first, I was delighted to find a match site for people in the ABDL community. I matched with someone local, on my first day. That never happens. I was glad to buy the Gold Membership, as the text for that level of membership said I would be able to receive chat requests from people, even those with a free membership.
Nothing could be further from the truth. No one was able to chat with me. I guess suckers like me keep the site up and running.
 
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