Ignorant Parents...

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(if your on FTT you may have already read this.)

Ok well some background info, I basiclly told my parents that I was agnostic today and that I truthfully HATE HATE HATE living in america and that no matter what I'm moving to Canada or England that freaking moment I turn 18, so when they asked what a reason why I wanted to leave the country I used Mike Huckabee and his opinion on gays, and I quote from him "Being gay is a sinful and evil life CHOICE that is a hazard to the safety of the American public"...well my freaking mom goes "Well it is, there all wrong and there are making a sinful CHOICE to be gay." At this point I was about to explode, but no she had to go on "God made adam and eve not adam and steve." Well I went on the defensive and started telling her no and that she is wrong it is not a freaking choice and then she goes and accuses me of being gay(currently I'm pretty confused about sexuality and am starting to have feeling to that side so at lease Bi...) and that if they ever found out I was they would basicly disown me because I made an evil choice....
*there is more but I gave the summery of the whole conversation*
/rant
 

Ranger

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Well, everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but 'hazard to the safety of the American public' is going too far IMO. How he came to this conclusion, I will never know. I doubt that your parents would disown you, but if you think that your parents might disown you, your best bet would to keep your sexuality a secret from them.
 

andysetra

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Uggggh...it saddens me that people are out there like that. The fact that *ANY* parent could even think of disowning their child (gay bashing aside) is just downright horrible.

EDIT: not to insult your parents, I mean no disrespect in that sense.

Yeah, this thread makes me angry just thinking about it. But anyway, there are people like that here too, and anywhere you go. They *do* get a lot more media attention in the U.S. though. Here in Canada, the media is much more...open-minded lol.

I guess being a gay(if not slightly asexual) *BDL has made me a very open minded invidual, but I like to think I would be anyway.

---still, I like a good (and offensive) joke of any kind, as long as it's not used with hate behind it.
 
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Yeah, well it's pretty bad being liberal in a family that voted for bush twice and support him still....
 

andysetra

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Yeah, well it's pretty bad being liberal in a family that voted for bush twice and support him still....
*inner self cries a little for Fallen*

Not that I'm too political or anything, but the things I read and the thing I see him say and do always make me wonder just who in the hell is still with this guy??
 

Tigger

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I was scared that my parents would have that sort of reaction to me baing gay, which is why I left it untill recently to tell them. They took it ok though and were fairly accepting. I'd have to say though if my parents were like that it would be all the better them disowning me with attitudes like that, but I wouldn't know as I've not been in that situation.
 
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Well as she drilled into me about her beliefs my knees were shaking the whole time that she was like "If your gay..." "If I found out...." god it was not pleasent that night....
 

Kraiden

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Heh, my Ma booted me out of the house when I came out of the closet to her....
 

andysetra

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My mom knows, I told her one day and she was ok with it. Although she was/is still convinced that I might not be gay lol. My only regret in telling her is that it is hard on her - and her biggest worry was that I'll have trouble fitting in lol.

Plus, I do have this suspicion that she knows something of my fetish, but it's one of those "if you don't want to tell me, I won't ask." things. But (and this is a story for another time...) she has caught me, fairly red handed in the fast with a diaper...and i had the dumbest possible excuse too!
 
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Tigger

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I think my mum might know about the nappy fetish thang, she once said something that made me think she does, but as long as she doesn't say anything I won't. It's no real problem though since she kicked me out like a year ago and I am on my own now, so I am fairly free to do what I like without anyone finding out.
 

Raccoon

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Yeah, well it's pretty bad being liberal in a family that voted for bush twice and support him still....
It's the "and support him still" part that worries me.

I would have thought most parents are quick enough to realize if their kid is gay early on. Gah. Even if they are so unenlightened as to disapprove I still can't see the disowning part. Gah. Idiots.
 

Peachy

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Personally, I'm wondering why y'all are so worried that your parents will "disown you". Realistically, you're well into your 40s or 50s by the time your parents actually die and any of their possessions may be transferred into your hands. Are a few thousand bucks all that important over your happy life? It's normal and natural to have different ideas than your parents...many many generations have fought that battle before, and you're no different.
I also fail to see how parents can pull the "God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve"-excuse. Maybe that's because (1) I'm not a parent and (2) I'm not religious, but if people insist on believing that everyone is made by God they should use their brains cells to ask themselves the question of "If God made all humans and He made my son, isn't the way my son is the way God wanted him to be?". But why think for yourself when some church officials or self-acclaimed preachers spelled it all out for you. Why cook for yourself when you can use the drive-thru?!

Peachy
 

Roland

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Well, my Mom sounds quite like yours. Gay bashing almost is a habit to her.
It actually makes me feel bad, seeing that I'm a representative in the [removed] for gay rights >_< (Well, that was the topic our group was in)
 
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andysetra

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Peachy, I don't think it's the inheritance, so much as it is the actual act of disowning, and the 20-40 years that follow until they die. It's like breaking up a relationship, only it's family!
 

Charlie

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If your parent's are homophobic, just ignore them and then yeah... move to Canada.
I wouldn't bother with trying to argue with them, if they're ignorant now, they'll probably stay that way.
 
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Personally, it's kinda of hard for a relationship between parents to break because you are gay, and cannot be healed afterwards. I think that the chance is rather weak of this happening and you shouldn't worry about it. My mom seemed like this, but she didn't disown me or anything. Just be strong with this situation.
 

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recovery

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I know that if I were gay and went 'out of the closet' they would still accept me. Not only do they know that I am an odd Son compared to my other 3 brothers. Aswell as my generally knowing my parents view on things (my uncle is gay, and we've never had problems about him being part of the familly). But my parents have clearly said over casual conversation that they still accept me if I were gay. So I guess I am lucky. But unfortuantely I am not gay so I cannot use it to my advantage :p. Instead I ask for more money for 'education needs' As they know I am the only hope in the familly to have a decent carer.

I just really get upset to hear these stories where there parents flip out and think they are trying to decipline you and 'stop being gay'. If it were only that easy. :roll eyes: I think the public needs a little education. They can still use the bible to help them make decisions, but really if you take te Bible to extreme you can't do anything due to the loop-holes. Why can't they use it as a 'guide-line'. I get irritated by those religous nuts.
 

Yawnie

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Heh, ya, the bible thumping kind that follows that book to the word, or the kind where you tell them something that is remotely different in society and they rush you to the nearest shrink and are like "I don't care what you do to him or her, just fix him or her"

I know a guy at school thats gay, who's family and him moved down to Texas and the family joined one of those churches that think being gay is like the disiese of the ultimate sin, and that you should get rid of the person in your famil ASAP so God won't hate your family. Well, the found him on a date holding hands with another guy, next day, they disowned him, treated him like shit, kicked him out of the very small town and then like 3 days later up here, I heard he stole a gun and shot and killed himself.....
 

andysetra

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I know a guy at school thats gay, who's family and him moved down to Texas and the family joined one of those churches that think being gay is like the disiese of the ultimate sin, and that you should get rid of the person in your famil ASAP so God won't hate your family. Well, the found him on a date holding hands with another guy, next day, they disowned him, treated him like shit, kicked him out of the very small town and then like 3 days later up here, I heard he stole a gun and shot and killed himself.....
F**king people should not be allowed to be parents. NOTHING can be as devastating as having your parents disown/kick you out for being who you are. Especially something as hard to deal with in society as being gay. Seriously - when a child finally comes to terms with it, or needs to tell someone, they need someone supportive to get them through it! Not some douchebag who values a BOOK over their own child!

If I'm not mistaken, the whole idea behind Christianity (or at least, the part *I* would value the most) is to be a GOOD PERSON - and a parent who kicks their child out of the house and turns their back on them is NOT a good person.
 

chevre

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I'm not going to advocate kicking your kids out for being gay, but don't forget that it's also hard on parents to hear they have a gay child. If I had a gay child I'd probably wonder if I did something wrong, and there would definitely be strains in terms of beliefs. You may find that silly, but I don't. I think it would be pretty hard.
 
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