I might have found my answer to Why?

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BayB8

BayB8

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  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
Hey guys,

I wanted to get your guy's opinion on something.

Some people say that being ABDL is sometimes caused by a trauma or abuse of some sort, but thats not true for everyone. I have asked myself this and my fiance has asked if I thought something might have happened or some trauma that might have caused me to want to wear and take comfort with diapers. There hasnt been anything that I could think of. My sister was sexually abused when we were younger, but idk if I was. I was way to young. I don't think I was so I always told myself it wasn't because I was abused. Yet i was going through the forums and I read somethi g that brought a memory to the forefront of my brain that I had tried hard to forget.

"I don't know if there is a connection.. I'm pretty sure it was in 3rd grade.. Round 2001-2002. Cuz I remember taking the bus to his house in colchester headed out to grand isle.

We had a sleep over a few times.. The last time I went.. Idk why but he wanted us to touch each other.. I didn't want to but he did. Essetally made me touch him and he me.. I stopped going there after that. Told my parents in pretty sure. Haven't seen him sense. I didn't give it any thought back then to that being a form of abuse because we were friends and the same age.." (Copy paste from a text i sent my fiance this morning)

Like I said, I don't know if that counts as abuse, or if like my fiance suggested, kids explore, so was it just being kids?

Because I stopped going there after and I stopped being friends, I feel like I didn't take it as exploration. I felt violated by it. We would have been 8. So to me that's late for exploration like that but idk.

I cant wrap my head around how something could be caused my something without actually knowing it, but that doesnt mean it canr happen.

Im just trying to thibk this through. I feel like its already to talk to people know what I'm talking about and feel the same.

Thanks guys

BayB8

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My male friends and I explored on occasion (rarely) up until our mid-teens (touching only). This is perfectly normal according to some sources. My diaper "fetish" started when I was about five (though inactive), so for me the two were totally unrelated.
 
My first memory of it was shortly after that... So I really don't know.m

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My very first memory at age four was me going to steal my baby brother's diaper and putting it on. Before that, who knows what actually triggered it in me. I was not abused anytime after that either, so I'd be inclined to say I wasn't beforehand either.

So no, I do not believe abuse *has* to be a part or in full the reason for abdl's.
 
I'm pretty sure I'm abuse free. I'm really not that interested in causes but if I were inclined to dig into them, I'd look at things that were significant events. That winds up being very tricky since what's significant to one person may not be to someone else. I'm also skeptical of complex desires being sourced from a single event. I suspect we're more like flowcharts in that sense. A single event may be a major gating item but probably requires any number of other experiences or inclinations to form those connections in a real and lasting way.

I'd also be generally suspect of any memories of abuse without some outside corroboration. Memories are unreliable, particularly for children. I had a childhood memory that seemed very real but when I really thought about it, it seemed unlikely (I couldn't recall any consequences, and there should have been). I got around to asking about it and my dad was quick to set me straight. I can't see that he'd have any reason to lie since it was something dumb that I thought I did and had no reflection on anyone but me.

For the sake of argument, let's say you're correct and that this is why you're an ABDL? What would that mean to you? If it's a coping mechanism for something that was traumatic, presumably it does the job. If you enjoy it and it doesn't hurt you or others, it seems like it's better than some of the possible alternatives.
 
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Lrt it be known im not saying this is why, I'm just saying its a posibility.

And on a side note, I dont think there has to be abuse or trauma to be abdl.

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Trevor and Star have summed up my thoughts when reading this post so will not repeat.

Would like to add that going down the rabbit hole of how, why, when etc. can lead to trouble. You may start a journey of trying to figure it all out without getting anywhere. You may discover something you had actually buried deep inside and it spoils your enjoyment. What if the searching causes issues for your mental health through worry or from not managing to work it out? Life is for enjoying the here and now!
 
MotherFaith said:
Trevor and Star have summed up my thoughts when reading this post so will not repeat.

Would like to add that going down the rabbit hole of how, why, when etc. can lead to trouble. You may start a journey of trying to figure it all out without getting anywhere. You may discover something you had actually buried deep inside and it spoils your enjoyment. What if the searching causes issues for your mental health through worry or from not managing to work it out? Life is for enjoying the here and now!
Click to expand...

From my own experience... I have pretty clear memories from my early childhood and what seems like a fairly good theory of how I became sexually attracted to training pants and the like. Focusing too much on the past for me though can just be like... ugh. I lament the fact I cannot remember being in diapers and didn't get to wear training pants the first time around. I can be rather envious of preschool-age children still in padding. But I can't go back and change the past. I can only live out my desires in my ''second childhood''.
 
Thanks guys, I appreciate you guys taking the time to give your input and opinions. I am taking them in to consideration

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I've wanted to wear diapers since I can remember, like from the age of 4, so I don't think I was abused.
 
There are a million different psychological answers for this. One is just as good as another so it doesn't matter which one you pick, except, it might be psychologically beneficial to pick one of the more pleasant ones.

The reason you are turning to psychology for an answer is because, like everyone else, you were brought up believing there are only two possible explanations for any human behavior: psychology or evolution. In the absence a good evolutionary explanation for some specific behavior people naturally assume it must have a psychological cause. I question that assumption, but I'm definitely in the minority on that.
 
When I was little, I always loved being cute! I still do!!!!
I'm thinking mine wasn't abuse. I'm pretty sure mine was caused by father dying when I was 12. I crave for father figure attention. Good thing my Husband doesn't mind it, and has accepted the roll of Daddy ;)
 
I had ABDL Thoughts way back before I had a Traumatic moment in my life and I believe ti was the way to help It was but I can never get a chance to be little It really Freaking stinks
Wish I could be little
 
BayB8 said:
Thanks guys, I appreciate you guys taking the time to give your input and opinions. I am taking them in to consideration
Click to expand...
Also there maybe just no reason "why" other then that it's just the natural you. I wasn't ware of my "little" side until my mid to late 20's, but I literally never grew out of my stuffed animals. So it's likely that I've always been this way.
 
I've come to believe I was born this way, no trauma or drama necessary. Reaching this conclusion about myself has helped me to understand other people with other ways they lead their lives.
 
I posted befor we spent a long time in pampers 2 to 4 year for some .
Not so unpleasant mom attention and love.
For some did want to give it up.
We're still attached to the good feeling pampers have.
For others it was the love there siblings got .
They in there kids mind I want that too.
Some think I want to be a baby too.

I know my trigger I was forced into diapers 6 or 7.
It felt so good that first diapering.
Some we're bedwetters and punished .
Not all liked them but enough of us did.

I feel that if you are put into diapers at older age your body on some level remembers the confort of them.

That goes for those that tryed them on there own.
Or sisters playing house and diapered there little brother .

What ever the reasons why we like them.
You are not alone in your likes.
Your not so strange there are so many of us.
We are not the majority but it can happen.

Just know you are you so we like pampers.
It's ok I know of much worse thing to be into .
I will just enjoy my thing .
Pass the powder please.
 
Yes, incontinence may be caused by some trauma and tragic events, but it's usually not the case and I don't think your little "experience" can be called as traumatic events as I personally know many people that were experimenting a lot in their early teens, it was like discovering their sexuality. I personally have experienced that, just a bit before I got into girls, I was experimenting with my childhood friends, we were touching each other, sleeping together, pretending to be a couple, playing house and learning all those things that we take for granted now - it was quite an amazing experience, but I have never repeated this step and since then I've exclusively stick to dating girls only, but I would never call it traumatic event it was more of learning new things and giving a shape to your sexuality.
 
Alot of things can be attributed to abuse, however it's not always the case. For example abuse or trauma could have attributed to me being homosexual or to being an ABDL... but it could also just have been a coincidence.
 
I'm not so much concerned with the cause(though I do tend to over-think it when I try to), I'm more concerned about how it could happen for me when I have several other feelings/preferences/thoughts that go so heavily against it.
 
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