I don’t want my boyfriend to come out as a little to his friends, is this bad?


Hello, I hope this is the right place to ask about this. After finding out my boyfriend of over a year is an AB a few months ago, I tried out a mommy role for him and now it has become a huge part of our relationship.

Ever since I found out he’s a little, he’s been talking about wanting to come out to a mutual friend of ours and one of his own and talks about how much he wishes he could be a little around them.

Even apart from my own feelings I don’t think either of these friends are right to be told. our mutual friend has told us he doesn’t want to know any of the sexual details of our relationship and has been very judgmental towards ageplayers. the other friend, although fairly close to my boyfriend, is just not the type to want to talk about personal stuff.

So, when it comes to my personal feelings, I see this as a very intimate, personal thing to even tell someone about. I would be incredibly uncomfortable with anyone else knowing, and I would absolutely feel cheated on if he was a little around anyone other than me.

As much as I have voiced these feelings he still feels this way. He promises not to tell anyone or do anything with someone else without my permission, but it doesn’t make him desire to do it any less and admittedly I feel really bad about not being okay with it and I don’t feel like a good enough mommy.

How much of a say should I really have here? Do I really have the right to tell my partner not to come out to his friends?


Est. Contributor
Diaper Lover, Incontinent
Hi and welcome mayliliy! That is a good question. Short answer: He should not tell and I think if he wants to continue a relationship with you, he should listen to your advice. Generally, most people do not understand the AB world and telling an unsuspecting soul about a personal fetish could result in an unwanted result. Your one friend even said he didn't want to hear anything about your personal relationship so why risk a friendship over it?
Please keep this private and when they come over make sure all evidence is hidden.


Est. Contributor
Adult Baby, Diaper Lover, Babyfur
You've raised some questions I don't think we can definitively answer. That said, I can think of some general guidelines.

Although most of us prefer to keep this part private, between intimates and other ABDLs/littles, we still see some who want to share more broadly. This can work out well or not so well depending on circumstances. It's not always easy to be objective about the best course.

I don't think anyone has the right to out anyone else. I also don't think we have the right to prevent others from telling about themselves, although in a committed relationship, the partner's misgivings should count substantially. It's additionally complicated when telling about yourself reasonably raises questions about a partner's participation that the partner doesn't care to get involved with.

In regard to your feelings about how intimate this is, I think your expectations are a bit out of tune with the culture. Your relationship is paramount but I think it's healthy to socialize with like-minded others when possible and some kinds of ageplay may also occur in complete innocence. I believe it is possible to "cheat" in this sense but I don't think all interactions fall into the cheating category. That might be something for you to consider going forward. These feelings often have implications outside the bedroom and there isn't much of a playbook to establish basic ground rules other than communication between you.


Est. Contributor
Adult Baby, Diaper Lover
I think you know his friends better than we do and if you don't think they would either accept this well or would want to know, then your boyfriend should take your advise. My question to him would be, what does he gain by telling them and what could he lose.


Est. Contributor
Adult Baby, Sissy, Little, Incontinent
bacikly reg this i would STRONGLY advice that you remain strong against his outing as this may back fire in a whole lot of areas .

Most of this part of this life Be it AB DL Sissy You name it is ment to be a PRIVATE part of personal life and outing it is bacikly NOT a good idea UNLESS sed persons include are to be trusted and can accept and accept .

What i would ask him is as Dog boy says and also ad do you really feel you wont to risk things getting bad enough to risk our Relationship as you feel that this is OK between the too of you BUT NOT to include others .

And reg youre feeling like a failure because you dont wont him to come out ? DONT the majority of AB`s DL `s Sissy `s are closet ones and this life is bacikly designed as a Closet life stile so by you dont wont him to come out does in NO WAY SHAPE or form make you less of a good Mommy dear :hug:

And lastly YES you do have the right to not wanting youre partner come out and risk both of youre RL relationship, a partner ship is ALWAYS mutual dear so if one part dont agree in this particular lifestyle matter then the other shouldent do this. Simple as That
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Est. Contributor
Diaper Lover
I agree with the posts above. If he outs himself he outs you by proxy. We sometimes want to be accepted by our friends and can develop unrealistic expectations. Good luck!