I am still having issues finding people on fetlife

[KittyninjaW]

Honestly, I just don't get, why it's so hard. Am I just that socially awkward or is it something else because I don't really know what to do here.

 

[littleph0enix]

Have not tryed fetlife my self yet but what are you looking for/ trying to get from such a meet?

At this stage I would tend to say it's not dont to being socially awkward (at least I hope not), in my mind it's down to your area or just not looking at or seeing the right poeple.

 

[KittyninjaW]

Have not tryed fetlife my self yet but what are you looking for/ trying to get from such a meet?

At this stage I would tend to say it's not dont to being socially awkward (at least I hope not), in my mind it's down to your area or just not looking at or seeing the right poeple.

Maybe. Honestly I'm looking for a caregiver/ mommy. I guess maybe it's the area where I live? Because I live in rural Missouri.

 

[BenNevis]

At the end of the day, people are complex. Sure, if you're looking for someone who's into ABDL stuff and have that in common, then of course, there are others who share that. But simply both liking nappies or liking being little isn't generally enough to sustain anything meaningful. The key is having other interests that you can talk about and share with the aim of demonstrating that you would both be similar enough to get along even without the whole ABDL stuff.

In terms of finding a CG/Mummy, there also needs to be a consideration of what you can bring the other person in return. What I mean is, a relationship isn't purely one-way. Maybe its snuggles? Maybe you cook really well? Maybe you like taking long walks together? Whatever it is and as cheesy as it may sound, I think the key is sharing a bit of your personality out, upon which that CG-Little relationship can be built.

But it is difficult to find people and like you say, being in rural Missouri probably makes things difficut.

 

[Mummystrictssissybaby]

I’m on Fetlife as stillinnappies.🍼🧷👶🏻

 

[BuffedBaby]

Have you used the search feature to find others? There are a lot of ABDL groups there, you might want to click on the groups tab and do a member search from there

 

[Anemone]

Sounds like you're not having difficulty finding people, just very specific people in a particular area.

I think the internet has us conditioned to expect absolute convenience, which I can't believe is a healthy way to approach things.

Fetlife is a tool, it can help you to meet people. It does not however work like in Weird Science.

 

[Lyric]

I’m on Fetlife as stillinnappies.🍼🧷👶🏻

love your diapers and plastic pants.

 

[Omg301]

I feel like if you're searching for a caregiver/mommy, 99.99% of the time, you're going to find a woman that wants to exploit you and make you pay. It's because its a very one-way sort of relationship, unless you're open to reciprocating and not always being in the baby role. Either way, it'd be hard to find someone in your local area that it into going that sort of route, especially one that wants to do it without asking for money. But, it's possible.

Those that fit it are incredible lucky, especially if its only one way and you find a 'mommy' that just likes being a mommy above all else. I'm sure I'm not the only one that would love to get my diaper changed by someone else. It's probably exacerbated by the fact that I am absolutely horrid at taping my adult diaper on right now since I'm so new at it. ><

 

[littleph0enix]

Maybe. Honestly I'm looking for a caregiver/ mommy. I guess maybe it's the area where I live? Because I live in rural Missouri.

All I can say from that and what I have seen is other then the wrong kind of people looking for a CG or mommy is like mad levels of hard since like 90%of the time it is the wrong kinds of people, the only time I hear this going well often is when people are not looking for a GC or such but want to meet up or do events with other people that are some what related to being or liking ABDL.

From there people that are genuine AB/ DL or CG learn to trust the people they see and get on with, once there is trust and a bond of some sort said people in your area are happy to try and be a AB or little of CG to you. So as a sum up inless you are like super lucky the genuine people you want to get to know/ meet are unlikely going to come up, if you are willing to get your out there to meet others in your area your chance go up of meeting someone genuine but even this is not 100% true as I said before hand.

 

[littledreamers333]

I'm on fetlife and having same problem

 

[Cottontail]

Maybe. Honestly I'm looking for a caregiver/ mommy. I guess maybe it's the area where I live? Because I live in rural Missouri.

Being in the "middle of nowhere" surely complicates matters. I had meetups falling into my lap when I lived near Seattle. When I relocated to a more rural area, I took to FetLife hoping to find some munches. So far, zippo. There's just not a critical mass of ABDLs in these parts. If you can manage some travel, maybe look for events in neighboring cities. Meeting people and talking with them about your interests might open some doors for you. A lot of the best stuff seems to be word-of-mouth and requires building some trust first. Those who openly advertise themselves as CGs/mommies are, more often than not, trying to exploit desperation.

 

[KittyninjaW]

Everyone has given me a lot to think about, I will consider it all.

 

[LilByte]

fetlife also scares off most people with its deluge of d pics. I had better luck finding people on kik, that being said I never got anywhere with it, but at least I was talking to real people on it. Still allot of creeps tho, every time a woman would join you would have two creeps in each group that would spam them for pics or spam pics at them till they left... Had one of them even go after me as a guy trying to find my location and lieing about where they lived, I wasn't intersted so was easier to see it was bait, could been bad for someone desperate tho. Who knows what they wanted to do.

 

[Magicalgirl101]

fetlife also scares off most people with its deluge of d pics. I had better luck finding people on kik, that being said I never got anywhere with it, but at least I was talking to real people on it. Still allot of creeps tho, every time a woman would join you would have two creeps in each group that would spam them for pics or spam pics at them till they left... Had one of them even go after me as a guy trying to find my location and lieing about where they lived, I wasn't intersted so was easier to see it was bait, could been bad for someone desperate tho. Who knows what they wanted to do.

Just a heads up about kik, they deleted all of the abdl groups from there

 

[siysiy]

Honestly, I just don't get, why it's so hard. Am I just that socially awkward or is it something else because I don't really know what to do here.

You need to be careful fetlife. Most of mine have come from going to meets.

You might like to try out 'The Littles Hang Out' on Telegram. As that seem to be very active.

 

[BellasMommy]

As a Mommy who found my babygirl on Collarspace, there are a couple things I can tell you that may help.

First off, there are tons of people all looking for the same thing... A real life CG/Mommy that does not make a living doing it. So you need to understand that we get a ton... pages and pages full of wankers that just want to get their rocks off. So in order to sort through the Do Me Bois, Most of us delete any thing that does not have a picture in the profile or minimally filled out "About yourself" I am not saying you need to put a face pic in there, or tell the name of your small town, but I can tell you from experience that if you are not open and genuine sounding in your profile, I will delete and block you immediately.

Secondly, in any first contact PM, you have to use more than a one line introduction. Any one line , "Hi, how are you?" gets deleted and blocked. There has to be something about me and you that adds interest.... For instance if you were to contact me and notice that in my profile it says I like mountain biking, you could say... Hello my name is a kittybaby. I live in small town Missouri. I see you like mt biking I was just wondering how you would make me ride in a diaper or if I could wear a pullup if you were to become my Mommy and we went for a ride... where all would we get to go? I know I live really far from you, but would you ever consider.....? I like blah, blah, blah.... It's really hard for me to stay in babyspace and sound desirable, what do you look for in a little?

What I am saying is that because there are so few of us (Mommies) out here, there has to be something about you that piques my interest. Be wise, be honest, be forthcoming. Ask questions about the CG that are more than yes or no answers. Be intellectually simulating... you have to be more than just the same as the last wanker.... So for example, if you look at MrMae 's introduction on this site, there are a ton of things that you can talk to her about that could set you apart!!! Be wise... Be Brilliant!!! Stop whining. xo

Just thoughts
Bella's Mommy

 

[mrprotege13]

fetlife in my area is a ghost town.

 

[MrMae]

I feel like if you're searching for a caregiver/mommy, 99.99% of the time, you're going to find a woman that wants to exploit you and make you pay. It's because its a very one-way sort of relationship, unless you're open to reciprocating and not always being in the baby role. Either way, it'd be hard to find someone in your local area that it into going that sort of route, especially one that wants to do it without asking for money. But, it's possible.

Those that fit it are incredible lucky, especially if it’s only one way and you find a 'mommy' that just likes being a mommy above all else. I'm sure I'm not the only one that would love to get my diaper changed by someone else. It's probably exacerbated by the fact that I am absolutely horrid at taping my adult diaper on right now since I'm so new at it. ><

I wouldn’t the percentage of real women who identify as a mommy is that small. However, I do agree that it can be quite difficult to find one who is truly interested in being in that role. Our society teaches women that they should be submissive and let the man have control over everything. Yes, I know the world is changing but a lot of women still hold this view. It’s not until they are told that there are plenty of men who want a dominant woman that they let themselves be dominant and enjoy the control/power.

 

[RainbowConnection]

I'm afraid FetLife... Isn't a dating site. Nor is it really a place to find kink/ roleplay partners. FetLife's intention is to link you to a community and to give you a space to befriend others who are like you.

Now, some of those interactions could end up leading into a relationship -- this has happened before, and a few members on here have that experience. But generally, your best bet is to make friends, attend events (munches with a vanilla dress code are always a good start), and try joining in discussions. Some people do post their dating ads on Fet, and you can definitely have something in your profile stating who/ what you're looking for.

But, yeah. Fet is just a community platform. The good news is, though, that using it as such will probably grant you better opportunities to meet others and therefore also increase your chances of meeting someone.

Alternatively, I've heard that many people end up dating someone using a vanilla dating site, and then later introducing their kink to their partner. This is, of course, a lot riskier in terms of rejection -- as you don't know if you'll both share the same interests -- but I've heard happy endings from this approach.