I am a male... aren't I?

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Premetheus

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I mean, I like to wear womens underwear from time to time... maybe a skirt or something. I just would never be comfortable enough in my own skin to go in public. The best I can do is wear eyeshadow, nailpolish, and have panties on under my male clothes. If you ask me that takes some kind of guts for a femboy, right? Yet I'm always conflicted with my emotions. Part of me wants to just say screw it and do what I want, but the other half says no, just let everyone fall for the masuline disguise you carry on your face and in your strong walk. Now, I'm not shy, I used to be though.. .even.. anti social at times. Sometimes the past keeps haunting me and the social anxiety to comply with societal norms just pulls me away from who I am as a person. I am.. fairly masculine all around. I tend to do things such as but not limited to; baking, rollerblading, running, drawing, blogging, youtube, etc but even when I'm out in the public I just keep to myself unless the situation calls for me to be social. Now, I do have a masculine side and I am not ashamed of it, I just hate it because guys are always comparing their dick size to one another but I personally just don't care about it. I hate being around guys who brag and those who are so full of themselves they might as well be a walking penis or something. I hope I'm not too graphic for this side of ABDL and I apologise and will remove this post if asked to do so or at least edit it.. What do you guys say about a straight femboy? Thoughts? Ideas? Any helpful advice is appreciated, I will try not to lose my cool like I did in my "Serious post" post.
 

tai

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Honestly? It's perfectly natural and almost anyone will tell you the same Don't get me wrong some( okay a lot ) people(s) will tell you that's it's just weird or plane gross but lets be honest the only way something like this will affect you is if you want to let others keep you down. What you choose to do and what you choose to accept are what make you. And you never know some of the guys might be jealous you can pull it off .lol.
 
M

Maxx

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Everybody is curious, everybody experiments. Some are more open about it than others. Might mean something, but probably doesn't.

Remember that to a large degree, clothing styles are an artificial, cultural thing. In other times and places, what we regard as feminine or masculine might be regarded as anything from silly to outrageous rather than a statement of gender.
 

Barush

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Easy test to find out your sex is looking between your legs.
You don't need to be a girl to wear a skirt, just like you don't need to be male to wear trousers.
 

babylock1

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Easy test to find out your sex is looking between your legs.
You don't need to be a girl to wear a skirt, just like you don't need to be male to wear trousers.

Such a profound observation !
But reality sets in fast and it is unavoidable !
Then there are those who wish that they did not have THIS and then those that wish that it was THAT that they have !

Leaving the Garden no one cared about what was worn - fig leafs sufficed - then when the weather and location factored
in most everyone donned a robe or wrap type of garment. Was fine until man had a need to ride a beast of burden and
larger animal. Robes just weren't cutting it hence the split garment aka pants trousers bifurcated stove pipes etc. was
born. Others in more mild climates adopted a shorten type of robe the tunic and the warriors made do with a short
skirt with leather paneling for protection.
This the start of Clothing 101 - - - - -

Then the age of morality and things that should not be seen had to be covered.
And an anti-movement - things that a person was born with should not be
hidden.
Well guess who won out on this - thus to this day the wearing of revealing
clothing is considered taboo except for babies who don't know what sex is
all about and could care less until - I want what HE has - and then the HE's
well a small minority want what SHE has.

Sexuality one mixed up nightmare for those seeking the alternate solution !

BUT I find it great to wear a skirt kilt or dress in spite of all this !
 

beckijed

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Wear what you want when you want... if you look at clothes in general with the exception of skirts and dresses. Male and Female clothes are basically the same... If you don't feel confident to wear a skirt/dress in public get some female cut jeans or trousers and a plain top and give those ago... no one will know... i don't own any male underwear and regularly wear female suit trousers to work and no one has ever guessed... AND it feels great
 

StargazerBleu

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Society is a funny think.
It tells ppl what everyone they should think is "normal"
A lot can not think for themselves, and just follow the crowd like sheep.

I wish it was a society that's more open minded,
so any one can wear what they wanted, no mater what is between there legs.

Tho I would be scared and nervous to wear other clothes in public.
Tho my likes are limited in what I like to wear.

I do wear women's sandals.
Unless you really study them, its hard to tell there women's shoes.
Sometimes I do panties on rare occasions I am not padded *giggles*
 
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tall2826

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Just yesterday I went out shopping for some panties and I got some strange looks from guys and girls who happened to pass by me while I was browsing for ones to pick out. Panties are the only article of women's clothing that I wear outside of my room because it is easily concealed but for everything else I stay in one place while wearing it. I would be scared to wear anything other than panties in public.
You shouldn't really worry and you should be you and wear whatever you would like to wear.
 

43goofball43

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I believe that it is perfectly A-OK for a person to experiment with things we feel that desire to wear.

In the past, I've worn skirts, socks, bra's, panties, thigh-high stockings, pantyhose, tights( these all support shoes) & even tried a slip. I did all of this in my own home and no-one was any the wiser.

As for the pantyhose & and tights that is anther story in it's self. I have to wear support on both legs because of vericose veins for the past 20 some years so they have just become another article of clothing, for those who are wondering, I do wear my pantyhose/tights with shorts all the time. The same holds true when I wear thigh-high support stockings. The Thigh- highs, I usually wear with my diapers at home or out and about. I don't feel like I need to go into the public domain dressed as a woman though.
 

Penny

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Being a woman or being a man has literally nothing to do with what you like an everything to do with how you feel.

I think it sucks so much that we have gender norms and socially acceptable gender expressions but honestly there's no harm with a boy who likes dresses and glitter or a girl who likes soldiers and race cars.

Like what you like, just remember that your interests don't define who you are as a person
 

Sanch

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You are a male. Considering that you don't self-identify as female & have male sex organs, I don't see much doubt about that. I think the question you're asking is more 'am I masculine?'. To which the answer seems to be 'not especially'. Not that that in any way invalidates your gender identity, nor is it a personal failing.

Gender norms are essentially a social construct. One good example of this is lipstick. In Ancient Rome, men and women wore lipstick to signify their wealth and high-class standing. By the Middle Ages, it was almost exclusively worn by women, and even in the 21st century when we've debunked a lot of traditional, antiquated ideas about gender, you'd still get some very odd looks from people if you're a guy wearing red lipstick - whereas when a woman wears that, it's considered 'normal'. There's no logical basis for that. It's just a facet of how we as a species are still tied up with some nonsensical notions about gender.

My advice, Premetheus, is to do what feels comfortable for you. If you feel that going out in public in typically female attire & make-up will cause you more problems than it's worth, don't do it. If you feel that it's a type of public self-expression you need to have, and you're willing to deal with people being (rightly or wrongly) suspicious or critical about it, then go for it. Just remember that none of this has anything to do with your gender - what you like is defined by your character, your feelings and your desires, not what you have between your legs.
 

Premetheus

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You are a male. Considering that you don't self-identify as female & have male sex organs, I don't see much doubt about that. I think the question you're asking is more 'am I masculine?'. To which the answer seems to be 'not especially'. Not that that in any way invalidates your gender identity, nor is it a personal failing.

Gender norms are essentially a social construct. One good example of this is lipstick. In Ancient Rome, men and women wore lipstick to signify their wealth and high-class standing. By the Middle Ages, it was almost exclusively worn by women, and even in the 21st century when we've debunked a lot of traditional, antiquated ideas about gender, you'd still get some very odd looks from people if you're a guy wearing red lipstick - whereas when a woman wears that, it's considered 'normal'. There's no logical basis for that. It's just a facet of how we as a species are still tied up with some nonsensical notions about gender.

My advice, Premetheus, is to do what feels comfortable for you. If you feel that going out in public in typically female attire & make-up will cause you more problems than it's worth, don't do it. If you feel that it's a type of public self-expression you need to have, and you're willing to deal with people being (rightly or wrongly) suspicious or critical about it, then go for it. Just remember that none of this has anything to do with your gender - what you like is defined by your character, your feelings and your desires, not what you have between your legs.
Thank you for the soild advice. I really wasn't sure to think of the other comments in the thread to be honest. I am male, I identify as male, and I always will. I do wear some female clothes in public just to test the waters so to speak. I thibnk if I am in a group of friends who don't judge me at least to my face, I'll be alright in public. I'm sure I'm comfortable in male clothing and most days I prefer to wear male clothes. A constant in my clothing is wearing panties underneath my jeans. Most men and women falsely assume they won't fit or they won't feel right. Truth is... it always feels good unless there is no room for parts of the well male to go. So in conclusion of this post, I will say I am getting comfortable with who I am as a man and I am feminine despite masculine physical appearance.
 

sherryt

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i like painted toe nails, clear painted fingernails, lip bloss, and some female colonges-better than mine..
 

TheCaptain

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Easy test to find out your sex is looking between your legs.
You don't need to be a girl to wear a skirt, just like you don't need to be male to wear trousers.

Essentially this. You can't choose your gender, but you can choose your gender identity. If you have male sex organs, you're male. If you have female sex organs, you're female. If you have both, you're a hermaphrodite.

- - - Updated - - -

I also agree with Sanch too.

If you feel strongly enough about it, you'll feel/have the need to wear in public even if it is going against social norms. Where you live probably affects how accepted/unaccepted it is, but it's not like every person you encounter will be giving you judgemental looks if your nails are painted and/or you're wearing eyeliner (wearing panties I'd imagine is akin to wearing a diaper in public which in most cases should be discrete enough to be unnoticed). But there will be some people who will judge and treat you differently because of it. What you think and whether accepting the good with the bad is worth it to you is what really matters though.

I just want to point out that at my work at least a few times; I've assisted customers that were men fully dressed in women's clothing with make up and everything. And, in large part thanks to this forum, I wasn't in the least bit uncomfortable nor did I treat them any differently than any other customer. Sure, at first glance in my head I was kinda like "Woh, this isn't what I usually encounter" but that's about it. They seemed like pretty cool and decent people and were good customers, and personally that's what I really care about.
 

ZhailorDan

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Personally, I find it a peculiar kind of ridiculous that most places don't find the whole tomboy thing wrong/weird/otherwise unacceptable, but femboys and full-on transgirls are ridiculed in most places, fewer look on them with contempt, while a small percentage still goes to violent extremes to express their 'displeasure'. I speak from experience on the first two, and I can relate several stories from my friends about the last one. It's really sad that the trans community has to face this when I see nothing bad about what we do. I find it especially hypocritical when I consider that almost nobody actually follows the vanilla persona that is so prevalent in the image our society presents.
 

ChrisKrinkle

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I certainly am a Male, and I am perfectly happy with that. But, that said, one of my greatest moments was throwing away all my male underwear! There is just something about panties...why shouldn't I wear them 24/7 :) I also have an extravagant collection of satin wedding gowns (yum)

I am also, of course, an AB/DL...and a sissy baby girl at that! My wife tells me I really go to the extreme! Funny thing is, I really don't FEEL like a girl/sissy, I just like looking pretty all dolled up.

I am happy that things are just where they need to be
 

FeekaDimension

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You're a male because male and female is sex, and that's based purely on body parts. (If you are a human and have parts of both, it's actually called "intersex", not hermaphrodite.)

What you're asking is if you're a man. Only you can answer that. You might want to research different genders if you feel you don't quite fit the "man" category. There are categories such as demiboy (where you're "almost" a man but not quite) or androgynne (where you fall somewhere in the center between boy and girl) or nonbinary (where you don't feel you fit the spectrum at all).

But just because you have traditionally effeminate tendencies does not mean you absolutely MUST identify as something other than a man. I know people who identify as men who wear lovely dresses and flowers in their hair on a regular basis.

Really, your gender is up to you and what makes YOU feel most comfortable. At the end of the day, if you've considered all your options and you still feel like a man, then go ahead and be a man. There's no law that says a man MUST be 100% manly 100% of the time. (unless you're in an Old Spice commercial)
 
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I was certainly born a male (latest check confirms this...lol), but that does not mean I ignore my feminine feelings. Far from it to say the least. But I what have learned over the years is to be totally at peace with your feminine side and to let it be part of your every day life. And for those of us that are happy with being fem/sissybois, we all have different levels of displaying that lovely persona of ourselves. Some will only display in the comforts and privacy of their home, some will be a bit more open about it and display just little hints of femininity out in public. And of course there are others that are much more relaxed and open about it and find contentment of displaying that openness to the fullest.

As for myself I am very comfortable with wearing jeans that are designed with ladies in mind, and that even goes for my tees that are cool and cute, but not overly. And without a doubt my underthings are always girlie things, be it panties and pantyhose, and sometimes with the right tee, a lovely little thin cami. My toes are painted and quite visible when wearing open toed sandals. I have not used male toiletries in years as I am much comfortable with lady ones, of which I am very fond of that so lightly scented "Tatiana" perfume.

The only thing that is of great importance is your own level of "display comfort". Nothing else matters!!!!
 

Premetheus

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Thank you all for the input, after much thought and research.... I am just a feminine male. I love being male and would not identify with anything else. My rough past and present probably force me to be open only because I want to help others. I am never one to shy away from emotion... but that doesn't mean I didn't in the past. I am comfortable as I am, just not comfortable displaying much feminine behavior or apparel in public. I have however gone as far to wear leggings (spandex and regular cotton) but most people assume I'm a runner. I actually am a runner... but that doesn't distract from the point I made. You all have pretty insightful advice, some I wasn't sure who it was directed at because I didn't identify with all of it, but overall useful. Thanks a lot, you wonderful humans you.
 

Drifter

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@ Premetheus: What pullupjoys refers to as "display comfort" could be defined as the level of risk you are comfortable with, and the risk of some unwanted confrontation is very real but unpredictable. We understand what society expects regarding public behavior because we, ourselves, are society; just a more open minded portion of it when it comes to cross dressing and/or diaper play. Your discomfort in publicly displaying feminine behavior is very reasonable, very human. Still, you apparently find it a little thrilling to push the envelope a bit. Nothing wrong with that. Many of the things we enjoy in life involve some risk.

In my younger days, being outed as a diaper freak would have been devastating. Now that I'm older I still don't want to be "outed", but I find enjoyment in taking little risks. Sooner or later, engaging in risky behavior will result in getting beat up, either literally or figuratively, but the risk is part of the thrill.
 
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