MattDLJ
Est. Contributor
- Messages
- 109
- Role
- Diaper Lover
So I haven't been active on here since 2008. In a way my DL attraction was almost non existant which i find hard to understand because this past month ive found it impossible to not think about them!
My question is.....how should i engage the conversation with my girlfirend who ive been with for just over 3 years? I feel like i literally can't go on anymore as its constantly at the front of my mind!
At the start of the relationship she saw that i had watched a couple of diaper vids on the net and its safe to say she kind of lost her shit with me but i managed to brush it aside (god knows how). Everything has been dandy up until late summer this year when i was having trouble at night and was constantly needing to wee. Literally like a dozen times a night and it was causing no end stress. The reason being was because i was taking some gym pre-workout supplements and i suspect it wasn't agreeing with me so i no longer take it but thats by the by. Anyway i kind of hinted and tried to put into convo that maybe I need a nappy to help me sleep because its making me anxious at night always thinking i need a wee etc etc. She most likely considered it a joke and a laugh but i followed through and said im actually gonna order some. So i ordered some abu cushies on ebay and told her but i can only imagine she saw this as a bit of a laugh. Said package arrives a day later and she immediately opens them and laughs hysterically. She said i had to put one on which unbeknown to her i did willingly. Within 20 seconds of putting it on she basically said take it off. I explained to her that i liked it and that it was comfortable to which she just said you look weird. She had plans to go out so she was a bit rushed but basically said that she wanted it off by the time i got home which i did.
Next scenario was the night after when typically i couldnt stop going to the loo and excuse the pun it was driving me potty! At this stage i had no idea it was potentially this supplement. The mrs was going mental because i was up and down like a yo-yo so i kind of said well this is what ive bought these for so im gonna use it otherwise im having another night with no sleep again! She was highly against the thought and sajd i was not coming to bed with that on, therefore i was relegated to the sofa -_-. By morning she was understandably very off with me and she was stating how she 'doesn't know what to do' and that we were 'very different people'. Given the chance i should have spoken about it then but i tried to brush it off as usual and made out that i didn't know what she was talking about. We patched up our little argument and i threw out the pack of cushies.
Nothing has been mentioned since about the matter but since trying one of those cushies on i have struggled not to really think about it at some stage. Is it possible that my girlfriend has an idea that im interested or do you think she thinks its something of nothing and hasn't clocked? No one in my life knows about this and i'd find confessing to be the hardest obstacle in my existance. The concept of her freaking out about it teriffies me because if we were to break up she may tell everyone why. We've been together over 3 years, we have our own house and we love each other very much but i don't think this is something she would accept given the previous past incidents.....
Sorry for the essay but felt like i needed to get some of these thoughts of my fingertips.
My question is.....how should i engage the conversation with my girlfirend who ive been with for just over 3 years? I feel like i literally can't go on anymore as its constantly at the front of my mind!
At the start of the relationship she saw that i had watched a couple of diaper vids on the net and its safe to say she kind of lost her shit with me but i managed to brush it aside (god knows how). Everything has been dandy up until late summer this year when i was having trouble at night and was constantly needing to wee. Literally like a dozen times a night and it was causing no end stress. The reason being was because i was taking some gym pre-workout supplements and i suspect it wasn't agreeing with me so i no longer take it but thats by the by. Anyway i kind of hinted and tried to put into convo that maybe I need a nappy to help me sleep because its making me anxious at night always thinking i need a wee etc etc. She most likely considered it a joke and a laugh but i followed through and said im actually gonna order some. So i ordered some abu cushies on ebay and told her but i can only imagine she saw this as a bit of a laugh. Said package arrives a day later and she immediately opens them and laughs hysterically. She said i had to put one on which unbeknown to her i did willingly. Within 20 seconds of putting it on she basically said take it off. I explained to her that i liked it and that it was comfortable to which she just said you look weird. She had plans to go out so she was a bit rushed but basically said that she wanted it off by the time i got home which i did.
Next scenario was the night after when typically i couldnt stop going to the loo and excuse the pun it was driving me potty! At this stage i had no idea it was potentially this supplement. The mrs was going mental because i was up and down like a yo-yo so i kind of said well this is what ive bought these for so im gonna use it otherwise im having another night with no sleep again! She was highly against the thought and sajd i was not coming to bed with that on, therefore i was relegated to the sofa -_-. By morning she was understandably very off with me and she was stating how she 'doesn't know what to do' and that we were 'very different people'. Given the chance i should have spoken about it then but i tried to brush it off as usual and made out that i didn't know what she was talking about. We patched up our little argument and i threw out the pack of cushies.
Nothing has been mentioned since about the matter but since trying one of those cushies on i have struggled not to really think about it at some stage. Is it possible that my girlfriend has an idea that im interested or do you think she thinks its something of nothing and hasn't clocked? No one in my life knows about this and i'd find confessing to be the hardest obstacle in my existance. The concept of her freaking out about it teriffies me because if we were to break up she may tell everyone why. We've been together over 3 years, we have our own house and we love each other very much but i don't think this is something she would accept given the previous past incidents.....
Sorry for the essay but felt like i needed to get some of these thoughts of my fingertips.