How do I tell my girlfriend about beeing a DL?!

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CesTheDL

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  1. Diaper Lover
Okay, so I'm sure a lot of people have this issue. But I'm really desperate.
I've for around 3-4 years been into diapers, and Since I now have a better opportunity to wear, I do when possible. This is just a part of me, I have always known, right from the start. That this was a secret for me to keep only. So, now that I recently got a girlfriend. (3. months ago.) I feel like I might need to tell her at some point. A part of me, tells me to just do it. But it's the other part that keeps my mouth shut. I'm thinking of many others:
What if she will leave me cause of this?
What if it all goes wrong and she posts my secret all over the internet?
etc.
I have known her for around 2-3 years before we got together. You see, it's kind of complicated, but to uncomplicate:
I moved away from the city she lives in around 1 year ago or so, maybe 2 now. Kind of blurry to be honest.
We've always been kind of okay friends I guess. But I don't know if that's reason enough to just do it?
I've for a long time considered how, so I will just real quick list what I had in mind:
I thought about writing a letter, but I "pussed" out, I thought to myself I couldn't get myself to do that, as well as just texting.
I thought about just making her find out herself, and then just be ready to reason, and answer all of her questions. This actually seemed reasonable to me, but I don't know.

I REALLY, need your advice.
Please, anything will do.
-Chris.
 
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Hi CesTheDL, thanks for coming here and sharing your trouble, and congrats on having a girlfriend for 3 months, that sounds awesome and I hope the two of you are having fun together outside of your worries about diapers.

My first thought is not to do anything in writing, especially if you'r worried, and not to just let her find out either. Just, and I know this sounds hard, but just sit down with her or perhaps go walking somewhere quiet and say "I've got something a little unusual I want to share with you" and struggle your way through it. You can even ask her not to interrupt until you say you're done if you think it's something you'll struggle getting through a bit, and then give her a chance to ask questions. I know you're scared and if this isn't something you've ever told anyone else about before, it can be, like physically difficult to do it. I remember the first time I told a really close friend and I was shaking like a leaf when I did it. But I'm firmly of the belief that it will go better if you're together and can talk about it, rather than use a format where she gets this information and then is left by herself to try and figure out what's going on.
 

497561832

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It depends. What is she like? Is she conservative or very traditional? Does she generally seem like the kind of person who would be accepting?
 

CesTheDL

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She's very, well.... Tough one. She is not very good at talking deep for a long of a time, which makes these conversations hard to start. Well, about her being understanding, I guess... But It's really hard to say tho´.
 
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What the above poster said is very important. Be honest, I am young and only 19 and haven't been in many relationships but the ones I have been in the main thing is honest communication between each other. I think that is the first step. If you address that you have to be completely honest in this relationship to make this work I think it will be a little easier to get out what you have to say to her. The next thing to address to her is to tell her to here you out completely before she responds. I think it is important for you to convey all you need to get across to her as she listens and just tries to take it in. Then she can respond and ask all the questions that she wants. Finally do not overreact if she seems a bit taken back by this at first. That could ruin the whole talk. Hear her out and respond to her as calmly as you can conveying all you need. Heck you may not even need to go there as she may be supportive of it. That is my advice to you and Good Luck.
 

mayeyeplease

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I told my girl on our first date. I just explained the reasoning in great detail. She will either understand or she won't. But if she truly loves you then she will want to at least try and understand as much as she possibly can.
 
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PyjamaBaby

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I told my wife after 12 years (not the best solution I agree). There is no right or wrong answer. You do what feels best for you and honesty is good!
 

Slomo

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Be up front and honest. Like the last poster, waiting long after you're married is not the best solution.

I would still recommend writing a letter, but hand it to her and be there as she reads it. This way you get the chance to say everything, and you'll be there to answer any auestions and dispell any misconceptions.
 
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Starrunner

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I think honesty is the best option here. Before you tell her, you can start by letting her know that you have something very personal to share with her. Let her know that it is very difficult for you to open up and share this information with anyone. More than anything, let her know that she must be the most important person in the world for you to confide in her this way. If you're unsure about what to say, write it down in advance and have some key points on hand about how to present it to her.

I think three months is a pretty good time to guage how important this relationship is to you and the ramifications of opening up or remaining silent. The longer you are in a relationship while keeping it hidden will only make it more difficult to tell her later on down the road, and she may be upset that you didn't tell her sooner. She is important to you, and so are the diapers. It's a matter of finding a way to keep both in your life.

Keep in mind that it is often difficult for us to accept ourselves with this fetish, so you don't want to just pile the information on her without giving her an opportunity to think about it, to discuss her own feelings, and to ask questions. She may need a little time to process the information. That would be understandable. It may be a sign that your relationship is transitioning, hopefully to a stronger and more open union. It may also be helpful to have some resources she she csn read to help her understand it better.

Best wishes.
 
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