Have you told your friends?

tseaborn

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How old were you when you did?
How did you break the news?
How did they respond?
Are you still friends?
Do you wear around them discreetly?
Male/Female?
Are you DL or AB?
 
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So far no. I've known my best friend since we were in second grade together--over 40 years ago. We've both had our ups and downs in life, and occasionally we'll get to discussing serious or intimate topics, but I've never told him about being an ABDL or liking diapers. There have been times when I felt the conversation might be drifting in a direction where that would be appropriate, but it didn't quite get there. I think he'd be fine with it, but I do worry about his wife. Spouses talk, and despite being in her 50s his wife gossips like a middle schooler.
 
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The big question to ask
what benefits do you get telling your friend(s)?
If you're lucky you will be accepted
but that's playing lottery like odds
more likely you lose the friendship or even worse

We don't discuss what we do in the bedroom with our friends
are they sharing very intimate things with you?
You better know your friend very well before dropping this kind of bombshell on them.
 
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All of my close, personal (I.E. TRUE FRIENDS) have known since these issues were new to me WAY BACK in 2004. My entire family knows as well on top of every single medical professional who I've been under the care of in & out of the hospital plus their nurses, secretaries, you name it...so hundreds of people. NOT ONCE has this been an issue for me, contrary to how I imagined it would destroy my life, social life etc. BEFORE anyone else knew as I did my best at trying to hide it for a couple of months but once hospitalized for a 6+ weeks stint in Oct 2004 there were only so many lies, so many "accidentally" spilled glasses of water/soda/coffee before I had to come clean as I HATE HATE HATE lying to some ones' face!

I wish I could lie and be able to sleep at night as I could and would had made a hell of a lot more money than I did but I was always brought up to tell the truth, even when you KNOW it's going to cost you. It's been among the best policies I've lived by as everyone I know would trust me with everything they own if it came down to it.

For me this is all medical, not desire....besides, how the hell for you hide it when hospitalized for well in excess of 700 days (so far) since Jan 18 2004?

IF I only wore "for fun" or out of desire...I highly doubt anyone outside of my wife or SO would ever know. I simply don't see ANY upside to broadcasting something so personal to anyone, let alone everyone.
 
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I decided to take part in a tv series about abdl a few years ago. And as a result I decided I had to tell my best friend. She doesn’t really understand it. We now just don’t talk about it.
Was the hardest conversation in my life telling her.
 
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SparkyDog said:
what benefits do you get telling your friend(s)?
That's a fair question, and gets at why I haven't told anybody. I think trading vulnerabilities with somebody can be a really powerful bonding experience, but the circumstances have to be just right, and it's difficult to know when they are.

I also think some of us feel like we're not entitled to our secrets just because they're weirder than other people's secrets. That's certainly pretty silly. It's fine and normal to have a private life, whether it's strictly vanilla or pretty kinky. Revealing your private life to somebody simply to assuage your own feelings of guilt is not a great idea, and could convey a lack of discretion that ultimately harms the relationship. Better to strive for self-acceptance in that case.
 
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Amendment to my 1st post:

I feel I'm only telling 1/2 of my life here....BEFORE 2004 and since I was literally being potty trained, I LOVED sleeping in a full loaded "Pamper"! All diapers were called Pampers by everyone I ever knew into my 20s, so forgive me if I use Pampers instead of diapers at times. Pampers haven't been able to fit me since I was 5 or 6 as in not even close! The only people who KNOW that part of my life are my parents (you get caught enough times, they catch on pretty quick PLUS the 3-8 year old mind is HORRIBLE at devising solid plans and strategies!) other than that and possibly my brother (younger by 15 mos, if he remembers back that long ago) is my soon to be ex wife, who I told within 6 months of us dating when we were both 16.) NO ONE else knows that nor do they need to know.

With that being said I have 2 addendums:

1) TELL YOUR PARTNER BEFORE you both have too much time invested! If that's enough for them to walk, you saved yourself a ton of trouble! It is not only unfair to them, but irresponsible on your part to "hide" this and then wonder why the relationship fell apart days/weeks/months or even years later. You read about it all of the time and it all could have been prevented with a little bit of guts and a lot of honesty.

2) IF you wear for pleasure, security, comfort or whatever...PLEASE don't go posting that you want to know how to make yourself physically incontinent OR keep telling people you WISH you were actually incontinent. I'm on a few incontinent support groups and it NEVER fails that there's someone there who isn't IC wishing they were or asking how to make themselves permanently IC. Don't do that! You really wreck the good things going on in many of those groups and turn a LOT of new members off to where you never hear from them again! I get VERY aggressive with those kind of posts on those groups as they don't belong there! IF you want to act like you're fully incontinent, what's stopping you? You can wet & mess at the most inconvenient of times (to see what it's like for those who have no other choice) all day every day and use diapers for every drop of waste your body produces, never to use a toilet again! There's no law against it and outside of medical professionals you can tell everyone you ARE incontinent and they'll almost certainly believe you. Just don't ask STUPID questions or make STUPID comments on SUPPORT groups!! You can't imagine the harm you cause when you do that sort of thing. I have been witnessing it firsthand for over a decade
 
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I told my 3 best friends I know since decades.

They are all very open minded (probably one of the reasons they are my friends!). They are open to LGBT+ even if they are straight themselves.

My oldest friend smiled and told me about his kinks just after (BDSM).
Another just said that it's very good for me as it probably helped me during the most complicated parts of my life.
And the last one just said. "OK so what?". As he was always talking with me about the technology of diapers when our kids were small, one day I did present him an ABDL diaper with hook&loop and a few of my ABDL onesies.
His reaction was priceless, he looked at all the details and told me how surprised he was to see "real baby diapers and outfits" at my size. He couldn't believe how close to the reality it was.
He gave me a very big hug and thanked me for sharing this very personal vision of my life.

By respect to them, I've never been visibly diapered or wearing baby clothes in front of them but I'm sure they wouldn't bat an eye.

Really good friends!
 
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My U-IC was caused by a car crush, long ago. Hiding my car crash, hospital stay and wearing cloth diapers was not possible as family, close friends and co-workers all knew what had happened and what was the results.

I fully agree with CptKirk , above, that non-IC folks use or wanting to be IC is problematic in addition to being hurtful, when silly question get posted on the IC Forum!

A member of the IC forum has recently coined the term: "Okay with Diapers!" This based on our accepting our having to wear diapers to be out and about and enjoying life!

As so well stated above, I never tell others outside of my sizable base group that I am wearing diapers. The near to know is part of that reality. If asked, I simply state: Yes and leave it at that. That said, I am amazed at the number of individuals that ask advise regarding wearing diapers for themselves, or their family members.
 
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There are a few who know that I wear diapers for bedwetting, but they don't know that I actually LIKE wearing them.
 
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EssexnappyMan said:
I decided to take part in a tv series about abdl a few years ago. And as a result I decided I had to tell my best friend. She doesn’t really understand it. We now just don’t talk about it.
Was the hardest conversation in my life telling her.
What TV series was this?? I've never heard of such a thing.
 
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How old were you when you did?
-I was 44 when I told my three close friends and their wives.
How did you break the news?
-At first I told them that I was having IC issues (which I was). Then during the conversation, they were so cool with it, that I told them that I actually love the diapers, and have since I was 8.
How did they respond?
-They were all really cool about it. My best friend and his wife have been the best. She joked that if I needed to change, the supplies were in their daughter’s room. She even told me to watch my beer so I don’t leak on their couch.
Are you still friends?
-Yes, it’s been great.
Do you wear around them discreetly?
-Yes whenever I visit.
Male/Female?
-I’m male
Are you DL or AB?
-AB, and they all are ok with it.
 
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Nope. It's none of there business. One of my main rules is this little kink does not mingle with family, friends and work. There is absolutely no reason for anyone other than my wife needs to know about this.
 
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Nowididit said:
Nope. It's none of there business. One of my main rules is this little kink does not mingle with family, friends and work. There is absolutely no reason for anyone other than my wife needs to know about this.
In my opinion, that's how it should be. It's nobody's business except my own.
 
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I’ve shared this before, but I have had a friend since we were both in diapers (the first time around, haha). We were best friends all through school until senior graduation and then we grew apart going our own separate ways in life. We reconnected about 10 years after graduation and have steadily kept in touch through text since then. We live in different states now so text is basically the only way. Anyways, when we reconnect after the 10 years since high school, he was scared to tell me that he was gay. Obviously he did tell me, but it took some courage for him to say it. Because of this, I told him my big secret about loving diapers. Luckily, he had actually heard about ABDL before so it wasn’t a foreign concept, but he never knew anybody into it. He had no problem with it and even has asked a few questions through the years. He told me if we ever hung out again, he would have no problem with me wearing around him.
 
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PaddedInHaslet said:
I’ve shared this before, but I have had a friend since we were both in diapers (the first time around, haha). We were best friends all through school until senior graduation and then we grew apart going our own separate ways in life. We reconnected about 10 years after graduation and have steadily kept in touch through text since then. We live in different states now so text is basically the only way. Anyways, when we reconnect after the 10 years since high school, he was scared to tell me that he was gay. Obviously he did tell me, but it took some courage for him to say it. Because of this, I told him my big secret about loving diapers. Luckily, he had actually heard about ABDL before so it wasn’t a foreign concept, but he never knew anybody into it. He had no problem with it and even has asked a few questions through the years. He told me if we ever hung out again, he would have no problem with me wearing around him.
You hit the loto there with that friend. Glad you got that. Many telling situations don't go that smooth.
 
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I had to tell a friend after a weekend fishing trip at his bay home. Why? I left two rolled up used (wet only) diapers in a nightstand drawer. I was 60 miles away when I remembered.

I called and told him I peed when I slept, so I wear a diaper at night. And....I left two of them in a drawer because I forgot to throw them out. He was very kind, and took care of the issue. It's never been spoken of since, and I've been back many times.

It's life.
 
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About a year or so after that I had to start wearing !
Both our folks know that I wear along with a few close friends !
It pretty much an as to need to know basis !
 
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Antientmariner said:
What TV series was this?? I've never heard of such a thing.
15 stone babies from 2012
 
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There were a few occasions that I overshared this aspect of my life to the wrong people, and I wholeheartedly regret doing it because it bit me later and I became the subject of jokes by people who I know I can never talk to again as a result. Do not recommend it if you can help it, it's not nor will it ever be worth it
 
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