Growing urgency and trying to hold it.

CrossfireHurricane

longtime complete incontinent
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  1. Incontinent
For myself I usually don't hold accidents, whether they are wetting or BM's. I've always been IC. I guess most longtime IC people don't try to hold back. I think it's normal. They're not a surprise. I can feel it growing and the pressure becomes uncomfortable. Sometimes it happens fast or sometimes slow. But with my experiences, accidents are inevitable. That's why we wear diapers.

When I was a kid I'd try to hold it. Not sure why. Maybe I just didn't like an accident. BM disasters especially when being in public. I think it's just a natural awareness. Who likes other people to know?

I'm sure new IC people are trying to hold it. It's normal. Even myself if I can feel a coming BM accident. If I'm in public I always try to hold it. Wetting accidents are much easier.

For IC people with urgency, do you try to hold it?
 
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I've recently decided to go 24/7. I get sudden urges and my bladder tries to convince me I need to void big amounts of pee. For the moment I'm not having accidents, but the few moments I'm not in diapers are getting difficult to handle. My mom is totally against diapers, so for the moment I'm trying not to wear them when I'm around her. Also, I've tried to go undiapered a couple of times to prove myself that I can "handle it".
I guess I still need to go a long way before I fully accept my new situation.
 
I'm in my early 60ies, combined dribble- and urge incontinence (only bladder) since nearly a year. At the beginning of my IC I tried to use the toilet whenever possible, trying to wear protection as thin as possible. After short time I found that I was arranging my whole life around my IC instead of living my life and decided to change this - wearing proper protection, not hesitating to use it if it's more convenient than interrupting anything to try to reach a bathroom if it's mostly unsuccessful anyway. I've made my peace with my IC and am happy that I can live my active and social life in the same way than before after deciding to wear - and use - proper protection. Fortunately my wife is fully understating and accepting and telling me to do whatever makes me feel comfortable with my IC is OK for her!
 
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CrossfireDiaperHurricane said:
For IC people with urgency, do you try to hold it?
I used to until I realized it was kind of pointless. At this point when I get urgency I usually let it happen right then. It's much more comfortable that way and I barely notice it anymore.
 
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CrossfireDiaperHurricane said:
For IC people with urgency, do you try to hold it?
It depends (no pun intended). At home when a toilet is available, I hold it until I can make it (which is not too long). If however, it is unavailable (bathroom occupied), then urgency wins. When away from home and diapered, I just use the diaper rather than concentrating and suffering. For BM, I always try to save it for the toilet. Fortunately, so far, the # of fails have been few.
 
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I work from home a lot so I generally have close access to my toilet. When I'm out and I know the timing might not be in my favor I'll just wet my pull-up or diaper.
 
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I used to try to hold it until the light dawned and I realised that 24/7 nappies were the answer to a much easier life. I was right about that. But when it comes to messing, I still try to hold it as long as possible and so it can result in an even more massive uncontrollable BM. I've had disaastrous leaks in public like that and although it's rare for me fortunately, if I urgently need to go no 2 I just get it over with and change quickly if I can. It seems to result in much less of a problem in the long run.
 
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CrossfireDiaperHurricane said:
BM disasters especially when being in public.
Thankfully most BM's happens while I'm sleeping. But during the day they do occasionally happen. It's easy in the morning before going to work. Having a messy accident later in the day can be a disaster. Wetting accidents don't require a change unless I've flooded my diaper. Having a BM disaster usually means a complete change (and going home for a shower). As for holding a BM accident, at least for me, I used to hold it even though
I rarely won. Stressful. Since I started using Chlorophyll copper I stopped holding it (years ago). So I have maybe an hour or so before anyone might notice. Wetting isn't a problem unless it starts to leak. It's always easier to just pee (no holding).
 
I had my first experience with strong urge incontinence on the weekend, and it really sucks. Before this, I've never experienced having such an incredibly strong need to pee, and have it happen almost instantaneously.

Technically I've been managing "a type of" (my doctor's words) urge incontinence for 6+ years, where my bladder "thinks" it's empty but isn't, which leads to small leaks. For that reason, I already wear protection all the time, so I wasn't worried about wetting myself. I made it to the bathroom, but about 20 minutes after I was finished - or thought I was - the same incredibly strong "go NOW!" sensation hit, and that time I had no chance of making it to the washroom. What surprised me almost as much as this happening at all is how much more came out. I really thought I had fully voided.

In any case, thumbs up for Dry 24/7 diapers. I've never had anything resembling a flood experience before, and although I sometimes grumble that the tapes could be improved, the diaper worked perfectly.

If there's any point this post it's just to say that for the first time, I've experienced what it must be like to be almost fully incontinent, and even though I have DL tendencies and like wearing diapers, there's nothing nice about real incontinence. It was very unpleasant.
 
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HalMidLife said:
Technically I've been managing "a type of" (my doctor's words) urge incontinence for 6+ years, where my bladder "thinks" it's empty but isn't, which leads to small leaks. For that reason, I already wear protection all the time, so I wasn't worried about wetting myself. I made it to the bathroom, but about 20 minutes after I was finished - or thought I was - the same incredibly strong "go NOW!" sensation hit, and that time I had no chance of making it to the washroom. What surprised me almost as much as this happening at all is how much more came out. I really thought I had fully voided.
That's what urge IC is - I also have no clue when or under which circumstances a sudden urge comes up. Sometimes I can be dry for a few hours, sometimes it's coming 4 times in an hour, sometimes fully voiding, sometimes smaller amounts - nothing I can calculate or rely on. So I'm meanwhile always prepared for the worst and wear proper protection. - and stopped thinking about that and take it as it is.
HalMidLife said:
If there's any point this post it's just to say that for the first time, I've experienced what it must be like to be almost fully incontinent, and even though I have DL tendencies and like wearing diapers, there's nothing nice about real incontinence. It was very unpleasant.
I really got used to it and am able to accept the things I can't change. Good thing with wearing high quality diapers is that they don't feel wet upon use. So, with voiding, it's getting warm, but the wetness is saturated quickly into the core of the diaper and the inner surface very soon feels dry again - unless it's end of diaper capacity. So If it starts to feel wet I know it's time to change.
Be sure, if these things continue to happen to you you will get used to it - it's not so unpleasant as is might have been at the first time. And - with proper protection - it doesn't prevent you from living your life as good as it was before becoming IC. I'm also glad that only my bladder is affected - anything else is more difficult to handle. And I learned that it is better - if an urge comes up - to let it go instead of trying to hold back and getting pain of a slight bladder spasm.
 
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Sometimes in the past, I would try and hold it back so hard to make it to the toilet, that it would give me internal bleeding. That is why I started wearing diapers. Now, if I think I can make it, I will try and hold it but if the pain and pressure become too much, I just let go.
 
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When I first became U-IC, I would try to hold it. But then it would just return more urgently 3-5 minutes later. Eventually, I learned that "resistance is futile!"
 
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My problem trying to hold it (urine) is that on a few ocassions the "need" to go stops and some time later sort of 10 to 20 minutes I will have the most desperate need for a BM that nothing will stop, after that accident eventually the bladder will let rip totally without any warning and it is a flood at that point.
So generally I do not even try to hold on.
 
I have a neurogenic bladder and it's behavior varies determined by the state of my genetic disorder. I self cath four times a day and adhere to a voiding schedule (every 1.5 hours) on great and good days. How I handle an urge is determined by how close I am to my next voiding time. If it's a ways away, I leave my bladder to do its thing. If the time is within 15 minutes, I'll try to hold it if I think I can manage it, or move my scheduled time up if I sense that my bladder is not going to cooperate. It doesn't matter to me if I wet. What matters is trying to manage my bladder to prevent constant spasms or retention.

If I'm having a bad day, there is no trying to hold it. I self cath when I change out of my bedtime diaper in the morning and again before putting on my bedtime diaper at night. The rest of the day is a dribble fest with occasional heavy voids. I stay home, lay low (i'm barely functional), and change when needed.

In regards to BMs, my IBS is currently relentless. If I sense any discomfort I head for a toilet. I can't tell the difference between gas, minor poop, major poop, or diarrhea; it all feels the same and it's going to come out on its own momentarily, whether I'm on a toilet or not. Then there are the times when I don't sense any urgency or passing a BM; it's just suddenly out. When that started was when I realized things were serious.
 
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