For the people that became a little incontinent later on what was your experience like?

Leaf12 · Sep 17, 2019

Several days recently I felt like I had to go pee most of the time(yesterday wasn't bad until the evening when I was drinking more).
Out of paranoia in relation to this I've been wearing liners or pads when I go out and have been noticing little yellow spot in them at some point most days- sometimes its a very tiny yellow spot sometimes ts still small but bigger than a barely noticeable spot. I've had what I thought were bladder infections tones of times in my life and have taken medication for them- but when I've ad them its just been a constant or more frequent urge to pee not the other aspects. After a round of medication a maybe a year ago and the problem not going a way I waited at emergency at someone else's suggestion to get it checked out as they were concerned about the potential of it turning into a kidney infection. I don't remember all the details but after everything the doctor there told me he thought I might have overactive bladder but he wasn't going to treat me for it. I don't know for sure if I have this or maybe a separate problem. I don't have a general practitioner where I live though there are many walk in clinics. Going to the doctors makes me extremely anxious though. However, also out of paranoia, a couple other possible signs, poor diet and some family history I think it would be good for me to also be tested for diabetes at some point. I recognize if the problem persist and feels as inconvenient as it has some days I will have to see a doctor. But for people who are just a little incontinent and haven't always been so what was your experience like at first? How long did it take before you saw a doctor? Did you find a reason behind it? Also, if your ok with answering how comfortable were you with sex afterwards- I'm afraid of if I was to pee during or the awkwardness of my partner seeing a pad there? (My partner knows I have a diaper fetish but will not participate in that). Hopefully this is all just temporary and goes away on its own.

eastcoastdl · Sep 18, 2019

I'd say if it's minor and doesn't go away in a couple weeks, to make an appointment to discuss it with a doctor.

Leaf12 · Sep 18, 2019

Thanks. I will probably end up doing that, but I'm still wondering what others experiences are like if they are similar or not. Its also just inconvenient feeling that way at work.

PaddedStag · Sep 18, 2019

Can't do better than see a Dr. and have the cause of the problem discovered.
That being said?
My experiences were much the same, not counting occasional bouts of IBS that were disastrous in their own right. As the loss of continence continued to worsen, I was already seeing other side effects I didn't think were related to my plumbing.

One piece of valuable advice I'd give anyone becoming incontinent?
Try out and 'Practice' wearing protective clothing/materials in the safety of your own home. Don't just 'Suit-up' and stroll into the big wide world believing you're actually protected from leaks/worse. Kinda gross, but then, that's the way it is.

Leaf12 · Sep 19, 2019

Thank you so much for your input PaddedStag. Since I don't have doctor here I will likely go to a walk in clinic sometime soon. I was thinking maybe tomorrow but I already did something else that I had been putting off due to it being something I'm normally anxious about today so I think I will see how I feel tomorrow. Definitely if it continues after that and I haven't gone to a doctor yet I will go the next time I can.

Unrelated question is everything we post visible to people not signed up with the forum?

eastcoastdl · Sep 19, 2019

Almost certainly they will refer you to a urologist, so don't worry about the first step. It will be painless.

Petya217 · Sep 19, 2019

eastcoastdl said:
Almost certainly they will refer you to a urologist, so don't worry about the first step. It will be painless.

At least physically. But let's be honest: it is nerve-wracking to go to the doc with this. And the first time is the worst. It then gets better little by little with every visit.

Leaf12 · Sep 20, 2019

Thank you
eastcoastdl and
Petya217. I didn't end up being up for going to the doctor today as I was supposed to work later in the day and didn't want to be overwhelmed at work also. I ended up being called into work early so it was good I didn't go today. I was think of maybe getting a book to write stuff down in for when I do go in if my body doesn't magically fix itself.

Petya217 · Sep 20, 2019

Leaf12 said:
Thank you
eastcoastdl and
Petya217. I didn't end up being up for going to the doctor today as I was supposed to work later in the day and didn't want to be overwhelmed at work also. I ended up being called into work early so it was good I didn't go today. I was think of maybe getting a book to write stuff down in for when I do go in if my body doesn't magically fix itself.

A voiding diary might be a good idea. You can even find that stuff on the app stores (both for iPhone and Android), that might be more convenient. You can log both the input (how much you drank and when) and the output (when you peed and how much, made it to toilet or not etc.)
Your doc might find it helpful.

Rob110 · Sep 20, 2019

Hi Leaf12

Sorry to hear you are having IC issues, bladder issues generally do not fix them selves as its usually caused by something else this is why it’s important to see an urologist to make sure its not life threatening. I know it’s embarrassing at first but Doctors deal with IC issues more often then you think.

PaddedStag is correct in saying its better to test your protection of choice at home as there is a lot of trial and error in finding a diaper that works best for you. Save time and embarrassment by skipping the retail brands of diapers and order samples of Betterdry or Northshores plastic backed diapers. Premium thick diapers may seem as an over kill at first but when you can trust your diaper to do its job and you no longer stress when an accident happens its worth the cost.

When my Ic issue first started I tried different diapers and pullups to manage my bladder issue and I went with the thinest most discrete product I could find, but after several bad leaks and self made puddles it took several embarrassing accidents to force me into premium diapers it didn't take long for me to realize my fears of people noticing my thicker diaper were unfounded as no one noticed.

Please remember you are not alone in dealing with bladder issues and do yourself a favour and make an urologist appointment some times if the cause is diagnosed early it can be reversed and its better to find out if its a life threatening issue as early treatment can save your life. I have seen 2 urologists and the tests while embarrassing are not painful and are worth it to rule out any thing bad.

ieyasu · Sep 20, 2019

I'm a DL but I've had a few times where I dealt with minor incontinence. The first was over 20 years ago where I felt like I needed urinate all the time and nothing came out. This went on for a day or two until I was suddenly hit with the most excruciating pain that I had felt in my entire life. It turns out that I was passing my first kidney stone.

The second time happened last year while I was overseas. I ended up with the extreme flu-like symptoms. I visited the doctor multiple times over about four days but never really found out what it was. I was grateful that I had listened to my DL side and taken diapers with me. Even though I almost never use them for bowel movements. After cleaning up from a bout of diarrhea when I wasn't wearing them, I wore them around the clock until the sickness passed. Being sick at home is bad but being sick in a hotel room thousands of miles from home is much worse.

The most recent time also occurred last year. It too was sickness related. I felt like I was having a repeat of the flu-like symptoms but thought I would tough it out at home. After a miserable night, I had my wife drive me to the urgent care. They eventually realized that they couldn't help and I needed to go to the ER. There they realized that I had a kidney stone, infected kidney, enlarged prostate and sepsis. Before the day was over, I found myself hospitalized having had an emergency surgery. The surgery saved my life but it took nearly a month before I almost felt normal again. It's now been over a year and for the most part the side affects have gone away.

The lessons that I've learned is that if something changes, don't hesitate, just go see a doctor right away.

-Ieyasu

Leaf12 · Sep 22, 2019

Petya217 , maybe I'll look that up and see what I find or look online.
Rob110, the leakage I'm currently noticing is very mild so a pad works fine at the moment. Also, my work does bag checks so I'm hesitant to bring the type of pads I feel are more appropriate for the situation. You make good points though.
ieyasu, I'm glad your doing better. Thank you all for sharing.

Leaf12 · Sep 27, 2019

Update- went to a walk in clinic today and the doctor thinks its a bladder infection so I'm on antibiotics now but the sample will be sent away as well.

eastcoastdl · Sep 27, 2019

Leaf12 said:
Update- went to a walk in clinic today and the doctor thinks its a bladder infection so I'm on antibiotics now but the sample will be sent away as well.

Hopefully it clears up soon!

Leaf12 · Sep 27, 2019

Thanks! I hope so too. If it doesn't when I'm done the pills I might give the clinic a call but I hope this just solves the issue.

Tevinther · Sep 28, 2019

For daily management and difficulties having to change pads. Do consider buying incontinence panties as they are marked at around 100-200 ml absorbency and they look majorly better than the male versions. Should last 200 washes they usually advertise.
For daytime management, i currently use tena noir low waist.
They are discreet and fits well under my underwear as they together with drynites are the only pullons i have tried which doesnt bulge at the top.

For men its super difficult to change pads as we lack bins and people dont expect us to crinkle in the bathroom. Hence i prefer a bit more absorbency with the pullons.

Leaf12 · Sep 28, 2019

I was considering incontinence panties in the mean time because I've been having little leaks every day, but I also just do laundry once a week as I live in a basement suite and don't have in suite laundry but rather a washer and drier to use in the landlords part of the house so I think its their preference that I just do it once a week. I really would love to live somewhere with in suite laundry. I will look those up. I was wearing an incontinent pad the other day but it was rubbing against my thigh and really bothering me. It was too big though but the pharmacy I got it from didn't have the size I was thinking and I thought a pad would be better than a panty liner. That's unfortunate about the lack of bins.

Tevinther · Sep 29, 2019

The least visible and durable diaper pants i know are tena lady noir low waist
Always discreet pants and goodnites.

Just realized goodnites and drynites are the same...

Why not buy it online?

Also the Always incontinence pads/liners should pass bag inspections as they are also the same brand as the normal menstrual pads

Leaf12 · Sep 30, 2019

Bought always discreet to wear to bed for a bit and I sometimes buy goodnites as I am a DL and they can be cheaper and cute and I'm small enough that I can fit into though. Oh, I picked up some pads today and hadn't thought about that point but you do make a good point. I don't think I've seen drynites here. But now I'm excited theres a pull up out there with Elsa and Anna on it that could fit me. Tena lady noir low waist looks great by the way. I might end up buying it online but my concern is whether or not shipping is discreet. Do you know if it is for tena lady noir low waist? Hopefully this clears up soon though anyways but if it doesn't or if the issue occurs again its good to know what the best options are and be prepared.

Tevinther · Sep 30, 2019

After re-reading the posts I would like to offer some additional advice.
Suffering from bladder infections, which might also be caused by your small leaks, I think an important help for you would be to remember to use PH neutral creme or soap, which will help counter issues with irritated skin and overall genital health. Depending on the level of leaks, it is also better to change more often with less absorbent products than to be stuck in a pull-on. I would say it largely depends on your daytime needs. At home its easy to change often, but if you are having to stay outside with limited access to a toilet, then a more absorbent product that will keep your skin dry is the way to go. Hence I used drynites/now tena noir, as they are more absorbent than pads and keeps me dry longer.

Also if you have no leaks at night, consider sleeping with loose pants without underwear to allow your skin to breathe. By all means avoid larger DL diapers during your incontinence, as you really need the air for relaxing your skin and genital area.

All above advice was given to me by the incontinence nurses. If you dont receive proper support from your doctors, I would recommend you to start a 3 day liquid consumption/diaper weighting test, which is very helpful for diagnosis.

I don't know where you live but what helped my treatment/handling of the incontinence, it was when I proactively contacted an incontinence nurse, as they helped me immensely accepting the challenges and the diapers. Also the overall advice/treatment by regular doctors I have found lacking. There should especially for women be many places to get advice/help depending on your country. I have no idea how it works in e.g. US with the whole insurance scheme.

Tena's boxing is discreet in the sense that you can't see its a diaper unless you are working in a caring facility yourself. I receive my diapers in boxes without issues. For amazon purchases it should be very discreet even for1 packs, as they are uniformly boxed with the amazon logo etc..