Feeling like I never grew up completely

[LuvToColour]

Does anyone feel like aside from their AB/DL(etc) side, ageplaying, etc., that they never grew up as much as they "should"?

Let me explain.

I'm 26. I have a husband and daughter. she's 6. I find myself constantly getting into childish arguements with her, or getting upset when she alters something I've done or made, or when I want to be alone and she won't leave me alone I get upset. Now, I understand my role as a parent and I do make sure her needs are taken care of, as does my husband, but looking at how I interact with her, It's like I'm just as old as her, but bigger, and can use bigger words.

I don't know how I feel about this. Does this tie into my feelings about being an AB/DL? :growup: aci:

 

[silentdreamer1996]

Even though I'm only 19 1/2, a Godfather, and a Uncle, I kind of ended up giving up on growing up. My earliest memories are from when I was four. Two years later, became an uncle and was told to grow up and act older. Got tired of it after my twin nieces were born (Uncle to 7 kids). Decided "you know what? Why do I always have to be the role model? I'd rather be their childish Uncle who they can relate with and be best friends with." So that is who I am. Even my nieces are over (two are 6 and one is 4), I still pad up, act childish, play with them, and read them bedtime stories. You know what though? Everytime they have to leave, the first thing they ask their dad and my parents is "When can we come back and play with uncle Mikey again?" Heck, even the twins know my secret, because I found out they shared the same secret. Caught them taking diapers from the supplies my parents keep for the younger ones. They got upset when they were found out, so I sat them down, comforted them, and told them they aren't the only ones. I did replace the ones they took and told them to try not to take them in the future, because stealing was wrong.

 

[Zendot]

I agree with Note. And it's something that has become more evident to me in the last few years as I've grown up more and have also turn more to meditation and buddhism, is how childish adults can really be, like throwing tantrums or getting easily angry or upset when they don't get what they want, or have useless heated discussions, sometimes even with children! When they are supposed to be the more calm and mature ones.

It's also something that I noticed quite sometime ago how adults and children aren't that different, adults are just like children but more experienced and confident and less impressionable or gullible, or vice versa, children are just like adults but less experienced and confident and more impressionable or gullible.


Btw LuvToColour, I realize were not all the same and I sympathize with your situation, I don't know you as a person or how you treat your daughter, but from what you've said I do believe that you should try to be more calm and remember that you the responsible adult, which means that you should act like that, don't do like I see many parents do, arguing or talking loudly with their children, just be firm but not aggressive, and stay cool no matter how difficult it might seem, it becomes easier as you pratice it.

 

[siysiy]

Hi

Being little is fun. I am lucky to be able to be little nearly all the time. Having a child must be a very important job and I think you should put her first.

Little you will be with you for a long time. So when you do have time to your self have a little fun with you self.

any way grown up are weird. and they do silly things.

hope this helps

Sisi

 

[magnolia]

I feel like I'm just pretending to be an adult, and has been for my whole life. I made a decision already in my early teens never to get any children (and havent regretted it once since then). Picturing myself being a parent...I just cant do it. Pippi Longstocking as a mother? Um - no.

 

[foxkits]

I think it's more how you handle things.
A six year old will change things they are testing the world around them .
There imagination runs wild on all sorts of things.
Now I feel your little is competing on some level.
So mabey it's more your little need's help also you may be so much a like.
You and her .
So with little ones you can redirect them in way's to defuse what going on.
So maybe you can do that with your little self too.
Like your little is the big sister and must be patience in some things.
Choose your battles.
When it matter's your in charge .
I'm in no way thinking your not doing what you should be doing.
No one is perfect at parenting all the time .
6 year olds can push your buttons at times believe me that's true.
But you having a little can help you interact with your child on a certain level.
6 year olds are a bundle of emotions and so much energy and that can be a lot to handle.
But shouting matches don't win so when it's necessary have to be firm my mom always used to one two three if she went to 3 punishment time in my day it was more severe .
Now of day's it's time out or favorite thing you dont get to do or loss of toy .
Just that you recognize this in yourself speaks volumes that you're aware of what you do .
Children need boundaries if you don't start when they are still first toddler's then they can get out of control when in school . My mom explained why I had to do thing's her way lol.
My mom was great at redirecting us you can to.
Give them a choice if you do this or that but the choices you give you can stack the deck the important thing is they had a choice.
In the little things that do not matter.
There is a book raising the Indigo child by Jan Tober I think lee Carroll I think was a co-author
You sound like your doing the best you can do .
It's not easy to mold that little head of mush in children
Be a good mom to your little inside too.
As for some time to your self have a special craft or toy the keeps her busy.
But only use it at special times so you get a breather.
Explain how she felt if some one always changed what she did and she worked so hard on it .
Your not the only parent thats had this going on lol and not the last.
Your ok In my book.
The best to you