Emotional Issue...

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baby kiffer

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Every summer, I've had issues with getting things done...especially since high school.

I've always been paraded as being such a responsible and self-disciplined person, but this drives me insane...

...I've just realized that I really do not know what to do with myself when somebody is not telling me to do something. I've been trying to get myself to apply to scholarships and colleges all summer, and I've not gotten anything done. (part of the problem may be that I just don't know where to start...and I know how important this is)

I just don't feel motivated to do so. That, and I don't feel that I write well enough...but I'm a 4.0 student (which includes honors and AP Classes)...

...I just don't understand myself...and I'm sure I'm not the only one here with this issue!

So...if you all could be so kind...

I want to know that I am not the only one here with this problem, and I would like to have some suggestions for how to correct myself.

Very confused and in need of help,

~baby kiffer~
 
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KittyKat

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This sounds a lot like me. I just finished high school but I don't feel motivated to take any college classes online (I have other problems so I'm too afraid to go to an actual college.) even though I'm pretty smart. I don't really have any advice for you except to simply push yourself. Just believe in yourself.
 
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baby kiffer

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I guess I've just not grasped that idea, yet.

I need to push myself.

There is nobody there in the adult world, except for me. I suppose I've felt like a failure, because I've not done anything, yet. I just need to get up and do it...although, that's pretty-much what I've been telling myself all summer.
 

quattrus

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I'd say it's more of a matter of finding something to pull yourself up to.

If, as you say, the problem derives from a lack of motivation, you first of all have to set a goal that you want to reach. Once you see it, the only thing you need is moving towards it, but it won't be difficult if you really care about it.

If you're working on something you desire, motivation comes naturally. If you just "push" yourself without aiming at something, the risk is to make random moves and, then, at a certain point, loose motivation again.
 

dogboy

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Part of this is a guy thing. My wife is the highly organized one, and I'm the typical musician. One thing I learned from her is to make lists. What you need to do is make a list of all the things you need to do to get to college acceptance. Writing the required letter is difficult for most people. I went "creative" and the whole college administration seemed to know who I was when I started as a Freshman. You might consider going to someone who helps adults write resumes for job applications. They might be much the same. Remember that you are selling yourself to the college. And don't forget that you are interviewing them as much as they are interviewing you. They also want your money, so that gives you an edge.

Often, colleges give you a list of what they want on the letter. Just go about it as if it were an English paper. Make and outline and hit all of the points. Proofread the sucker, and go to someone you trust to look it over. You should be in good shape.
 

juriev

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With the scholarships- in our school we have the gifted program (I'm in it) the teachers there are VERY helpful when applying for scholarships. We start about 8th or freshmen applying.
 

Peachy

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I don't think you should worry all that much. There will be plenty of people who'll either tell ya what to do, or give you certain deadlines to meeet.

I'm a bit like you - I tend to push boring tasts to the latest possible moment and then get really hectic and stressed to finish in time. However, I find that I work most efficiently under pressure, and if the deadlines for writing a paper that takes about 2 weeks is 2 months away, I won't bother starting immediately. Heck, I even got a prize for one of my last-minute papers.
Who knows - you may get your college scholarship even if you apply in the late minute!

Peachy
 

Charlie

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Get the ball rolling... That's often the hardest step, but everything else sort of follows from that.

Get yourself to a place (not sure what you'd call it) that gives you advice on applying to colleges. You say you don't know where to start with applying, well they'll tell you! Once you've been there, follow there advice straight away and get applying. Don't leave it and allow yourself to become unmotivated again.

I often have the problem of losing motivation with things... Make a commitment, booking an appointment with college advice people will be a good start. I find that if I force myself into being committed to something, it's got a better chance of happening.
 

Allanon

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I have DEFINITELY got this problem.

Except I dealt with it by switching to extreme type B personality (used to be extreme type A) and I stopped caring about getting things done, until the last minute, and even then only if it wasn't going to be too much of an insane job.

I'm happy with who I am now, but I wouldn't recommend that as a very healthy solution :p.
 

ballucanb

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I think you need to find a direction, there has got to be something you want to do, and look into it.

If you not working at the moment, find a job, that will tell you what the real world is about, once you learn just how far your present education will take you it might inspire you to do better, and pick a direction.

Or you could become a bum or a barfly, no education needed, just drinking money and a new liver after a few years. LOL
 

ShippoFox

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I have a lack of motivation, friends, independence, money, decisiveness, etc... I'm 22 and I still don't have anything sorted out. Nothing. And sometimes I look at the world and think "I don't even want to be a part of that dog-eat-dog BS..." No, I'm not suicidal... I'm just disgusted by the way the world works.

If you can do so, push yourself. There's no guarantee that someone will be there to support you and tell you everything will be okay. Or if they do, then they might not support you in the way you need. If you need a push, then they'll be casual and you get nothing done. If you need guidance, then they'll tell you "oh you need to do this!" and not give you any actual help. Just two possibilities.
 

Little2Roo

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Here's a thought

Baby Kiffer, if I may offer my own experience with this very same problem. When I have an important task with a deadline, but can't seem to make myself do it, there is almost always some hidden reservation in my mind, some reason why I don't really want it.

The most common 'hidden reservation' for high achievers such as yourself would be fear of failure. I know that I am intensely afraid of failing and it is often paralyzing. Perhaps you are afraid of not getting the scholarships, or not getting accepted, or making a silly mistake on your application that you will be criticized over. This is just an example.

Perhaps you're sure you will succeed, but there is something else that is holding you back. Perhaps you don't really know what school you want to go to, or don't know what you want to major in, or DO for the rest of your life. The thought of committing to something for a large portion of your life can also be paralyzing.

Anyway, I'm NOT a shrink, just a neurotic over-achiever that has gone through the same thing you are experiencing SOOOOO many times.

:hug: MyWorld
 

Pramrider

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I just don't feel motivated to do so. That, and I don't feel that I write well enough...but I'm a 4.0 student (which includes honors and AP Classes)...
Baby kiffer, if this post is any indication of your writing skills you have nothing to worry about.

As to motivation, I've always needed something to be really interesting to me for it to motivate me to action. If you can figure out what direction, based on degree of interest, you'd like your life to take, the interest should help you cultivate the needed motivation and do what needs to be done to be successful in that course you've chosen.

~Pramrider
 

Little2Roo

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You still there, Baby Kiffer? Do any of our ideas make sense to you?

MyWorld
 

Allanon

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I have a lack of motivation, friends, independence, money, decisiveness, etc... I'm 22 and I still don't have anything sorted out. Nothing. And sometimes I look at the world and think "I don't even want to be a part of that dog-eat-dog BS..." No, I'm not suicidal... I'm just disgusted by the way the world works.

If you can do so, push yourself. There's no guarantee that someone will be there to support you and tell you everything will be okay. Or if they do, then they might not support you in the way you need. If you need a push, then they'll be casual and you get nothing done. If you need guidance, then they'll tell you "oh you need to do this!" and not give you any actual help. Just two possibilities.
21 here, and kind of the same outlook on the world. Sometimes I wish I could just lock myself in my room for the rest of my life and not speak to a single living soul other than my family.
 

Takkun

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I have this problem quite a bit too.

I just say "I can;t get on the computer until I do the dishes". Or, "I have to write 2 paragraphs of this paper before I can go out with friends."

Just say to yourself "I have to apply for this or that, then I can go to the movies, or treat myself to a nice dinner".

Helps me, anyway. ^_^
 

Customizer

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Kiffer, about the scholarships and financial aid, you start here: FAFSA - Free Application for Federal Student Aid

Apply your parents' tax information to the US Department of Education and select a university to go to.

You will automatically receive grant money (fed--Pell and state) that is not to be repaid. :)

As for separate scholarships you can earn:
Use FastWeb.com and Scholarships.com to do searches that apply to the profile you have created. Instant search with complete information. No scams. Recommended by CNN.

If you still need more money (such as in the tens of thousands for the university you want to go to) take the Perkins loans or other super-low interest loans in our down market.

I do hope this helps in instantly guiding you.
 

ForeverSmall

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I toatally know what your dealing with. Getting the grades has been ok for me but the fact that I may not ever measure up to what my parents wanted always bugged me. Having an above average IQ meant I got treated like I was some prodigy. In reality I was so stressed out about my life that I felt I would be lucky to even make mininimum wage or go to colledge. I use to feel like the fact that I was a tb meant I would never amount to anything. A teen baby with parents that hold the bar to high is terrible. Really education is not an issue for us. For most teen babies school is the east part, it is dating, and doing grown up things. Driving is hard for me because it is so scary, school just happens it is not that scary. teen babies have important things to worry about like depression and not living fufilling lives. when I was younger it was mostly a matter of not killing myself because I thought I would not meet everyones expectations of me. Iz am fine now. School is dwarfed by comparison to the difficulties involved in growing up with infantilism. If I am alive today then I have already done stuff way harder than school.
 
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