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Dumb State, County, and City/Town Laws

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MysteriousVisitor

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In Michigan, its illegal to swear in front of women and children.

Interestingly enough, a guy was prosecuted for that a few years ago. His canoe flipped while on a river, and he cussed out the H2O while a family was camping.
 
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It is against the law for a monster to enter the corporate limits of Urbana, Illinois. NO :pika:

Joliet: Town fathers, reflecting the pet peeve of hearing their town’s name mispronounced ‘Jolly-ETTE’ when all local folk know it’s pronounced ‘Joe-lee-ETTE’, made pronouncing it Jolly-ette a misdemeanor, punishable by a $5 fine.

Personally I love the Joliet law and hope that it is ruthlessly enforced.
 

Takashi

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Florida Laws

-The state constitution allows for freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and pregnant pigs to not be confined in cages.

-One may not commit any “unnatural acts” with another person.

-Unmarried couples may not commit “lewd acts” and live together in the same residence.

-Corrupting the public morals is defined as a nuisance, and is declared a misdemeanor offense.

-Doors of all public buildings must open outwards.

-It is illegal to sell your children.

-Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.

-A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.

-If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.

-It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.

-Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.

-Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.

-It is illegal to skateboard without a license.

-When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.

-You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.

-It is considered an offense to shower naked.

-You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.

-Oral sex is illegal.

-You may not kiss your wife’s breasts.

-Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.

City Laws:
Big Pine Key

-It is illegal to molest a Key deer.

Broward County
-Persons may not be “inappropriately attired” who work at hot dog stands.

Cape Coral
-It is against the city ordinance to hang your clothes outside on a clothesline.

-It it illegal to park a pick-up truck in your driveway or in front of your house on the street.

Cape Coral City
-A $50 fine will be levied on anyone who allows a couch to sit in their carport.

Daytona Beach
-The molestation of trash cans is banned.

-Maintaining a car on your property which is no longer in use is prohibited.

-Owning a flower pot with water in it that isn’t capable of draining is considered a public nuisance.

Destin
-It is illegal for an owner of a store to allow another person to pass out free ducklings in front of the store.

-Destin states that a cat that viciously chases passers-by is a ‘bad cat’.

-If you wish to go swimming in the ocean, get dressed in your hotel room.

-Torpedoes may not be set off in the city.

-If you like to ride your bicycle in Destin, don’t lean it up against a tree in a cemetery.

-It is illegal to drive over graves in a cemetery.

-If you notice an ice-cream man attempting to sell his cold concoctions in a cemetery, call the police immediately, for that is illegal.

Hialeah
-Ambling and strolling is a misdemeanor.

Key West
-Chickens are considered a ‘protected species’.

Miami Beach
-Skateboarding is not allowed at any police station.

-Persons face up to thirty days in jail for selling oranges on the sidewalk.

-Termite farms are not allowed within the city.

-No one may bring a pig with them to the beach.

Naples
-Neon signs are prohibited.

Palm Bay
-Persons may not tow a sled behind their bicycles.

Pensacola
-Citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their person.

-It is illegal to roll a barrel on any street, fines go up according to the contents of the barrel.

-A women can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils.

Sanford
-Stage nudity is banned, with the exception of “bona fide” theatrical performances.

Sarasota
-If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.

-You may not catch crabs.

Satellite Beach
-Beer may not be sold after 2 AM.

-Persons may not appear in public clothed in liquid latex.

Seaside
-All houses much have white picket fences and full-width, two-story porches.

Tampa
-Women may not expose their breasts while performing “topless dancing”.

-Lap dances must be given at least six feet away from a patron.
 

Emileigh

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I found one in my state that said 'Tattooing and body piercing is illegal'. If that is true...I should be arrested for having my lip pierced...
 

Lowie

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Heres some

In Calgary Alberta, there is still a by-law that requires businesses within the city to provide rails for tying up horses.

Wetaskiwin, Alberta from 1917: "It's against the law to tie a male horse next to a female horse on Main Street."

Now for some provincial laws

Wooden logs may not be painted.

It is illegal to set fire to the wooden leg of a wooden legged man

You may never use dice to play craps.
 
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Reading through it a bit, one thing that keeps popping up is that people have to buy Television Licenses in some countries, so the public channels can stay funded. :chin:

Pay for what you use, I suppose.
 

dogboy

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Leave it to Virginia to have a lot of sex laws.

It is illegal to have sex with the lights on. They must be off, and the heterosexual couple must be married and in the missionary position.

Oral and anal sex is illegal.

We used to have Blue Laws, making it illegal for stores to be open on Sundays. Most of those have been repealed.

I can't tell you how many of the sex laws I have broken...haha... Virginia is for idiots.
 
M

Mako

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Dumb Canadian Laws.

-You may not pay for a fifty-cent item with only pennies
-It is illegal for clear or non-dark sodas to contain caffeine
-It is illegal to pretend to practice witchcraft

-In Toronto, Ontario, it's illegal to drag a dead horse down Younge St on a Sunday
-In Oshawa, Ontario it's illegal to climb trees
-In BC it is illegal to kill a sasquatch

-Destin states that a cat that viciously chases passers-by is a ‘bad cat’.
Destin shall be destroyed by the kitten empire for this. They ish not a bad cats! We just demand pettings and obedience. :D
 

Charlie

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"No cows may be driven down the roadway between 10 AM and 7 PM unless there is prior approval from the Commissioner of Police."

That's just good sense.

"Since 1313, MPs are not allowed to don armor in Parliament."

Again good sense, or at least at the time.

"Those wishing to purchase a television must also buy a license."

Well duh.

"A bed may not be hung out of a window."

Again good sense, and I'd like to meet the person who hung his bed out of a window and prompted this law. :D

"It is illegal to leave baggage unattended."

"Picking up abandoned baggage is an act of terrorism."

Again good sense, considering.

I'm disappointed, they weren't dumb. :p :(
 
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i never asked XD and i dont want to know either just thinking about it hurts
 

Emileigh

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I guess that they are trying to keep them from getting hurt or something, and holding them is against the law, but they call it 'molesting' *rolls eyes*
 

PuddleFopsKit

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Gotta love Texas.

- When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.
Guess they'll be there indefinitely then...
- It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
Some one should tell my grandpa that...
- Up to a felony charge can be levied for promoting the use of, or owning more than six dildos.
Why the hell would you need more than six dildos anyway? FREAK! :eek:
- It is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel.
All right, I'll just shoot him from the first floor then...
- A recently passed anti-crime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.
What's the penalty for killing someone without notice, I wonder? Death?

In Clarendon:

-It is illegal to dust any public building with a feather duster.

Come on... Clarendon isn't that clean...

Dallas:

- It’s illegal to possess realistic dildos.

Realistic what? Monkey? Whale? I see a loophole in that law...

Galveston:

- Bicycles must be operated at a “reasonable speed”.
Again....need specifics.... A reasonable speed on a bike could be 30 mph...
- One needs permission from the director of parks and recreation before getting drunk in any city park.
Makes sense to me.
- No person shall throw trash from an airplane.
Next time I'm riding on a plane at 300 mph, I'll be sure to not get the urge to open the huge, heavy emergency door and throw my peanuts out.
- Any person who sits on a sidewalk may be fined up to $500.
No penalty for loitering, but sitting on a public sidewalk is prohibited Seriously?
- Landing an airplane on the beach is illegal.
Not even sea planes?

Houston:

- It is illegal to sell Limburger cheese on Sunday.
Hmm...
- Beer may not be purchased after midnight on a Sunday, but it may be purchased on Monday.
Uh... alrighty, then... if you say so... See you on Monday then! lol

Lubbock county:

- It is illegal to drive within an arm’s length of alcohol - including alcohol in someone else’s blood stream.
...the hell?

Mesquite:

- It is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
They should make that a law around here...

Port Arthur:

- Obnoxious odors may not be emitted while in an elevator.
What if your in a Hospital elevator and you have a festering sore that stinks and can't help it?

Some of these state/county laws are just so silly I have to wonder whether they're made up or not...
 
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aww none for lewisville but the chees one im so going to break XD here i come houston o and as for unusal haircute when i lived there i had a mullet and the a afro. XD are those unusual (mesquite)
 

briefboy

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Some of these are just ridiculous, here's Oregons:

One may not test their physical endurance while driving a car on a highway.

It is illegal to place a container filled with human fecal matter on the side of any highway.

Babies may not be carried on the running boards of a car.

Drivers may not pump their own gas.

A door on a car may not be left open longer than is necessary.

An adult may not show a minor any piece of classical artwork which depicts sexual excitement.

Dishes must drip dry.

The “Peer Review Statute” prohibits you from finding out details of any written or oral discussion about your medical treatment.

It is illegal to whisper “dirty” things in your lover’s ear during sex.

Ice cream may not be eaten on Sundays.

It is illegal to buy or sell marijuana, but it is legal to smoke it on your own property.

One may not bathe without wearing “suitable clothing,” i.

Canned corn is not to be used as bait for fishing.

City Laws in Oregon
Beaverton
You must buy a $10 permit to be allowed to install a burglar alarm.
Eugene
It is illegal to show movies or attend a car race on Sundays.
It is legal to conduct a horse race or a symphony concert.
Hood River
Juggling is strictly prohibited without a license.
Klamath River
It’s illegal to walk down a sidewalk and knock a snakes head off with your cane.
Marion
You cannot eat a doughnut and walk backwards on a city street.
 

teddy564339

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I read online that in Massachusetts, it's unlawful to deliver diapers on Sunday. ;)
 

Aidy

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In Massachusetts it's illegal to zip up your sleeping bag.

In Western Australia you aren't urinating in public if it's on the back left hand wheel of a car.

In WA a taxi legally has to have hay in it.

In WA a policeman has to give a woman his cap to pee in if she asks.

A pub has to have a post to tie up your horse.

In Wales, an Englishman can shoot a Welshman from a castle wall with a bow.
 

kite

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How could someone molest a butterfly...? I don't even wanna know..
this might be the reason, but in san diego balboa park area (where the san diego zoo is located), there is a butterfly sanctuary there if i remember correctly. but still just brings up more questions...

In WA a policeman has to give a woman his cap to pee in if she asks.
please tell me this law is in full effect...
 
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