Do You Think ABDL Will Ever Become More Socially Accepted? Like the LGBTQ and Furry Community?

longallsboy

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I highly doubt that mainstream society would ever be as "accepting" of ABDL as other stuff. Most won't really care but there are a lot that would take issue with it especially if they got wind of the more.. less acceptable "ABDL"s. There are those that go too far and can be creepy. They give everyone a bad name, unfortunately only takes one bad apple to sour the basket.
For example, I stopped telling anyone I have Autism, let alone Asperger's.. it was that darned school shooter that ruined that.

ABDL is the sort of thing you only tell people close to you or other ABDL friends. If you think you can go walk outside in a baby costume with a paci in your mouth and a wet diaper on visibly without someone taking offence then that is a bit shortsighted, possibly dangerous. I know some do it but only in your secluded yard, for sure do not walk into Walmart acting like an "Adult Baby".

The more we can keep our padded secrets to only those with similar interests, the better. ABDLs have been in the media before, but most times its a bad portrayal. I've seen a few good portrayals of ABDLs but in general you'll only find that in a documentary and most vanilla people wouldn't watch that.

People are way more understanding of adult babies than Autistic people. This is also something that I have seen others with Autism say too, who are not adult babies. I'm not an adult baby technically either, as I don't wear diapers. Though I do have some childlike inclinations and leanings. I have experiences to back me and my claims up, as I have Classic Autism myself and function emotionally and socially at a 4 1/2 to 5 year old level. If you look on YouTube videos, comments left for adult baby videos are much nicer and kinder than comments left for Autistic people. I've been called the R word zillions of times, by so called "normal" people, it seems. Did you know Albert Einstein was called the R word by plenty of people, even his teachers? Some psychiatrists now surmise that Einstein may have had Autism Spectrum Disorder. He was one of smartest people who ever lived. If he was the R word, then what was everyone else, since he was the 2nd smartest man who ever lived?? Do you realize that most Autistic people are immediately called the R word no matter how smart they are?? I think being bullied has resulted in me getting to the point where I want to wear long-alls and T strap Mary Janes even more. Strangely, people don't seem to bully me if I wear that. Maybe they think they pushed me too far bullying me.

By the way, did you know that Albert Einstein wore Mary Jane strap shoes as an adult in 1932 (and maybe well beyond)? There are a quite a few photos on the internet floating around showing this, some taken by professional photographers back in the 1930s.

- longallsboy
 
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buridan

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What kind of acceptance are you looking for? Here are some possibilities:
  1. When people find out a prospective romantic or sexual partner is ABDL, they won't be squicked out or judgmental. They may or may not agree to participate.
  2. In divorce and custody cases, being ABDL won't be regarded as a negative (and trying to bring it up as a negative will backfire).
  3. Being outed as ABDL at work won't result in getting fired or other adverse consequences.
  4. Choosing to come out as ABDL at work won't result in getting fired or other adverse consequences.
  5. It will be possible to go out in public in subtly ABDL-themed clothing (e.g. a cartoon T-shirt and plain trousers or overalls that obviously aren't for work) without getting negative attention.
  6. It will be possible to go out in public in just a T-shirt and a diaper without getting negative attention.
Some of these forms of acceptance are bigger asks than others. It's one thing to expect basic fairness in custody cases (2) or at work (3). It's another thing to expect the public to react favorably to an outfit that borders on exhibitionism (6).

The reality is that I don't think we can expect any of these forms of acceptance from everyone and in all places. Prudes and puritans will always be with us. Yet I know or know of people who have experienced all these forms of acceptance. (Yes, that includes item 6.). Context matters. You can do things in socially liberal places that would get a negative reaction in conservative places. (The reverse is also true.) It always helps to have charisma.

Among kinky people, or at least among kinky gay people in liberal American cities, I think there is growing acceptance of ABDL. I've been going to leather bars and kink-oriented events for over 15 years. In the 2000s, it was rare for a man in the leather scene to be openly ABDL. In the 2010s, leather bars on both coasts have had diaper nights, and Tykables had a booth at Folsom Street Fair. At this point, I think ABDL is a mainstream kink. That doesn't mean it's a good idea to tell your boss about it.
 

Jim100

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I think that the IC or total IC community will be accepted much better and faster than the strictly ABDL community.
 

DiaperVapor

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I've never heard of the Furry community being accepted, and I hope they never are IMO, that's one thing that disturbs me IMO.
 

dogboy

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I think if we AB/DLs didn't use our diapers, we might find more acceptance but the general public is savvy enough to know that we're wearing our toilet and they probably won't ever accept that. That may be why young people wearing childish clothes may get acceptance, but wearing and using diapers if there's no medical need doesn't.
 

username7

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I think if we AB/DLs didn't use our diapers, we might find more acceptance but the general public is savvy enough to know that we're wearing our toilet and they probably won't ever accept that. That may be why young people wearing childish clothes may get acceptance, but wearing and using diapers if there's no medical need doesn't.
just not in school. i have have dreams of that and i allways check now. lol i dont even go to school(i wear just for fun)
 

SecretlyABDL94

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I know one minority group that is treated by far way worse than adult babies. 😥😥 The reason I know is that I am part of this minority. I happen to have Classic Autism (and also comorbid ADHD). Autistic people are treated in some ways worse than criminals in the free world. I regularly see, and certainly on YouTube videos, much more positive comments on adult babies than on Autistic people. 🤷 And to really be clear about this : People are usually afraid of things they don't understand or that they have no experience of. 🤮 People and society are afraid of the unknown. Autism may be something that is a little more well known now in the past 15 years, but no one knew what that was in the 1980s. People like me weren't given much help or special education back in those days. 😥 Often kids who were more severely Autistic didn't get even get help in those days and basically fell through the cracks of the educational system. I'm in my mid 40s now residing in my childhood bedroom without much a future, still living with my aging 70 something year old parents. Sure, I have a bachelor degree in Geography, and it was so hard for me to get a degree, but that doesn't help me get a job. The unemployment rate for Autistic people is 85%, even for those with a college education or degree. 🤷😱 No minority has an unemployment rate THAT high - not even the worst criminals. The highest unemployment rate not only among disabilities (Down Syndrome, comparatively, has a 21% unemployment rate), but among ANY minority. I don't have any adult rights almost at all, but I don't have children's rights either. This is worse than being a preschooler, because while preschoolers are under the "control" of their parents like I still am myself, they still have more rights than me, and sometimes in some cases, more money to be able to spend on buying things. There is a bit of a silver lining in being a child. Of course, it's temporary, and I'm not exactly envious, as they will eventually grow up and have to act like an adult. But I would give anything in the world to be able to have much more of a variety of children's / kiddie rides I could ride on and being limited to only 3 amusement parks to ride them (the nearest being 2 hours away from me) and the next nearest being a Disney park 6 1/2 hours away, and the remaining one an entire day's plane ride away [Dollywood in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee]). Do you think I wouldn't want to sit my mom's lap and get cuddled, or ride on a ride on toy like Power Wheels or just any no motorized ride on toy? You don't think I would love to have a piggyback ride? Do you think I don't want to stop getting bullied because I am Autistic? If I was little, no one would care that I was Autistic if I looked like a precious little boy....they wouldn't bully me. I love long-alls and T strap shoes and yet have the most difficult time finding them in my size. I don't drive a car even as my attention span is so bad I can't concentrate for over 20-25 minutes. I've tried, but it just doesn't work. You could go into a first grade classroom or perhaps even kindergarten to observe children if you took a class in child development, and the 5 and 6 year old little boys and girls you would see would have far better concentration spans than me. I have had a driver's license for 25 years and it is worth virtually nothing to me, like a sneer at what I've become. I feel like I just went 360 degrees and came back to where I started from - back in my bedroom, after all that hard work in university. Most Autistic people (and even those with Asperger Syndrome) come back home. 🤷😥 This isn't even being a boomerang child....I never had a chance from the beginning to start with. I could have stayed in preschool all my life, never grew up physically, been a proportionate pituitary dwarf that looks like a little kid, and I could have come to the same conclusion. I really think I would have better off being 3 feet 4 inches tall and 40 pounds rather than 5 feet 11 inches and 180 pounds. If Santa Claus could just help me ..... I'm not the only one with Autism who wishes that they were little. Some parents of Autistic adult children have even said to psychiatrists and psychologists of their child that they wish too that their adult child was the size of a child because society would be more understanding of them and set aside their expectations of them and accept them for who they were based on how their developmental age was. It's very sad hearing a parent say that. 😥😭

Most of you are able to act like an adult when you want to or wish to, and revert to being like a child willingly under your control and hold down a job, but I don't even have that. I act like a child 99% of the time without even knowing I am. 😥 Being Autistic, even when I was in university, most of the entire college residence apartment students called me the R word. That includes a lot of people from society. I probably would be a millionaire by now if I got $1 every time someone called me the R word. I've been called much worse names too, even implying that I must be a criminal. I even got rocks thrown at me (in college) by some moron who thought it would be fun to bully me along with his 4 stupid cronies, who should all have been arrested for harassment, but campus police didn't catch them. 😱 Throwing rocks at someone is not okay and never will be. It wouldn't be okay to throw rocks at the worst murderers like Ted Bundy. I should not have to be treated worse than a murderer because I have Autism. Autistic people have some of the highest suicide ideation and attempt rates among any minorities, and it is well documented in many research studied. 😥 I never have attempted suicide, thankfully, but I know Autistic people who have. We even get denied for heart transplants if we need them. It's actually worse than even having Down Syndrome. People are usually more tolerant towards even DS because they are "cute" and look like they are disabled. I got bullied all the time from 5th to 10th grade too, and obviously as I didn't collect children's clothing or T strap shoes back then, that wasn't the reason I was being bullied. Kids just bullied me for the way I talked or walked, or for being Autistic in itself. Those things are not even things you can change. 😱 Hiding the fact I want to wear long-alls is one thing, but I can't hide all the character traits of my being born Autistic. I was never an aggressive child. On the contrary, I never bullied anyone at all. I think 100% of my friends in kindergarten through the end of high school would say that I was a sweet and kind child. I'm pretty sure that even 99% of my bullies would even say in retrospect that I was a sweet and kind little boy. I never fought back or retailiated, either. One of my classmates in high school said recently that I treated everyone with respect and kindness and love, but I wasn't always shown that, that's for sure.

Also remember again, as well, people and society are usually intolerant of things they don't know of. 🤷 Autism is still a very mysterious disorder, even though it is more known these days. I'm not technically an adult baby as I don't wear diapers, but I do have many childlike leanings, which actually isn't uncommon with Autism although that might be partly a result of being brutalized. Society generally is more understanding of things they know more about too. For instance, an actual 3, 4, or 5 year old boy in the West Coast may or may not get teased or made fun of for wearing jon jons or longalls with kneesocks and T strap shoes (T strap Mary Jane shoes), but in the Deep South, like Alabama or South Carolina, most people, including other children of the same age upon seeing an ostensible peer, would say "You're so adorable" and coo at him. 💜💜💜 But those types of clothes are much more known in the Deep South. In fact, it's extremely rare to see a little boy wearing longalls / jon jons or T strap shoes nowadays north of the Mason-Dixon line. It is almost unheard of in the Pacific Northwest and West Coast. A very large amount of parents on the West Coast or in the North (the vast majority) who even have little boys have no clue what a longall is and would never even think about their little boys wearing T strap shoes. Except maybe in England where the royal family's children do. Maybe in some pockets of wealthier areas in New Jersey, or places like Norwalk, Connecticut. But generally, it's definitely a Southern culture thing for sure. I have a friend with Autism in Illinois who collects books on storms and tornadoes. She's actually quite sweet, but she seems to be asexual and is not interested in relationships. Any way, my point is even though she collects those things which to me seem not as unusual as what I collect, she still gets bullied. 🤷😥 Definitely online in the very least. And sometimes she gets bullied by higher functioning Autistic people. I don't know why there is a social hierarchy even among Autistic people. There shouldn't be a pecking order or social strata, but there is. Those who are 17 years olds emotionally and socially regularly seem to pick on the ones "less mature than them", like Autistic people who are emotionally and socially like 12 year olds (like my friend) or like a 5 year old (me). Reminds me of the 18 year old seniors in high school picking on the 14 year old freshmen in 9th grade at PE. If a psychiatrist is going to call an 18 year old that does that more "mature" than the 14 year old who is bullied, or someone is emotionally and socially that age bullying someone who is emotionally and socially like a 4 or 5 year old, if that's called "maturity", I hope to heck I never grow up ever emotionally and socially. Who wants that type of "maturity"?? It would be better off if I wore long-alls and T strap shoes and wore a diaper (I don't wear diapers, but I'm just saying) and slept in a crib than "mature" and become a big bully like that. Society is really messed up.

Take care,

longallsboy
Your story breaks my Heart. I can relate. I have Autism too but just not very severe but there are still things I struggle with. Social skills, and handling pressure mostly. I got a degree in Graphic Design but my dream is Animation. I'm currently working in Newspaper production. I got the job through an Internship with them and I work 20 hours a week part time. But obviously the norm is 40 hours a week, but honestly that might be too much for me to handle. Because of this I only make about $500 every 2 weeks, which isn't even enough for rent! So, I'm still living with my Dad (he and my Mom split up unfortunately) but I dream of living on my own. I also have trouble making friends, I only have 1 best friend, and have no desire for a gf or bf as I'm asexual and the whole idea of sex grosses me out! I'm going to be 27 on the 27th and I just barely got my license last year. So, I'm slowly making progress but still have a long way to go! My Autism holds me back from certain things and it gets me down sometimes. I understand 152% where you're coming from. I'm very lucky that despite my Autism I can still work and drive because some people with Autism aren't so lucky in that respect. I'm so so sorry to hear everything you've gone through. Hang in there.
 

SecretlyABDL94

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I've never heard of the Furry community being accepted, and I hope they never are IMO, that's one thing that disturbs me IMO.
You do realize that furries sometimes merge with our community too right? They're known as Babyfurs. So, I wouldn't be too disturbed by it if I were you. You might run into some here or at a convention, and if you want them to be nice and and accepting of you, then you must be nice and accepting of them. And be careful what you say because what if a Babyfur said they find you/us (an ABDL) disturbing? How would you feel?
 

Saltedcaramel64

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You do realize that furries sometimes merge with our community too right? They're known as Babyfurs. So, I wouldn't be too disturbed by it if I were you. You might run into some here or at a convention, and if you want them to be nice and and accepting of you, then you must be nice and accepting of them. And be careful what you say because what if a Babyfur said they find you/us (an ABDL) disturbing? How would you feel?
I know right? Im not into wearing furry stuff and I dont care to play around with my wife while she does either, but its harmless and silly fun for those that do.
If you get off on cartoonish animal suits, I figure thats just dandy. I get the confusion but why do some people hate them? Wouldnt that hate be better directed at pedophiles? Now that is a sexual perversion we should all discriminate against.
 

SecretlyABDL94

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I know right? Im not into wearing furry stuff and I dont care to play around with my wife while she does either, but its harmless and silly fun for those that do.
If you get off on cartoonish animal suits, I figure thats just dandy. I get the confusion but why do some people hate them? Wouldnt that hate be better directed at pedophiles? Now that is a sexual perversion we should all discriminate against.
Exactly!
 

blaincorrous

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Mainstream acceptance probably won’t come as acceptance of ABDL specifically but as a broader acceptance of the diversity of human desires and the attitude of pre-accepting (or at least not pre-judging) things most people haven’t even thought of.

But this question has been asked over and over. It usually goes hand in hand with the argument that kink belongs in Pride or in more public visibility, by raising awareness by exposure of our community. I don’t think it works that way. I think our acceptance should come by encouraging the acceptance of others. I think members of several communities should band together and press for solidarity of acceptance. ABDL, BDSM, sissy, furries, and a few other niches already have well established relationships. We generally have an ambassador in each other’s territory. I think that’s a powerful tool to bring us along with each other.
 
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