Discrimination against male abdls

Depressesforlife

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Do you think/believe that males in the abdl community have a harder time being accepted as opposed to our female abdl counterparts

And just to clearify; what I mean is would society just tell the men to hide their feelings and suck it up

As opposed to female abdls who may be more accepted because simply put they pull it off better in terms of how they look in their outifts (IMO) (or how accepting society is of it) or the fact that as far as i'm concerned all abdl represenatives in documentaries or documentary films (not social media) from what I've seen seem be cringy/bad represenatives of an abdl

And I dont think most abdls are what the documentaries seek to portray

SO my question to you is this do male abdls get the majority of discrimination or do we both suffer equally with the female side rarely being talked about (IMO)

(if i sounded sexist i'm sorry thats not my intention

And i hope i didnt offend you, i'm just curious)
 

BoundCoder

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I mean, as a guy I'm obviously biased, but I do think women pull the diaper thing off a lot better than men.
I also think (and again, this is my perspective as a guy, so take with salt) outsiders are more sympathetic to women ABDLs than men. With women I think people assume it's some kind of disorder or response to some trauma or abuse, whereas with men we tend to just get lumped into the creepy pedophile category.
That said, I don't really feel to strongly nor care. No desire to be out waving the flag or whatever, and I think it's unlikely we'll ever see mainstream acceptance.
 
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Trevor

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If this is a thing, I think it would have to be more of a factor in the hetero community than the gay one. This is not to say that masculinity doesn't matter to gays but I think the question of what masculinity entails is broader. I've not lost any sleep worrying about acceptance as a guy in such situations, and I have no problem giving acceptance, either.
 

BabyTyrant

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As a straight Male I think it is definitely more likely for a Woman ABDL to get a better response than what a Male ABDL tends to get

I think this is akin to how Lesbians dont seem to get as bad a response as Gay Guys would in the same situations; for instance making out in public is more likely to be viewed negatively if its 2 guys and not as likely if its 2 woman ; I mean I dont care about it like that (like if I'm watching a TV series I dont want to see any kind of Sex Scene) I'm just saying how i feel society acts

I mean I think people should be treated the same in the same situations whether they are ABDL (Male or Female) or Gay (Male or Female) ; bad behavior (in poor taste for the environment they are in) should be treated as bad regardless of any factors.

For example my opinion of anyone in the ABDL community behaving badly is the same regardless of if it is a Male or Female, if their behavior is reprehensible it is reprehensible - just like the classic topic that pops up from time to time with people getting a thrill out of exposing their diapers to the public, wetting themselves in an obvious way, etc.

Likewise if I get any creepy messages from a woman I would treat it the same as if I got those same creepy messages from a guy (like the message i recently got from a guy after a sales posting for diapers I put on Craigslists)
 
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Sheepies

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On a personal basis, as a pansexual female ABDL, all ABDLs look great to me. Though I do learn a little more towards male ABDLs.

On how it seems society views the subject... Both genders get a lot of flack but I do see males getting the most negativity. I would assume it's because it varies so drastically from society's picture of a typical male being masculine and strong. Or because a few bad apples ruin the bunch. You know the types...
 

Azie

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On a personal basis, as a pansexual female ABDL, all ABDLs look great to me. Though I do learn a little more towards male ABDLs.

On how it seems society views the subject... Both genders get a lot of flack but I do see males getting the most negativity. I would assume it's because it varies so drastically from society's picture of a typical male being masculine and strong. Or because a few bad apples ruin the bunch. You know the types...
I tend to agree with you, all littles are cute and look great, and there are very few out there I would consider not good looking. Mind you, I'm not pan sexual, but I have learned that beauty is skin deep, and cuteness comes from within.
 

BabyTyrant

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I think it is because society thinks diapers shouldn't be enjoyed and furthermore society has a harsher attitude towards creepy guys (compared to women that do the same crime; for example if a Guy abused someone Male or Female - people act harsher to them than if the Abuser was a Female) and to some people ABDL equals Creepy and weird.

Heck if people tend to find that a Female Abuser is "HOT" they may not even really think the "Victim" was actually a Victim; they may think of the victim as being "Lucky".

There was an episode of South Park a while back that dealt with this issue (the Female abuser not really being punished because She is viewed as "HOT" ; not the ABDL parts)
 

Evahasgone2

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As a female DL I do see that many men look at female abdl as cute and cuddly and want to be their daddy right away, without even asking if they have a daddy. I am Dl and many men have asked me if I want a daddy, I just laugh and tell them firmly I am DL. I don't want to be a mommy to anyone. I love diapers and use them. If I want a bottle, I will get a beer from my fridge. I put on my own diaper and I bathe myself. I do see that female abdl get treated with much more sympathy than their male counter parts. It goes to say that male abdl's are always looking for mommies and always wanting to tell a friend or a parent/relative about their abdl life. Remember females look cuter in diapers, lol
 

BabyTyrant

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Lol, i cant really say that I believe the majority of guys want their parents/relatives to know they are ABDL or whatever.

I for one was trying to hide it for a long time; but of course parents snoop and my mom found out and it didn't feel good, I didn't tell my younger brother or cousin either

But I got to the point that it's my house, I pay bills and without me the house wouldn't be paid for, so imma enjoy my Diaps regardless and they dont care anyways; but I also cover up and only pee my Diap if I'm around them.

And I would like a Mommy, but I am not always on the lookout either.

Unless you meant to say that that is the perception which i could definitely see but it's not true lol.
 

CrazySmoker

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For vanilla we're lazy, stinky and dirty assholes, if not pedos. That's vanilla mainstream about our club. Here's a lot of job for shrinks and more and more for media.

Taking out whatever is so innocent put diapers and wet them, I (member of club) don't see with good eyes putting us in public by extremists 24/7/365, or - as has been wrotten before - those diaper exhibitionists. All of this is... an extrem. But not all we're extremists. Extremist need come out more or less, depending how far he/she wants. And the same is leave completely adult responsibility switching to baby into very high and unacceptable levels. Why of that is for shrinks.

And yes, I want some real female friend or partner without any need to hide my dark side. Is hard, but may one day I'd find someone. Before that I must do my baby alone. I have no problem do daddy, but later want my baby turn. I see this as something possible, just it'll not be easy, so better is taking all if that with philosophy and take it easy. Life's hard, but we can enjoy every sigle day.

Finally I can't find discrimination against against ABDL males, if someone feel that, so tell me why.
 
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MandyBear

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Do you think/believe that males in the abdl community have a harder time being accepted as opposed to our female abdl counterparts

And just to clearify; what I mean is would society just tell the men to hide their feelings and suck it up
As opposed to female abdls who may be more accepted because simply put they pull it off better in terms of how they look in their outifts
To better understand this you have to look at how society as a whole looks at & treats Males & Females.
We still live in quite a male dominated society, granted its a much better one today,
but there are still huge differences in how males & females are viewed & what is accepted & excepted behaviors for both.

Because women are seen as the weaker sex, fragile, emotional, someone to be cared for, blah blah blah, basically more or less like children.

The biggest example [which leades right back to AB/DL] is how we're able to dress because of this.
Just look at the junior/women clothing sections compared to men's section.
Hello Kitty, Disney, Pixar, unicorns and cute kitties, lol.
It's perfectly acceptable for a woman to dress in younger, more child like clothes then for guys.

So seeing a girl dress or act much younger, even in babyish clothes and/or diapers really isn't that far a stretch.
Plus it tends to be far less a sexually driven activity with girls then it is with guys which also leads to the "creepy factor" for men.

PS: When a girl does this it seems the common vanilla reaction usually leans towards it being done for mental, emotional reasons, IDK more a supportive thing then for any sexual reasons.
 
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Daddy Niles

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Yes, absolutely, but It's not unique to AB/DL stuff. You can pick any fetish or alternative lifestyle and the worst and most predatory motivations for it are typically ascribed to men while the best motivations or a dismissive attitude is typically taken when it comes to women. That said, it's somewhat less of an issue for gay men than it is for straight men, and for that and other reasons (like there being few mommies in proportion to the ABs that want them) straight AB/DL guys definitely have my deepest sympathies. I'd offer to baby straight ABs or be a caretaker for them, but I'm pretty sure none of them would actually want that--not an enviable position, for sure.
 

RubberJin

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From where I'm sat there's a few factors;
  • Society is more comfortable with Women being cutesy than men, it's more easily accepted/processed.
  • Men trying to be cutsey can fail miserably and come across as really creepy / sinister / potentially predatory
  • A lot of men aren't great at judging this sort of thing and make it weird
  • A big hairy dude pretending to be a toddler is very few people's idea of cute or sexy
  • ABDL and other fetishes are viewed as weird by the general population and trying to pretend otherwise is daft.
  • ABDL is not a very sexy or romantic fetish, it's not dark and sophisticated like BDSM can be portrayed. No-one's writing "50 shades of baby powder" and getting suburban moms all hot and bothered over the idea of putting a dude in a diaper in the blue room of playpen and changing table
  • ABDL, Furry, and other fetishes attract more than their fair share of, for want of a better term, cringey neckbeards with poor social skills.

I must be clear before I get flamed to death that I believe everyone should be able to be themselves, do what they like, live their lives, fly their freak flags, etc. etc. but sometimes you've gotta just admit that, no matter how much you personally enjoy it, a grown man in a onesie and soiled diaper is just a totally un-appealing cringe-inducing image for 99% of the population and that's not likely to change.

I don't think I'm discriminated against at all, but I'm under no illusion that I look anything other than a bit of a prat in a nappy.
 

CrazySmoker

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My friend sent me something very good to smoke and I realized a few strange idea, but it may work, is not so expensive. Starting production of black coloured diapers as a normal medical stuff. Before or later it'll be probably accepted by users, indifferent if are ICs or not.
Lot of people like black clothes, so Why is so expensive and difficult to find this kind of stuff ?!

Someone of Big Bosses from diaper industry reads adisc ? - I've a job for them 😱
 
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DanielW

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Its kind of odd how the dynamic has shifted over time. In the early days of the internet, there weren't many female ABDL's publicly identifying themselves. There wasn't anyone to discriminate against in those days (it hard to say exactly what I mean) . There was kink shaming, sure and the rare reports of guys getting caught in public. I don't think we did discriminate much against each other at least. It was a smaller club / circle.

It's relatively new for ABDL stuff to only be a "girly" thing, or only for under 25's etc.
 

MandyBear

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In the early days of the internet, there weren't many female ABDL's publicly identifying themselves.

It's relatively new for ABDL stuff to only be a "girly" thing, or only for under 25's etc.
You have to realize a few things though.
In any male dominated subject. Things like kinks or gaming being the Big Two is was wise to hide the fact you were a woman.
And with anything of a sexual nature we tend to be less vocal about it then men.

The wonderful world of Kink & all its related subjects was not something most people talked about, but it is more widely accepted today.

Add in the fact that the "under 25" crowd grew up with Google, smartphones, gigabyte internet, blogging sites like Tumblr, ect.
Its a completely different world then it was 20 years ago, or even just 10 years ago.
The Web just celebrated its 30th birthday & is prob still trying to figure out how to adult, lol.
 

BinkyBoi

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As a male ABDL, the most hate I got were from women within the DDLG community. Two in particular who were probably camgirls appropriating the ABDL community for profit but they had a very strong following. One of them constantly harassed me on Tumblr a few years ago, saying I’m gross and creepy for being a man who likes pacifiers, bottles, and toys. Basically the role of “Little” was only acceptable if you were a woman. Saying things like ABDL doesn’t exist because it’s only DDLG, and relationships in which the males were submissive weren’t as valid as DDLG. I got into huge fights with them over this to the point my account I had for over 5 years was disabled and deleted from being reported too much. It’s why I have a severe dislike towards the DDLG community for accepting that kind of BS.
 
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DanielW

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As a male ABDL, the most hate I got were from women within the DDLG community. Two in particular who were probably camgirls appropriating the ABDL community for profit but they had a very strong following. One of them constantly harassed me on Tumblr a few years ago, saying I’m gross and creepy for being a man who likes pacifiers, bottles, and toys. Basically the role of “Little” was only acceptable if you were a woman. Saying things like ABDL doesn’t exist because it’s only DDLG, and relationships in which the males were submissive wer’re as valid as DDLG. I got into huge fights with them over this to the point my account I had for over 5 years was disabled and deleted from being reported too much. It’s why I have a severe dislike towards the DDLG community for accepting that kind of BS.
Yeah, that's kind of what I meant in my earlier post...its like forget about DDLB unless you're 20. fit a certain body type, etc.
 

Trevor

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As a male ABDL, the most hate I got were from women within the DDLG community. Two in particular who were probably camgirls appropriating the ABDL community for profit but they had a very strong following. One of them constantly harassed me on Tumblr a few years ago, saying I’m gross and creepy for being a man who likes pacifiers, bottles, and toys. Basically the role of “Little” was only acceptable if you were a woman. Saying things like ABDL doesn’t exist because it’s only DDLG, and relationships in which the males were submissive weren’t as valid as DDLG. I got into huge fights with them over this to the point my account I had for over 5 years was disabled and deleted from being reported too much. It’s why I have a severe dislike towards the DDLG community for accepting that kind of BS.
I'm sorry you had to deal with that. It's so easy to feel like you're not good enough (for whatever reason) and I think it's really abominable to try to make anyone feel like they're not valid in this desire. Some people are going to be hateful and wrong but we just have to keep going and find the good.
 

MandyBear

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As a male ABDL, the most hate I got were from women within the DDLG community.
Two in particular who were probably camgirls appropriating the ABDL community for profit
It’s why I have a severe dislike towards the DDLG community for accepting that kind of BS.
I feel sad that happen to you and share your dislike of anyone appropriating/exploiting any kink purely for profit.
Its been my experience that the DDLG, [As well as DDLB, MDLB, MDLG] groups as a whole do not share their opinions.
They are usually a very friendly and welcoming group of people.
Those groups usually do not have much tolerance for the behavior of people like that.
Do not let the self centered misguided thoughts of a few ruin a whole group of people for you.
 
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