Diapers and shame

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Saga

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Hello guys,

First of all, i love wearing diapers, i'm mostly a DL but also slightly AB (got some dolls i really love and like to play little sometimes). I have one problem with wearing diapers though, and that is this: Everytime i wear a diaper and decide to
orgasm i always, always get really embarrassed directly after it. Then i think like:
How disgusting am i, and why the **** did i do this and stuff like that.
I only have this when i have done a thing with diapers though, for instance,
as long as it doesn't have to do with diapers i don't get embarresed from it.
I've learned to accept that i'm a DL by now and that i do also (sexually) like to
use my diaper, which i didn't want to accept in the past.

Can anyone help me to overcome this problem?

Thanks in advance,

Saga.
 

PaddedInEastvale

Straight Diaper Lover
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I definitely used to have that guilt when I first started to indulge in my DL side. I don't have any advice to overcome it, but I can tell you that my guilt went away little by little and now I have no guilt for wearing/using (sexually or non sexually) my diapers. Well, there is still the little guilt I have knowing that my wife hates that I like to wear diapers, but that's more a her thing rather than a me thing.
 

dlissexy

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sometimes that can be the pleasure. It feeds into the heightened emotion. I personally feel more anxious about leakage an smells as I always wet spontaneously (without me knowing I am doing it) and have the occasional series of spontaneous orgasms too. Then the fear kicks in, but its only a problem if you let it be one... I guess. The only other thing is to know when to indulge and when not to.
 

Trevor

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This is a known thing: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post-coital_tristesse

It used to weigh heavily on me but not anymore. At some point, I just accepted that it's weird but that's okay. Everyone has unique preferences and ones like these are perfectly fine to express on your own or with other consenting adults. Have fun!
 

BrumNappies

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Ok,

There are many issues to confront here. I have worn nappies 24/7 for just over 5 years, I have a girlfriend who wets at night with me. We are all adults, I have to wear, but also get highly aroused when wearing, she just wears and wets as it saves her using the toilet at night and she sleeps better.

However, it likes anything in life. Something that is deemed as a fetish (When people who look in don't understand), can and all make you feel a little degraded after you have climaxed. Its like those people who chest in relationships, people who watch porn, its human nature and nothing to be ashamed of.

NONE of us should ever feel one iota of guilt about wearing, it does hurt anyone, it makes my life easier. I have got to the stage in my life now, where i don't advertise it, but I don't give a monkeys if someone sees it, I always carry my girlfriends handbag into the disabled toilet to change, when confronted again not two weeks ago by an elderly couple, i told them I was off to change my nappy.....they didn't know what to do with themselves.

Believe me, people are far more embarrassed about the whole thing if your blunt, so don't feel guilt or shame, nothing to warrant that!
 

Prairie

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I approach it by looking at the source of the conditioning and ideas from others that there's something wrong about it. It's something foreign and I put my foot down on accepting others' issues with the world as my own. It might involve having to question your basic respect for people who push this in your life. I don't know any other way to get around the choice of being under their thumb or being authentic and accepting of yourself.
 

Angelic

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I wouldn't say "I'm off to change my nappy" if I were you, it sound like estabishitism and that you are rubbing this into people's faces, don't get offended but just saying. I would simply say "back in about 15 minutes" instead of I was going to change.

I am simply being blunt by telling you that saying "I'm going to change my nappy" is too much information, especially the fact you called your incontinece wear a "nappy" which is name usually reserved for baby and toddler incontinece wear, I wouldn't walk into the pharmacy and ask for "adult nappies", for me saying the word "nappies" or "nappy" when you are clearly not talking about getting any for a baby or toddler, means that person has a fetish and it sounds creepy. There again I don't to offend you, I want to save you from being teased, harassed, laughed at or even worse accused of pedophilia and taken to court. I don't want to argue since everybody here is like a friend to me.
 

BrumNappies

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I wouldn't say "I'm off to change my nappy" if I were you, it sound like estabishitism and that you are rubbing this into people's faces, don't get offended but just saying. I would simply say "back in about 15 minutes" instead of I was going to change.

I am simply being blunt by telling you that saying "I'm going to change my nappy" is too much information, especially the fact you called your incontinece wear a "nappy" which is name usually reserved for baby and toddler incontinece wear, I wouldn't walk into the pharmacy and ask for "adult nappies", for me saying the word "nappies" or "nappy" when you are clearly not talking about getting any for a baby or toddler, means that person has a fetish and it sounds creepy. There again I don't to offend you, I want to save you from being teased, harassed, laughed at or even worse accused of pedophilia and taken to court. I don't want to argue since everybody here is like a friend to me.

I don't like the word Diaper, I wear adult nappies as I'm English. It's what I wear, I'm not ashamed of it, I don't tell people, but I'm also not ashamed if asked and especially for those who wonder why people without a physical disability should be using a disabled toilet.

I could not and no one on here would ever be taken to court for wearing a "Nappy", its what my continence nurse calls them, its nothing to do with children, its a product that i have to wear, end of.

If people want to make fun of us for wean nappies, diapers, pads or whatever our pet names for them are, then let them. I have never been afraid of what i am and what i have to wear and its great fun to see the shock and embarrassment on their faces when someone looks into my girlfriends handbag and see an adult nappy and doesn't know how to react.

The world is normally to busy to even take notice of what we wear and how we sue them, but for those nosey folk who like to stick their two pence worth it, I always give as good as i get x
 

dogboy

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I think this is typical behavior for younger diaper wearers. It certainly was for me, but as Trevor said, it weakens as we get older. I think repetition of wearing, using and masturbating makes it easier to accept one's self. Now, after that pleasurable moment, I take my diaper off and get cleaned up, but I'm usually diapered the next day. It's not because of acceptance, but diminished desire. The desire returns the next day. You'll eventually get there.
 

Argent

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lots of us go through it Saga, usually when we are younger but the highs and lows balance out as you get older and stop being both as influenced by what you might think the majority accept and crashing at the end of a climax.

We accept you here BTW, enjoy your diapers (heaven knows you are stuck with them now) and just let the useless guilt slide off you when you realise how wonderfully convenient diapers can be for absorbing even that kind of mess.
 

ArchtopK

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Hi. At 18 this can be a struggle. Diapers will compete with other aspects of your life that produce sexual desire. That is what I think causes the conflict. There is the sense that sex is something you share with another person. But diapers are so very intimate and can easily win someone over. The progression occurs very slowly over a long period of time. So you still have time to figure it out. I wish we had the internet when I was little. having to wait until 1997 to find out that there were others the same as me, was an awful long time.
 

Saga

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Thanks for the tips guys. So i'll just have to keep on going wearing them and it will get better? I started wearing diapers like a year ago, i knew from when i was 8 already that i loved diapers, there used to be a pair in my closet but when my mom had found out that i wore them she threw them away. After that i still really had the urge to buy them but i was waaaaay to afraid to actually do so because in my country you can only buy them at pharmacy's and baby diapers at drugstores, which i bought a couple of time but they were the worst xD. I hope it doesn't take too long for me to get used to it though, i really like diapers but feeling so emberrassed is not nice :/. I know that i shouldn't feel too ashamed of it, as it doesn't hurt anyone nor me but its just that my mind doesn't accept it (yet).
I still live at my parents house and even my mom has accepted that i wear them (she found out after some time while cleaning my room, while i didn't want her to clean my room....). She was fine with it though which is really, really nice and lucky for me.

Thanks for all the advice guys :). I hope it'll get better.
 

Cloud

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Through reading tons of testimonies here on adisc, I came to find that I was not alone with your same dilemma. It is very common to have feelings of shame and guilt directly after diaper play and masturbation. Most times I felt as though i had awoken from some sort of trance with a 'what have I done..' mentality. But truthfully, the more I progressed with self acceptance of my fetish, the more I was able to combat the shame and guilt.

If you are really struggling with these feelings, what I've done in the past is choose an activity to do for right after your diaper play beforehand. For example, sometimes I knew I would beat myself up afterwards so I premeditated playing a video game for afterwards. Upon completion, I had garbage bag ready. This made the clean up easier and quicker so I could sit and decompress while I played a game for a little. During this, my mind kind of graced over any guilt.

Also, give yourself the freedom of choice. "I'm going to take a break" or "This is okay. No worries". Even if you don't mean it, it's good reassure yourself that you are in control. Part of these guilty and shameful feelings are that you feel like you 'can't help it', but thats not entirely true.

Any way, it's perfectly normal and healthy for a diaper lover to get release from enjoying a diaper. No worries!
 

SpAzpieSweeTot

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I wouldn't say "I'm off to change my nappy" if I were you, it sound like estabishitism and that you are rubbing this into people's faces, don't get offended but just saying. I would simply say "back in about 15 minutes" instead of I was going to change.

I am simply being blunt by telling you that saying "I'm going to change my nappy" is too much information, especially the fact you called your incontinece wear a "nappy" which is name usually reserved for baby and toddler incontinece wear, I wouldn't walk into the pharmacy and ask for "adult nappies", for me saying the word "nappies" or "nappy" when you are clearly not talking about getting any for a baby or toddler, means that person has a fetish and it sounds creepy. There again I don't to offend you, I want to save you from being teased, harassed, laughed at or even worse accused of pedophilia and taken to court. I don't want to argue since everybody here is like a friend to me.

Honey, a nappy, is a nappy, is a nappy, and we know it. My sister and I are American, so we say diaper instead of nappy. We're actually more offended when nurses call them something separate. It looks like a diaper, has the same function as a diaper, and that's what my completely incontinent, not-a-fetishy-bone-in-her-body sister has always, and to this day, prefers, to call them.

When a nurse says, "let's get a new brief on you," she looks at her funny, and says, ma'am, I'm okay with myself, it's a diaper," and, if we lived in a part of the world where they were called nappies, that'd be fine by her, too. I asked.

In absence of baby or toddler sizing, it's just an adult diaper. With the presence of a cute print, and adult sizing, it's a diaper for an AB, Little, and the DLs who like a bit of shame, but still a diaper. As long as my sister isn't put in something baby printed, she's fine. She knows, "diaper," or, were she in Nappiland, "nappy," doesn't automatically mean baby.

Is there really such a separation culture in parts of the world where it's called a nappy, that a person can't go into, like, Boots, ask where the adult nappies are, and be taken to the incontinence section without a funny look for calling it an adult nappy? Over here, they'd take you to the incontinence section of Sam's, without saying pedo. Even online incontinence shops that don't cater to us specifically, say, "adult diapers," over here.

Don't pee on incontinent peoples' legs, and tell us it's raining! Do you know how many medically incontinent people have gotten the wrong products because of medical paraprofessionals using coverup language?! What's wrong with with calling things what they are? I'm not yelling at you, sweetness, I'm angry at the whole situation!

I know of someone who is blind and medically incontinent, and it was her first phone order. She asked for adult diapers, and the lady on the phone, in an effort not to cover up how shameful and dirty incontinence is supposed to be, said, "Do you mean absorbent undergarments?"

The incontinent lady, not realizing what she was about to get, and thinking she'd been clear enough, said, "Sure."

She recieved adult pull-ups, but still, assuming she'd been clear about needing full protection, by saying she needed adult diapers, which cover fully, thought she'd be protected. She obviously wasn't. Her nerves don't work well enough to give her any stopping power at all. Pull-ups aren't the right product for her, but because of continent people's perception that it's so shameful and dirty as to require a whole other set of words, she got the wrong thing.

In another case, someone had the exact opposite problem from the first incontinent lady I talked about. A son was looking for adult pull-ups for his elderly, post-surgical, mom. He saw the words, 'absorbent briefs,' and thought,"Okay, briefs are underwear, so I'm ordering absorbent underwear."

He later said in a review, "They're diapers, not briefs. My mom cried!"

Let's stop coverup language. It's confusing, and sends the message that we should be ashamed. Continent people came up with it. We did not.

He wasn't shoving it down Joe Public's throat. He said a non offensive word in a group of like-minded people. If he can't say it here, where's his soft place to fall? We're all adults here.

Saga, don't feel badly about what works for you sexually, either, dear. They might just be that comfortable and soft on you, and maybe you feel, "taken down a peg," enough so, that good stuff happens, and good stuff is good stuff, and it's your flavor, so, you're fine. :grouphug:

And let your Brit flag fly! It's an adult nappy, for goodness sake!
 
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DLMelissa

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Hello guys,

First of all, i love wearing diapers, i'm mostly a DL but also slightly AB (got some dolls i really love and like to play little sometimes). I have one problem with wearing diapers though, and that is this: Everytime i wear a diaper and decide to
orgasm i always, always get really embarrassed directly after it. Then i think like:
How disgusting am i, and why the **** did i do this and stuff like that.
I only have this when i have done a thing with diapers though, for instance,
as long as it doesn't have to do with diapers i don't get embarresed from it.
I've learned to accept that i'm a DL by now and that i do also (sexually) like to
use my diaper, which i didn't want to accept in the past.

Can anyone help me to overcome this problem?

Thanks in advance,

Saga.

I have the same problem, not only with Diapees though, any time I get aroused. I end up avoiding all kink and fetish stuff for a couple days before i come back to it, it's getting better though!
 

ST50

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I don't feel any shame or self disgust now I am truly happy in my nappy and make no effort anymore to hide the fact I wear nappies all the time.
 

ArchtopK

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there used to be a joke that sex is a lot like banking, after withdrawal, you lose interest.
 

Tetra

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Nurses in the Hospital are trained to say "let's change your Attends" no matter what diaper the hospital uses, so as not to offend anyone, I told the Nurses I'm 48 and Incontinent what offends me is the people who will do back flips to avoid using the word diaper, they are not briefs or absorbent undergarments or any of the crap people call them, if you are old enough to need an adult diaper you better be old enough and mature enough to say so, but that is probably expecting you much out of the general public.

Sent from my SM-T810 using Tapatalk
 

SpAzpieSweeTot

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There's also a chance I'm missing something cultural. In America, the word diaper isn't necessarily diminutive. When we want to make it cutesie and babyish, we might say diadee, or diapie, or some other cute thing, but only to kids, (only for those of us who find ourselves looking after them,) or people who know how cute and tiny our spirits are.

Would walking into, let's say Boots, and asking where the adult nappies are, be the equivalent of walking into Walgreen's and asking for diadees big enough to fit? Basically, is nappy inherently diminutive?

 

MaxToddler

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I'm not ashamed to wear diaper on me now, though at the first time I affected by incontinence, that was very embarrassing because i must wearing diaper at age 7.

but I'm now starting to feel the opposite, where I feel comfortable and protected because my mommy always care for me to change my diaper every night.
 
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