Confused about non binary, questions (this might be triggering for some)


Est. Contributor
Adult Baby, Diaper Lover, Little
And another thing I find interesting is how trans kids seemed to be aware of their gender before age 3. I was not aware of my own gender until age 5. I didn't know only boys had penises and girls didn't have one and once my mother explained it to me, that explained why mine looked different than my brothers and why my baby cousin had the same privates as me and I thought babies had penisis and then they fell off lol. I also thought my dad looked weird down there until my mom explained he was a boy. This is how cis gendered kids learn about sex, they learn about between their legs that determines their gender and then they learn that women have boobs and guys don't. But I guess that is what gender dysphoria is, they just know their own sex and gender before they are even taught pronouns and sex while cis gendered kids have to learn this stuff?
I can explain this from personal experience. You do not have to know what genders are or the private parts linked to that to feel the dysphoria.
this time stamp starts to explain that.

I guess it varies with person to person with degree of awareness of the world. At this age you can be very well aware of the "gender norms" that society puts into place. You rejecting them, and wanting to do something else causes the dysphoria. This is more common in M to F because like you explained yourself, it is way more socially acceptable for a girl to like boy things and that is simply called "tomboy" But when you are a guy liking girl things your teased to hell being called sissy, you can even be mocked with how you sit and other small gesture mannerisms. (I had to ignore a lot of emotional hell in grade school)

For me, it was more like hiding everything, in my mind it was always "stay away from liking that, not allowed" even if I did not have the vocabulary to speak such at the time.

There is something I will admit not knowing, and that is can very young transgender kids, like at age 3, can do so without having dysphoria. That really depends how they come out and how willing the parents accept them. I am willing to bet though, you see young transger kids due to a high dysphoria. If you are still confused what dysphoria is, go to 8:02 in that vid, that is not simply being trasnsgender anymore, that is dysphoria. (along with the given time stamp making her take all those pills due to mislabeled physiological problems)
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Est. Contributor
Diaper Lover, Incontinent
It is possible to be nonbinary and still be female.

In the first place, nonbinary is a gender identity (or collection thereof); female (assigned female at birth) is a physical sex. You can have one sex and another gender.

In another respect, 'nonbinary' in terms of gender simply means 'not aligned with one of the two binary genders'. You can lean more in one direction while still not actually feeling part of the gender in question. Some people disagree with this because they feel like if someone is 'more masculine' then they are a man, and if they are 'more feminine' then they are a woman; i.e., that those two genders cover the entire spectrum.

Personally, I feel that 'man' and 'woman' are actually highly restrictive and only take up small areas near the ends of the spectrum. If by 'female' you mean 'having a more feminine gender identity, which may or may not be that of cis woman' then yes, it is possible to be both nonbinary and female.

It is not possible to be both nonbinary and cisgender. Nonbinary is a collection of gender identities; cisgender is a set of two gender identities, which form the 'binary' in question.

One can be nonbinary and still dress as a cis woman. Gender is what you feel, not necessarily what you perform.

However, I would caution that gender isn't only stereotypes. As a nonbinary person who presents masculine, I have always felt a disconnection from cis men which goes deeper than simply not conforming to the same stereotypes. I feel we are fundamentally different people.

Whether one can be nonbinary and not identify as one depends on what you mean by 'identify'. 'Nonbinary' is simply a label; it can't be applied to you until you decide it's the best description of you.

However, if you mean 'can a nonbinary feminine person just say they're a woman if asked their gender,' then yes. You are under no obligation to accurately disclose your gender to people if it is not somehow materially relevant to them (and I can't imagine how it would be).