Confused about myself!

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Dashsanta

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  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
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Hey everyone!

So I am not sure about being a sissy girl! I am a straight guy and I know I am defiantly not interested in men.. However I do like being a sissy girl!

I like wearing girly diapers, bras, panties, dresses, skirts, girls tees, and shorts, and anything else girly! And I do like acting girly and being treated like I little girl!

I also don't have a lot of sissy friends, or people accepting of this to talk to about this!

I don't know what to do..
Help!

If you could respond here that would be great!

Could really use some help'
 
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Just embrace it! Shortly after I came out as bisexual, my boyfriend decided to surprise me. We were at my house, just the two of us, so of course I was diapered. He got up to "go to the bathroom" and apparently snuck into my room. He returned wearing my clothes and offering to be my girlfriend. It was his way of coming out as crossdresser/sissy. It's just another part of life for us, like our diapers! He was embarrassed at first, but we've gone out as girlfriends twice now, and plan to do it again soon. Most girls in my experience find it sexy. So, embrace it and reap the benefits! Feel free to message me if you need help, or just someone to talk to about it.
 
There's nothing wrong with being a straight guy and not interested in men and liking sissy things. I am in the same boat. I like dressing up in panties, bras, skirts, short-shorts and so forth.

Just embrace it.
 
Me too likes sissy things and i say this: You are not alone. Just embrace it. :)
 
You can be straight and still like that stuff.

I love my sissy/LG side, and wearing girls things as well.
You are not alone in liking that stuff.

Not everyone will understand, but here at ADISC we do. :3
 
Dash,

Firstly, you need to know that I am transgender. I know quite a bit about all this as I have had to learn to survive.

Stop equating gender related stuff like a sissy fetish with sexuality. Psychologically, Gender and sexuality are unrelated. Also your sex is also unrelated:

Sex - Biological form of your body - Male / Female / Intersex
Gender - Gender is defined 'the relations between men and women, both perceptual and material. Gender is not determined biologically, as a result of sexual characteristics of either women or men, but is constructed socially. Gender is actually a spectrum and not binary as constructed socially in western cultures.
Sexuality - Who you are attracted to - Look up the work of Alfred Kinsey if you want to understand more about this.

To put this into perspective:

Sex - I am male as i have the organs of a male
Gender - I am Female - Most probably due to a hormonal imbalance in the first trimester of pregnancy. therefore., I am transgender and suffer from Gender Dysphoria due to the mismatch (In my case I am undergoing transition to sort this out)
Sexuality - I am predominantly attracted to those who are of the female sex (see above).

The Sissy fetish relates to Gender, not sex or sexuality.

in short, this is most probably hard wired and there is nothing that you can do to change it.

Am I saying you are transgender like me? No. I'm the extreme form but it is a spectrum. What we have in the Sissy fetish is threefold: A desire for something female (a transgender trait). A desire to be little - This tends to be due to upbringing. It is a desire for innocence among other things. Finally, many Sissy's wish to cede control to another and / or be humiliated. This is a Submissive trait in common with BDSM and is more related to sexuality.

Hope that helps unpack this just a little. PM me if you want to chat offline.

DLE
 
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SissyDLE said:
Sex - Biological form of your body - Male / Female / Intersex
Gender - Gender is defined 'the relations between men and women, both perceptual and material. Gender is not determined biologically, as a result of sexual characteristics of either women or men, but is constructed socially. Gender is actually a spectrum and not binary as constructed socially in western cultures.
Sexuality - Who you are attracted to - Look up the work of Alfred Kinsey if you want to understand more about this.


The Sissy fetish relates to Gender, not sex or sexuality.

in short, this is most probably hard wired and there is nothing that you can do to change it.

Am I saying you are transgender like me? No. I'm the extreme form but it is a spectrum. What we have in the Sissy fetish is threefold: A desire for something female (a transgender trait). A desire to be little - This tends to be due to upbringing. It is a desire for innocence among other things. Finally, many Sissy's wish to cede control to another and / or be humiliated. This is a Submissive trait in common with BDSM and is more related to sexuality.

This is a really nice way to describe this. I like it :3

I always hated the binary or only has to be 2 things you can be in regards to sex and gender.
I personally know it can be way more complicated than that.

For me my sissy side is maybe a small tad into that first part, and a bit more into the second.
I don't want to be controlled, tho nurtured/cared for is more how it is.
As its not a sexual thing for me.
I just find my way I am, and like things confusing sometimes.
 
I am also straight and I have no interests in men and I too like to wear all the stuff that you like to wear and acting girly and being treated like a little girl. I like to wear panties and bras all the time and I wear them frequently.
All I can say is accept it and act upon, dress up and wear pink/girly diapers and basically do what you want to do.
 
Just do whatever makes you happy. If that's dressing up then do it. Be who you are and don't feel like you have to hide. Like everyone else said, embrace it!!
 
It is also worth bearing in mind that it is now widely recognised that there are a lot of non-binary and gender fluid people out there. One friend describes themselves as a 'Demi-girl' but the extent of their girlyness waxes and wanes on a daily, even hourly basis. Mostly they dress androgynously but they always wear makeup and have been known to don a dress. They are now on feminising hormomes but will probably not have the operation (whereas I will as I am gender binary, just in the wrong body)

DLE
 
I don't see anything wrong with being transgender, I also have many transgender friends in my university life but I'm straight, if someone look you down just don't care about it, being your self and proud of who you are.

btw I like sissy too but it's not my main type sorry to say that :p
 
I'm transgender too! I never felt like one of the guys growing up, went in for a scan a few years ago because I wanted to know why I've always felt female and I found out I have partially formed female organs. Most folks confuse me for female over the phone, and to be honest it doesn't bother me. I love myself because I am just me!

As for the sissy fetish, I have experimented with panties and such since I was about 8 or so and I always felt at home with it. I do it once in a while now and anything pink my feminine side just roars. Embrace yourself for being you.. be happy and be proud! You're unique and among friends here!
 
Thanks folks - I'd like to hear from the OP though as to their thoughts on all this.

BTW, from a state of complete denial three months ago, I am now happy and proud to say that I am transgender and on the road to being fully female. It has been the hardest admission of my life but also the best. I am what I am - and proud of it!

DLE
 
Good for you! :) So proud of ya DLE!!
 
I know how you feel I am also very confused about myself sometimes. Gender and sexuality doesn't always fit into nice neat perfect little boxes. Just remember we are all human and every one is unique in there own way just be who you are try to love yourself for who you are.
 
Surgelover,

I was confused about myself for a very long time until I decided to stop worrying about it and just accept myself for who I am. That led me to start researching these different desires. That led me first to ADISC and shortly thereafter to the realisation that I am transgender. It has been a hard journey complete with severe depression that I am now largely out the other side of.

You are quite right, life does not fit into nice neat little boxes, trouble is, society tries to define the little boxes and stuff you into them. If you do not conform to their nice neat shape, you get threatened with being dumped in the reject box labelled 'freak'. So, most of us make the effort to squeeze ourselves into an uncomfortable and ill fitting box, smiling all the while and telling everyone else how comfortable it is.

In my case, I got chronic cramp from being jammed in the wrong box so I extricated my self from the box and am building a new one labelled 'ME'. It is a labour of love. It will take a lifetime BUT it will be comfortable, better than the standard issue identikit ones issued by society and it will be WAAAAYYY over there!

In short, I am now going to be me. If anyone does not like that, tough! I have a very female brain jammed in a male body - soon to be corrected.

DLE
 
Well said, DLE :) We shouldn't have to confine ourselves or be measured to the 'norm'. Most important thing to be is yourself and what your heart desires!
 
SissyDLE said:
Dash,

Firstly, you need to know that I am transgender. I know quite a bit about all this as I have had to learn to survive.

Stop equating gender related stuff like a sissy fetish with sexuality. Psychologically, Gender and sexuality are unrelated. Also your sex is also unrelated:

Sex - Biological form of your body - Male / Female / Intersex
Gender - Gender is defined 'the relations between men and women, both perceptual and material. Gender is not determined biologically, as a result of sexual characteristics of either women or men, but is constructed socially. Gender is actually a spectrum and not binary as constructed socially in western cultures.
Sexuality - Who you are attracted to - Look up the work of Alfred Kinsey if you want to understand more about this.

To put this into perspective:

Sex - I am male as i have the organs of a male
Gender - I am Female - Most probably due to a hormonal imbalance in the first trimester of pregnancy. therefore., I am transgender and suffer from Gender Dysphoria due to the mismatch (In my case I am undergoing transition to sort this out)
Sexuality - I am predominantly attracted to those who are of the female sex (see above).

The Sissy fetish relates to Gender, not sex or sexuality.

in short, this is most probably hard wired and there is nothing that you can do to change it.

Am I saying you are transgender like me? No. I'm the extreme form but it is a spectrum. What we have in the Sissy fetish is threefold: A desire for something female (a transgender trait). A desire to be little - This tends to be due to upbringing. It is a desire for innocence among other things. Finally, many Sissy's wish to cede control to another and / or be humiliated. This is a Submissive trait in common with BDSM and is more related to sexuality.

Hope that helps unpack this just a little. PM me if you want to chat offline.

DLE

I have to respectfully disagree with some of this.

To me Sissy is actually very much a sexuality thing in that sissy is a fetish. You might have some non-sexual enjoyment of it at times like many fetishes, but sissy implies some level of fetish interest to me. If you just enjoy girlish behaviors without any sexual aspects to it, to me you are a LG, not a Sissy.

Having actual gender questions is a whole different thing, and someone can have both.. but it's still different. It can be just a fetish, a kink, and not involved in how one expresses their gender the rest of the time. So in this case, I see the "sissy fetish" far more a aspect of one's sexuality and actually not apart of their gender.

I think the OP IS expressing some non-fetish desire for feminine things, which he should understand is totally fine. Don't get me wrong, I totally agree with the intention of your post, to explore with the OP the difference between gender and sex and how one relates to them and all that.

I just have trouble with the idea that the "sissy fetish is an aspect of one's gender". I just don't want to equate sissy as something it isn't. It's not like "transgender-lite". Being sissy does not necessitate any disconnect or confusion about one's gender at all. I would also imply that enjoying being an adult male who enjoys things normally only allowed to "little girls" is fine too, and that interest in these things does not make him any less "male" and certainly has nothing to do with his interest in men or women. Being feminine does not mean liking men just like being masculine does not mean liking women. I think this is what you were trying to point out, with your post.. but I think it ended up implying other things as well.

In some way, I even disagree with the way you described sex. I'm a female. I have a penis, but I'm female. This is how terms like "assigned male at birth" started rather then "male-to-female" which in my opinion is a bit of an outdated term. Because it implies that some point in my life I "was" male and I've just become a female. No. I've just always been a female with a penis.
 
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Gigglemuffinz,

You make a couple of interesting points.

Firstly - Girls can be Sissy's too in the way that they dress and behave. Now, we use the term rather differently here. Yes, for most, being a Sissy is a fetish however, remember that I look at this through my eyes, with my own experience. In my case, my love of all things Sissy came from a gender issue. Being a Sissy / LG / DL did give me some sexual pleasure but, I realised very quickly that there was more to this. In fact it was through exploring this that I finally made peace with the fact that I am transgender. I must add that I get no sexual pleasure from dressing and going out as an adult female, just a sense of peace from being who I am.

Now, the way I described sex was purely from the strict medical angle and is assigned purely on genitalia (male / female / intersex). the problem here is that at birth, it is not possible to open up the brain and see a mismatch. Thus we are assigned by the medical profession as 'male', expected by society to function and act 'male' but out gender is female. As such, we undergo a process of sex reassignment to align our sex with our gender. Bear in mind that medical science tried everything to align out gender to our sex in the past. So, my use of the terms was in a pure medical / psychological context.

I happen to agree with you as to how I perceive myself. I am female. I cannot escape however that, for the moment, I am pre-transition. As such I currently describe myself as Transgender. Once I get my passport changed which I will be able to do in October, I will then describe myself as female.

The problem with this is that terminology is moving very fast and in different directions in different countries. For instance, we used to use the term transsexual for someone who has transitioned and had the operations. This is not considered derogatory and people are merely referred to by the sex and gender that they present as. Now this has clear advantages for me. When I am out in female form, I am treated as female.

Hope that helps understand my perspective and I do understand your view,

DLE
 
DLE,

All I can say is thank you for such kind words
 
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