Coming Out As ABDL in College

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kik91

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Hi guys! So, as you might know, I'm very open with my family and friends about my ABDLness. But now I was thinking of doing something a little more drastic.

You see, I'm a film student, so I'm taking a third level Scriptwriting class where they all read your script and they give you feedback. I REALLY want to do an ABDL feature film. Yet, it will involve me standing in front of everybody an pitching my ideas. So... if they ask me where it came from... I was thinking of coming clean and telling them I am an ABDL. I know, it would mean telling an entire class about my diapers.

So, it's still 3 months away and I don't know what you guys think. Bravery and pride or social suicide?
 
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The thread title alone gave me shivers. I would say social suicide, there will likely be atleast one or two accepting people in the group however i personally don't think the stick and grief would be worth it. It's different telling close friends and family than a class full of (potentially) strangers.
 

BachBrahms

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I'd say social and possibly career suicide. In college I'd advise you to steer clear of anything that could possibly be misinterpreted, and while we have a clear understanding of what this is and isn't, it just takes one person who doesn't understand and the jig is up. People don't always hear what you tell them; they hear things based on their own life experiences, biases, and filters. You could find yourself labeled and branded all sorts of untrue and yucky things, and at that point any word of correction you have to offer won't matter for the train will have left the station. It is also simply impolite to expose your class to this. Most of them likely wouldn't want to know anyway. Imagine the tables were turned and someone else did a film about something funky they were into.

I hear where you're coming from. It would be great to be able to tell others and I dream of a day when what we do and need is accepted by the public. That day certainly hasn't come yet. Be careful. Don't let pride and hope of understanding ruin your future career.
 

kik91

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I'd say social and possibly career suicide. In college I'd advise you to steer clear of anything that could possibly be misinterpreted, and while we have a clear understanding of what this is and isn't, it just takes one person who doesn't understand and the jig is up. People don't always hear what you tell them; they hear things based on their own life experiences, biases, and filters. You could find yourself labeled and branded all sorts of untrue and yucky things, and at that point any word of correction you have to offer won't matter for the train will have left the station. It is also simply impolite to expose your class to this. Most of them likely wouldn't want to know anyway. Imagine the tables were turned and someone else did a film about something funky they were into.

I hear where you're coming from. It would be great to be able to tell others and I dream of a day when what we do and need is accepted by the public. That day certainly hasn't come yet. Be careful. Don't let pride and hope of understanding ruin your future career.

I see where you're coming. As filmmakers, one of the things we're programmed to do is to be open minded. In fact, in my Screenwriting Level 2 class, one classmate decided to write about a boy who never had sex so he starts seeing out sexual gratification in odd ways. We're kinda used to this mentality where we see the world in a different way, but I understand your concerns. Thanks for telling me to be careful :)
 

dogboy

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If your fellow screen writing students are coming up with strange and kinky ideas, I suppose you could suggest your idea without saying that you are AB/DL. After all, the internet is a big, wide place where you could say you saw people like this. Then you would get a very honest response from your fellow students, and I'd bet that it would be very negative toward adult babies, and that's something you would have to live with.
 

kik91

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If your fellow screen writing students are coming up with strange and kinky ideas, I suppose you could suggest your idea without saying that you are AB/DL. After all, the internet is a big, wide place where you could say you saw people like this. Then you would get a very honest response from your fellow students, and I'd bet that it would be very negative toward adult babies, and that's something you would have to live with.
Thanks guys, I guess I could do that. I just really want to write that script for my class :p
 

BabyDenise

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I think writing a screenplay for an ABDL film would be great and I think you should go for it.

However, I don't think you should mention that you are into ABDL.

What I would propose is something along the lines of: You were looking up ideas and thought that many films and shows are biased or very one-sided and you wanted to write something that was more balanced. You came up with several possibilities but chose ABDL as your topic. You would not have to mention anything about your involvement in ABDL.
 

kik91

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I think writing a screenplay for an ABDL film would be great and I think you should go for it.

However, I don't think you should mention that you are into ABDL.

What I would propose is something along the lines of: You were looking up ideas and thought that many films and shows are biased or very one-sided and you wanted to write something that was more balanced. You came up with several possibilities but chose ABDL as your topic. You would not have to mention anything about your involvement in ABDL.

Thanks, yes, I think that is what will end up happening. I just really want to write and film this movie. I already have a plot!
 

DiscreetlyPampered

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Maybe doing this while your still in college may be a bit risky. I mean, we all know how people "label" each other, I would love to see a film on ab/dl, like a real film to help others with this, and to help the real world understand we're not crazy. I remember fighting my ab/dl when I was younger, it took me years to accept myself, I would of given anything to of had a movie or book, anything to help. but like I said, Think about it long and hard, once you put it out there, there's no taking it back. and you have the rest of your adult life to do this. Best of luck :)
 

Kilometers

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I too went to film school, and this idea hounded me. What a spectacular opportunity to broadcast ABDL. I ended up never explicitly putting myself out there, but I found opportunities to squeeze in references. I think that's the best approach, like the allusions to homosexuality in Studio-era films. Taboos have fallen, and they're continuing to fall, and yes fetish is increasingly accepted, but I don't believe a full coming-out will help. It may even hurt your credibility in your peers eyes and distract from your message. Subtly infuse ABDL in your work, and bide your time.
 

Tyger

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I'm a lot like you kik91, most of my family and friends know about my AB/DL side, so I also know what it is like to be really open. I think in a college/university environment, you are going to be surrounded by people who are a little more open minded, just because they are in an environment that forces them to be, add that to the fact that you are a film major, and I personally would suspect that you would be accepted, or at least respected, by more than just 2 or 3, probably more like a majority. However, I still think it would be best to stand on the side of caution about this.

It is your professional life at stake, which means that you are going to have to work with people you may or may not get along with well. You are going to have to keep up bridges, that you could have otherwise burned if it was your personal life. In your personal life, you can just say, "eh, if they hate me for being AB/DL, then I don't want to be around them anyway." Meanwhile, if the only bigshot willing to fund your movie is extremely conservative, then you are going to have to kiss ass, and not let him know some of the more personal things about yourself.

I think the best thing you can do, if you are pretty set on making an AB/DL film, is to tell the crew that a friend of your's is AB/DL, and keep it as vague as that. There are other films that include AB/DL's in them, some featuring an AB, so it isn't unheard of to do this. I think it is perfectly fine to make a film on it, but you will have to be professional about it, which I think would mean, not making it too personal.
 

kik91

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I'm a lot like you kik91, most of my family and friends know about my AB/DL side, so I also know what it is like to be really open. I think in a college/university environment, you are going to be surrounded by people who are a little more open minded, just because they are in an environment that forces them to be, add that to the fact that you are a film major, and I personally would suspect that you would be accepted, or at least respected, by more than just 2 or 3, probably more like a majority. However, I still think it would be best to stand on the side of caution about this.

It is your professional life at stake, which means that you are going to have to work with people you may or may not get along with well. You are going to have to keep up bridges, that you could have otherwise burned if it was your personal life. In your personal life, you can just say, "eh, if they hate me for being AB/DL, then I don't want to be around them anyway." Meanwhile, if the only bigshot willing to fund your movie is extremely conservative, then you are going to have to kiss ass, and not let him know some of the more personal things about yourself.

I think the best thing you can do, if you are pretty set on making an AB/DL film, is to tell the crew that a friend of your's is AB/DL, and keep it as vague as that. There are other films that include AB/DL's in them, some featuring an AB, so it isn't unheard of to do this. I think it is perfectly fine to make a film on it, but you will have to be professional about it, which I think would mean, not making it too personal.

Thanks Tyger, I really will keep all your advices to heart. I'll tell them a friend is an ABDL, it will probably make things easier. Thanks all of you for your comments. I'm going to start a thread on the film...

Thanks for your advice!
 

BigKid25

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DO NOT TELL YOUR CLASS THAT YOU ARE AN ABDL! Honestly if you sit down and weigh out the pros and cons of this situation, you will find it's not worth it and not at all necessary. Your academic life doesn't NEED your personal life to come into play. It can in a round-about way, but don't use this assignment as a pedestal to talk about your own life. People will look at that as a selfish venture rather than a universal work of art. Focus on the art of the film so that people scrutinize the film itself and not your personal ideas and interests.

I would pitch the idea as maybe a film idea of two people struggling with discovering themselves in a society that would probably disapprove of their interests. The vagueness could be interpreted a lot of different ways and you can bring up the ABDL thing as something that hasn't been touched on by mainstream media and so you wanted to do something that is completely different and eye-opening. If somebody asks where you got the idea, I would say anything except personal experience. Maybe you saw a documentary pop up and you thought, "Wow, what sort of life must these people live where they have to hide a very strange part of themselves while living normal lives?" Maybe a friend of yours told you about it and you were fascinated by the subject. Maybe you stumbled upon something that mentioned the idea and you had a sudden flash of inspiration. Anything but your own personal experiences! You don't need people judging this film as some confirmation bias pedestal that talks about your own views without creating realistic and relatable characters that represent different aspects of society. Use each of your characters and your setting to have a sort of social critique that people can look at and really connect with.
 

MetalMann

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is it really necessary to have to go beyond friends and family to grab acceptance I know you're trying to make a film about us but is it really necessary to do it in college in front of your student body? Instead of doing something like this how about doing something about other bizarre fetishes. You can just do a film about taboo subjects. And you can also have this adult baby stuff the amongst the rest. There's no reason to come out to everyone unless that's your thing.
 

cjs6616

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I recommend try to tell friends that don't know already first and see how they gauge it. Thats what I'm in the process of doing now. I started with my kinky friends because I know they would be more open minded and then started working towards my less kinky ones. I will agree though that college is probably one of the best times to make a mass come out because it is one of the most open minded groups of people that you will probably ever be immersed in.
 

MaxiPad89

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I went to school for media, specifically broadcast production, although I work in a different field now, so I understand this group and this group's mentality just as good as, if not better than, anyone else.

This is an absolutely horrible idea and you should not do it, for a majority of the reasons already stated. Doesn't matter if people are open minded, there are certain things people are not going to be instantly accepting of and this is one of them.

But I guess you'll have to sleep in the bed you make if you go ahead and do it.
 

MattiKins

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Hi guys! So, as you might know, I'm very open with my family and friends about my ABDLness. But now I was thinking of doing something a little more drastic.

You see, I'm a film student, so I'm taking a third level Scriptwriting class where they all read your script and they give you feedback. I REALLY want to do an ABDL feature film. Yet, it will involve me standing in front of everybody an pitching my ideas. So... if they ask me where it came from... I was thinking of coming clean and telling them I am an ABDL. I know, it would mean telling an entire class about my diapers.

So, it's still 3 months away and I don't know what you guys think. Bravery and pride or social suicide?

I'm not necessarily against coming out but- with that being said, are you sure you want to use a script idea that's so close to home as a pitch for an assignment? I'm not a filmmaker but I am a musician, and I wouldn't want to entrust people who don't get ABDL with opinions on the subject. Even if you don't tell them that you are, you are risking people panning your idea because of the subject matter.
 
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OK, since nobody has suggested it, I'm curious why this couldn't be done, but not as a school project, but an individual one. I'd never suggest coming out, as others have already expressed, since there's no way to determine the long term consequences. That being said, there's no reason not to complete the project, as an independent, cloaking yourself in as much anonymity as necessary to protect your future.

Good luck!
 

MattiKins

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OK, since nobody has suggested it, I'm curious why this couldn't be done, but not as a school project, but an individual one.

I guess I was trying to hint at that too. Something so close to home shouldn't be put into the hands of others especially if they may not be understanding or supportive.

I'd never suggest coming out, as others have already expressed, since there's no way to determine the long term consequences.

I would say it depends on his circumstances. There's also different degrees of "coming out". Telling a group of classmates might not be my first choice but perhaps simply by being yourself to whatever degree that may be and not hiding or apologizing for it, anyone can do that. There's no way to determine the long-term consequences of anything.

That being said, there's no reason not to complete the project, as an independent, cloaking yourself in as much anonymity as necessary to protect your future.

Good luck!

I've often said that we have an innumerable amount of talent in our community, from writers to musicians to filmmakers and visual artists of all kinds. We see so many programs about ABDLs made by others who aren't. 15 Stone Babies examines us with all the compassion and humanity of a documentary about bonobos. And that's probably the kindest portrayal over the years, we can go down the list. Why can't we tell our own stories? Why do we wait for other people to peek in and exploit the few of us who are willing to put ourselves out there for shock value, or to treat us as a curiosity? We can make our own films, for ABDLs by ABDLs, and we don't have to shroud ourselves in anonymity to do so either.

We have an extremely vibrant and beautiful subculture with more stories than there are stars in the night sky. We may not have similar lives but we share a common bond. If you've never sat side by side with 100 other ageplayers, littles, ABDL's, middles, bigs, and felt that common bond, reverberating through you like the Lost Chord while our voices sing out or cheer... I know not everyone has felt that, but I have, and I can tell you that I never wold have if I didn't take a step out of the shroud. I'm not saying tell the world and parade down the street in a diaper, but we could be doing more in-person networking and pooling our talents to create the narratives that are far more relevant to us than what National Geographic could ever hope for.
 

SariaSmiles

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It would be a great way I think to establish speaking on the kink world about little's! That being said, you have to be extremely, EXTREMELY careful in what you say. No personal stories about yourself, no names of people you know from communities. It has to be very private. You can definitely speak on what age play and the ABDL world mean in the fetish community but be wary of how you include yourself.
 
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