being more open about being an ABDL

abdlcal2222

Est. Contributor
Messages
35
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
I feel like its detrimental to hold in my ABDL desires. As I get older, it is certainly not going away, if anything the feelings are growing stronger. I think it would improve my mental state if I was able to express myself more, and go to a nursery or find a mommy to talk to.

Has anyone else experienced this?
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jorelaxed, ESPF and medfet878

nsluna

Est. Contributor
Messages
35
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
  3. Little
  4. Incontinent
My illness made me wear diapers, and I tried many times to like it, but I was frustrated.
At times like that, you need to comfort yourself more and organize your thoughts slowly while taking care of yourself!
And one more thing to add, ABDL is not a bad thing, there have been cases where it has been shaken a little bit by the social gaze..
So you need time to think about yourself and think about yourself in a comfortable time !
Cheer up! No matter what you choose, It doesn't change that you're yourself!
 
  • Like
Reactions: ShyBoo81, abdlcal2222, medfet878 and 1 other person

abdlcal2222

Est. Contributor
Messages
35
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
Thank you! I understand that it is not a bad thing, and I am mostly comfortable with it. I just have to be discreet of course for the social implications. I like what you said about organizing my thoughts, that is a good point.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Jorelaxed

Nowididit

Est. Contributor
Messages
1,349
Role
  1. Diaper Lover
jbsd2222 said:
I feel like its detrimental to hold in my ABDL desires. As I get older, it is certainly not going away, if anything the feelings are growing stronger. I think it would improve my mental state if I was able to express myself more, and go to a nursery or find a mommy to talk to.

Has anyone else experienced this?
Read the top thread here.
Please don't express yourself in such a manner.
 

abdlcal2222

Est. Contributor
Messages
35
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
Nowididit said:
Read the top thread here.
Please don't express yourself in such a manner.
I am sorry. I read through the rules and I don’t see what I did wrong. Can you be more specific?
 

Tangela

ASD & Non native speaker
Est. Contributor
Messages
66
Role
  1. Other
The first time I've dealt with ABDL desires and practices, I swore to myself I would carry this secret to the grave. It was the simple solution to the problem "what others will think?". If no one knows, no one can have an opinion about it. But this has a small side effect: the more you hide and suppress, the more you confirm to yourself these practices are shameful and wrong. Because people usually hide things that are bad, not good. You are convincing yourself that, indeed, you shouldn't be doing any of that.

After some time, I couldn't hold it anymore. I needed someone to talk about it. I told a friend that don't live close to me, and it was a blessing. She was supportive from day one. Over the years, she tried to convince me that, no, it's not wrong, nor shameful, and I'm a perfectly acceptable human being that is a lot of different things, not only an ABDL. And I would love to believe that, but my brain, tainted by years of shameful conditioning, couldn't believe. Maybe it was just her. She was weird because she thought that I wasn't weird.

Guess what? I told another friend. This time, a guy, and one who I regularly see. The reaction: largely the same. He knows me for years and accepted this as naturally as if we were talking about the weather (his words).

My conclusion: if you want to be more open, go for it. Just remember to be smart and sensible about who you are going to open up with. And how. Choose carefully, although it's pretty easy to know the ones that never are going to accept. And if it's sexual to you, no need to enter in details. I would say "no need to enter in details" in general.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Jorelaxed, Kittyinpink, ESPF and 1 other person

abdlcal2222

Est. Contributor
Messages
35
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
Tangela said:
The first time I've dealt with ABDL desires and practices, I swore to myself I would carry this secret to the grave. It was the simple solution to the problem "what others will think?". If no one knows, no one can have an opinion about it. But this has a small side effect: the more you hide and suppress, the more you confirm to yourself these practices are shameful and wrong. Because people usually hide things that are bad, not good. You are convincing yourself that, indeed, you shouldn't be doing any of that.

After some time, I couldn't hold it anymore. I needed someone to talk about it. I told a friend that don't live close to me, and it was a blessing. She was supportive from day one. Over the years, she tried to convince me that, no, it's not wrong, nor shameful, and I'm a perfectly acceptable human being that is a lot of different things, not only an ABDL. And I would love to believe that, but my brain, tainted by years of shameful conditioning, couldn't believe. Maybe it was just her. She was weird because she thought that I wasn't weird.

Guess what? I told another friend. This time, a guy, and one who I regularly see. The reaction: largely the same. He knows me for years and accepted this as naturally as if we were talking about the weather (his words).

My conclusion: if you want to be more open, go for it. Just remember to be smart and sensible about who you are going to open up with. And how. Choose carefully, although it's pretty easy to know the ones that never are going to accept. And if it's sexual to you, no need to enter in details. I would say "no need to enter in details" in general.
Thanks this was great information!
 
  • Like
Reactions: Tangela, Jorelaxed and Kittyinpink

Souly

The Forum Lurker :3
Est. Contributor
Messages
47
Age
19
Role
  1. Diaper Lover
jbsd2222 said:
I feel like its detrimental to hold in my ABDL desires. As I get older, it is certainly not going away, if anything the feelings are growing stronger. I think it would improve my mental state if I was able to express myself more, and go to a nursery or find a mommy to talk to.

Has anyone else experienced this?

for the longest time I tired my best to hide my ABDL urges and only recently did I finally just cave in and accept it. I've been a lot more mentally healthy since then but I would like to say that anything can be bad if you have to much of it.

basically, its healthy to embrace it, but unsheathe to make it your life
 
  • Like
Reactions: Tangela, Jorelaxed and abdlcal2222

ESPF

Est. Contributor
Messages
5,359
Role
  1. Diaper Lover
  2. Incontinent
I personally, have long ago now, (12... Ish? Years) "given up" hiding this aspect of myself.
I am out to all 3 of my closest friends. As well as my 2 roommates, and my one roommate's boyfriend/feyoncé.
My supervisor at work knows... So I'm assuming most of my co-workers do too by now. (Although I can't say for certain.)
Also my GP, my endocrinologist, my insurance, and my therapist all know. (My therapist and I have spoken extensively about my decision to to become diaper dependent again.)
I'm also out on several websites here on the web... So I figure the "No Such Agency" knows as well.
Amazon and North Shore certainly know.
I don't hide this aspect of myself anymore... But at the same time, I don't flont it either. If I alow someone into my home. They know. If somebody figures it out, I don't try to lie, or deny it.
So far I can honestly say I've yet to experience a "negative" reaction. (Although my one brother may eventually be an issue.) In fact the way I see it? If someone does have an issue about it... It's there problem, not mine.

I'm breaking no law, hurting no-one, and am Happy.
obama-mic-drop.gif
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: perlFerret, Tangela, abdlcal2222 and 1 other person

Nowididit

Est. Contributor
Messages
1,349
Role
  1. Diaper Lover
jbsd2222 said:
I am sorry. I read through the rules and I don’t see what I did wrong. Can you be more specific?
No no no....you did nothing wrong. What I trying point you towards a thread about some idiot dressed in a diaper and onsie publicly exposing themselves on a playground.
I'm sorry if I wasn't more articulate in my post. I was trying to say, please don't expose yourself in a way that draws negative attention to yourself and the ABDL community.
Yeah I understand your frustration. Holding and hiding a secret like this is extremely stressful and being open about it sure helps ones mental state.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Tangela, Jorelaxed and abdlcal2222

Covered

Est. Contributor
Messages
250
Role
  1. Diaper Lover
I assume you mean being open with specific other people? Yes, if you trust them, then go for it.

But being generally out and proud? I have these thoughts:

One hundred years ago or more, revealing oneself to be gay would have attracted an equally greater or negative reaction to revealing yourself to be ABDL in modern times. But tolerance has progressed. The same with cross-dressing, it's never been safer or more accepted. Will social tolerance progress enough for us to be out and safe? I doubt it, because I think people will always falsely conflate it with paedophilia. It is simply unsafe to walk around in public dressed in full ABDL getup. You be attacked, verbally at the very least, but probably also physically.
 
  • Like
Reactions: abdlcal2222

Nowididit

Est. Contributor
Messages
1,349
Role
  1. Diaper Lover
Covered said:
I assume you mean being open with specific other people? Yes, if you trust them, then go for it.

But being generally out and proud? I have these thoughts:

One hundred years ago or more, revealing oneself to be gay would have attracted an equally greater or negative reaction to revealing yourself to be ABDL in modern times. But tolerance has progressed. The same with cross-dressing, it's never been safer or more accepted. Will social tolerance progress enough for us to be out and safe? I doubt it, because I think people will always falsely conflate it with paedophilia. It is simply unsafe to walk around in public dressed in full ABDL getup. You be attacked, verbally at the very least, but probably also physically.
I agree with being verbally attacked but physically attacked...meh! Ppl are way more concerned with filming and shaming instead of throwing punches and protecting. We've seen it time and again where someone is being attacked, sometimes violently and bystanders are just standing there recording it on their phones. The ones that kill me are the young men doing nothing but recording or are seen walking away and letting the assault continue instead of trying to stop it. Confrontation takes a back seat to upvotes, retweets and likes.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: abdlcal2222

abdlcal2222

Est. Contributor
Messages
35
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
Nowididit said:
No no no....you did nothing wrong. What I trying point you towards a thread about some idiot dressed in a diaper and onsie publicly exposing themselves on a playground.
I'm sorry if I wasn't more articulate in my post. I was trying to say, please don't expose yourself in a way that draws negative attention to yourself and the ABDL community.
Yeah I understand your frustration. Holding and hiding a secret like this is extremely stressful and being open about it sure helps ones mental state.
Understood and no worries! Thanks for the feedback
 

abdlcal2222

Est. Contributor
Messages
35
Role
  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
Covered said:
I assume you mean being open with specific other people? Yes, if you trust them, then go for it.

But being generally out and proud? I have these thoughts:

One hundred years ago or more, revealing oneself to be gay would have attracted an equally greater or negative reaction to revealing yourself to be ABDL in modern times. But tolerance has progressed. The same with cross-dressing, it's never been safer or more accepted. Will social tolerance progress enough for us to be out and safe? I doubt it, because I think people will always falsely conflate it with paedophilia. It is simply unsafe to walk around in public dressed in full ABDL getup. You be attacked, verbally at the very least, but probably also physically.
Yes I totally agree. I am not saying to be totally open, I would never do that. Mainly just asking if anyone has had positive effects from being open with a select group of people. And if anyone has noticed negative effects of keeping everyone bottled up.
 
Top