Hello and welcome
I've been on here a few years now and I've found this site is really great. As you're new to this as you have stated, and because I am in the mood to, I will try to share with you some of the things I wished I knew when I first started to ponder these kinds of sites. What I say is not gospel, just my own personal experiences but I've been on quite a few of these websites for around seven years and I would consider myself quite knowledgeable when it comes to the online world of ABDL.
Firstly you are definitely not the only one, as you have discovered! Yay! We come in all shapes and sizes - everybody from hard-as-nails-combat-hardened frontline war veterans, to MP's, lawyers, investment bankers, teachers, athletes, MMA fighters, nurses, musicians, scientists, hippies, students, trans-genders, gays, bi's, furries, disabled people, incontinents, bedwetters etc - basically every type of person imaginable. People have tried to analyse the reasons behind the who's, why's, what's etc and whilst there are significant numbers who fit common ABDL stereotypes, i.e. most "sissy boys" are feminine homosexuals, the results I've found are at very best supportive of a theory, but never conclusive.
One prevalent theory is that people who've lived difficult childhoods (a considerable amount of ABDL's claim to fit this description) tend to sway in this direction due to a lack of nurturing/ parental love & support, which could at very least seem plausible - even to a layman - but then you read about other ABDL's who have had particularly traumatic upbringings but are adamant that it's completely irrelevant/ unrelated to their ABDL side. Are they right? Are they unsure? Or are they just into this lifestyle, regardless of their background? Who knows? One thing is for sure though, there are far too many complex variables and examples of cross-contradictory evidence which makes it near-impossible to draw any conclusive data. Indeed, there are common trends (which you will begin to notice if you hang around) which appear to support certain theories but nothing has ever
truly been confirmed, well at least not in my experience anyway.
Sadly, there are an unknown number of ABDL's out there who will be too scared to even Google this subject because of the social stigma and fear of being caught. And I totally understand that. For example, although I love who I am and have no desire to change, if I was in a ficticious situation where I had to publicly announce to all my friends and family that either : a) I am a homosexual and I'm a "taker" or b) I have IC issues, both day & night, I am ABDL and I enjoy wearing nappies, then I personally would go for option a) because it would be much easier and less hassle, even though I hate lies and would prefer option b). Shame that isn't it? And also quite interesting as how relatively not so long ago, homosexuality was considered a disease which was sadly, often treated with electrotherapy. And as we know nowadays, LGBT sexualities are not only accepted but proudly celebrated!
I remember being a kid thinking I was the only one who could possibly have these feelings, which messed with my head quite a bit, but in my early mid 20's I finally got my own computer and began exploring this side of me. I remember first joining ABDL sites and feeling a bit like I was some sort of weirdo. Opening accounts, deleting them out of fear and later returning, self loathing/ acceptance etc. It can be a tough thing to accept because of the stigma. And once you think you're settled, you then get messaged by someone saying "Hi are you wet baby?" (this may happen as there are a lot of desperate guys in the ABDL world who really don't know how to talk to people), which might make you feel like you are part of some weirdo club, which you are definitely not! If you get a message which seems a bit odd and you would rather not answer it, then please try to put it out of your mind and remember that most of us are good, honest, intelligent people.
Unfortunately there are quite a few ABDL's with no people skills who do not know how to behave appropriately towards others which can be very off-putting. Many are so over excited once they find a place like this and end up sending inappropriate messages to the masses in the hope of a friendly reply. I think this is probably because they haven't taken the time to learn about the community and the way things go. Some are just a bit socially inept, to put it lightly - which is actually another popular, yet unproven ABDL theory. That doesn't mean you can't talk in graphic detail about what you like and what you get up to with somebody, but obviously that is to be strictly kept between consenting friends, within private messages and well away from the public forums.
I hope I haven't put you off by telling you all of this, I just wish somebody had gave me a more detailed heads-up when I first shown my face around here. It's just some of your words resonated with me and I felt like giving you a little head start and a few helpful tips as something tells me you might be here for a while. Anyway, this site is pretty good for keeping pests away and removing inappropriate threads. I've found the majority of people on here are intelligent, well educated and well-balanced mentally, which I really, really like. We might share what is widely considered a taboo fetish, but we are mostly smart, funny and friendly individuals. Unfortunately, the same can't be said for my Facebook feed (don't get me wrong, it ain't that bad!) but is that such a bad thing? Maybe not. The way I see it is: most people on here have had the intelligence and courage to identify and proactively explore an area of their personality which can be very difficult to understand. For someone to have the guts to admit to themselves and accept that they enjoy nappies/ diapers and whatever ABDL tendencies they have takes a well-rounded individual with courage and a very open mind. All great attributes in my book. And thats why I come back here.
It's taken me quite some time to finally accept who I am and the cards I was dealt in life, but thanks to sites like this I am now in a very happy place with this part of me. I hope you'll spend some time here getting to know the community and having fun. It's a great place.
Wow that was some essay haha! I hope it was of some use to you
