Almost caught messy - help?

[Stillalittleboy]

So, a bit of background - my partner and I have been together for 4.5 years, we technically live apart but only 0.5 miles away and I often stay at his.

He has known about my DL side for nearly 3 years and has become more and more accepting and engaging in the whole thing. We are both very kinky anyway, and we engage in lots of things that we both enjoy together. The DL thing was a slow burn and has had its ups and downs but he is very much on board now (to the point that last week, I got to put him in a diaper, wet it, and have some naughty fun afterwards).

The only thing I really don't think he would approve of is messing. I say that because we were having a very open conversation about kink a couple of years ago, where he was asking me what my fantasies are, what really turns me on, no limits, no judgment. I said that I would like to be forced to mess one day - for the humiliation, loss of control, etc. which is the only thing I've ever said that did not get a positive reaction. Not negative, but clearly not something he approves of.

So this morning. We spent the night together last night (with me in a wet diaper throughout). Got up this morning, I have work to do at home, he needed to go and run an errand in town, so we went our separate ways. I knew I needed to poop, and figured that once we had parted ways, I could do just that. Enjoy it for a little bit while I sit down and do some research on the task I have for today, get cleaned up in the shower, and get on with the day.

It's not something I do all the time by any means, but sometimes I am just in the mood. Often by the time I've 'done the deed', I'm not really in the mood anymore and just get cleaned up without having had any great enjoyment from it. I don't know why I do it, but it's kind of a part of my DL side - the fantasy is much better than the reality 90% of the time.

So, I get home and just let go. I sorted a few things around the house before sitting in my mess and doing my research. I should point out that I never really get unannounced guests, including my partner, so I can normally do this sort of thing in the privacy of my own home without much fear of being caught.

Then I heard the back door go. There's one internal door between where I am and the back door. At first I start to make a dash for my bedroom upstairs, before realising this is not going to help and is akin to backing myself into a corner. So I go to the door in my messy diaper and hold the handle closed.

Me: Hello?
Partner: Hey...
Me: Are you okay?
Partner: Yeah, I just came to say hello
Me: I... I wasn't expecting that... I'm sorry
Partner: Oh... right... okay...

He then left. I'm starting to think I have f****d up and potentially undone years of progress between us. I immediately got cleaned up and showered (the moment for enjoying my situation had well and truly passed). Took about 10 minutes. I sent a message when I got out of the shower - "I'm sorry. Can I come over?" - no response for 20 mins. So I called. He picked up and said he's only just seen my message. I apologised again, explained that I wasn't expecting him to turn up. His response was "clearly!". I said I love it when he drops by to say hello (I do, but it happens so very rarely that I generally work on the basis that it won't happen - that doesn't mean that I don't want it to happen). The rest of the conversation was okay, not great but it didn't seem like he was mad at me. We were just talking about the things that we need to do today.

I never explained what I was actually doing in private, and I don't want to. I don't know if he would guess or not. Part of me wants to lie, and give an alternative reason as to why I couldn't let him in, but I don't think I can. For one I don't like lying to anyone. And, I can't really think of anything else I could have been doing that I wouldn't have wanted him to see. My only reason for wanting to lie is to try and prevent the unravelling of the progress we have made on exploring my DL side together.

Thank you for reading. Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[loadedpamperman]

The only way I'd see saving this situation from spiraling out of control is to be flat out honest. I doubt it makes a difference whether ones' partner is male or female...once there's a crack in the trust armor, the relationship is going to fall apart. He already knows you like to wear & use diapers (wet) so to me it wouldn't be but a short hop-skip-jump to the conclusion that maybe you like to poop your pants, too. Otherwise i see this as potentially relationship destroying, personally, though this is just my opinion.

 

[Tenawearer]

I would agree with my predecessor, honesty is the best policy. Otherwise your partner start imagining worse things...

 

[Stillalittleboy]

Thank you for your input. I’m going over in a bit and if it comes up, I’ll do my best to explain honestly. I feel like it will come up at some point or another, if not today, it will probably be during an argument or something further down the line which I do not want to happen.

 

[RainbowConnection]

Yeah, I agree. Honesty is probably going to be the best course of action. How and when you decide to speak with him about it is up to you to figure out, of course, but I wouldn't delay it if the only thing holding you back is fear. It seems you two are very open to begin with, which is already very good. Just try not to make your kink sound like a bad thing, if possible.

The conversation will most likely transition into a discussion of your kink. He'll likely ask questions as you go. Just be completely honest without overindulging. And since you two are already very open, perhaps you might also explain how it could potentially add to your relationship, asking if he is interested in trying. I have heard of couples making similar discussions before. Of course, gauge his reactions as you go, but don't let fear stop you from potentially growing your relationship with him (even if it results in nothing other than greater trust and understanding for one another).

 

[texswim]

So, a bit of background - my partner and I have been together for 4.5 years, we technically live apart but only 0.5 miles away and I often stay at his.

He has known about my DL side for nearly 3 years and has become more and more accepting and engaging in the whole thing. We are both very kinky anyway, and we engage in lots of things that we both enjoy together. The DL thing was a slow burn and has had its ups and downs but he is very much on board now (to the point that last week, I got to put him in a diaper, wet it, and have some naughty fun afterwards).

The only thing I really don't think he would approve of is messing. I say that because we were having a very open conversation about kink a couple of years ago, where he was asking me what my fantasies are, what really turns me on, no limits, no judgment. I said that I would like to be forced to mess one day - for the humiliation, loss of control, etc. which is the only thing I've ever said that did not get a positive reaction. Not negative, but clearly not something he approves of.

So this morning. We spent the night together last night (with me in a wet diaper throughout). Got up this morning, I have work to do at home, he needed to go and run an errand in town, so we went our separate ways. I knew I needed to poop, and figured that once we had parted ways, I could do just that. Enjoy it for a little bit while I sit down and do some research on the task I have for today, get cleaned up in the shower, and get on with the day.

It's not something I do all the time by any means, but sometimes I am just in the mood. Often by the time I've 'done the deed', I'm not really in the mood anymore and just get cleaned up without having had any great enjoyment from it. I don't know why I do it, but it's kind of a part of my DL side - the fantasy is much better than the reality 90% of the time.

I agree with your statement "It's not something I do all the time by any means, but sometimes I am just in the mood. Often by the time I've 'done the deed', I'm not really in the mood anymore and just get cleaned up without having had any great enjoyment from it. I don't know why I do it, but it's kind of a part of my DL side - the fantasy is much better than the reality 90% of the time." Even though I wear a diaper 24/7, I use it for wetting and have only rarely used a diaper for messing. And when I have messed in my diaper, it's as you wrote, the thought is great but the act of messing and the clean up is not so great.