Advice

[DiaperedDaniel11]

Hello, I have recently started talking to this girl and we’ve got quite close to each other, I will be staying at hers this weekend and would like to introduce her to diapers, I was thinking of telling her I’m a bed wetter (which I’m not) and wetting during the night and seeing her reaction in the morning, or should I straight up tell her I enjoy wearing and ask for her opinion, is there any other way I can introduce her to this side of me.

 

[Bbyalice]

In my opinion i truly believe that you should try to hold to honesty as much as possible. Not only would trying to keep up a lie like that be exhausting it is also a big turn off if its found out. I recommend once you've gotten to the point that you're far enough into the relationship that you both start taking it serious that you take a time to sit down with her and explain your diaper interests gently about it being a fetish that you enjoy and that you thought it only fair to tell her. Just remember lies really do start snowballing and can make things worse, and i believe that if someone really cares then they will care about your interests too.
I hope this was of some help to you and i hope everything goes well.

 

[ORBaby]

Lying is a bad way to be starting a relationship. Wait until a good moment comes up in conversation to mention it. I first mentioned abdl to my now wife when we were chatting online and the comment was made "that we all have our little secrets", she then asked what mine was. So I told her I was an abdl.

 

[Rob110]

Agreed don't lie about needing diapers for a medical issue, once you do you will have to keep on lying and wearing every night for the rest of your life and real bed wetters pee juring day time naps in most cases. Just think how bad it will be when and if she finds out you lied she may make a comment to your mom out of concern and find out you never had a bedwetting issue.

Always be open and honest but keep your diaper desires to your self as you may decide she is worth giving up wearing diapers but if you feel you can never give up diapers then tell her now before you both get to close and a possible breakup will be harder but be prepared of others to find out you wear diapers if the conversation gos south and she walks out.

 

[BigKid25]

Great advice so far from the gang.

A great relationship should be built first off mutual comfort, openness, trust and humor. They should feel like your best friend, or at least a really good one. And for my best friends, diaper wearing hasn't had to come up at all.

Granted, having a sexual relationship does make things more complicated because now you're factoring this into your desired sexual fantasy. And I get that some people really feel that ABDL is an integral part of their normal life and not just a tiny fraction. I tend to assume that because I have a whole, healthy, happy adult life without diaper wearing that diapers become something to enhance it and are not required to sustain my life.

Relationships should mirror your relationship to yourself while also taking into account mirroring your partners feelings and self understanding as well. Don't only consider one side. Please, please, please show some empathy for your partner.

 

[Nam Repaid]

100% agree with the others, lies destroy relationships when the time is right trust her with this but don't expect her to go with it 24/7 and she might just have something you never thought of you might not like too much will have to accept too.

 

[JOCKMAN]

I agree with what has already been written by those above but I question the timing as maybe being too early in the relationship? If you are just starting to become intimate, IMO, walk with the challenges of that first step and hold off on any fetish until more trust & understanding on other issues is undertaken. I refer to "babysteps" (pun intended) to start off. At some future point you will both find a time to discuss more personal areas.

 

[Evahasgone2]

Once again I see that another person wishes to spill his guts to someone else. I love that you want to feel honest and share with your new friend. I am 55 years old and to be honest there are 3 people that know about my fetish of loving diapers. My gf now, my husband that passed and me. I started at age 13 wearing diapers because i loved the feeling of pooping my panties and I got off on it. I never even thought of telling my parents or friends. It is my secret to bare alone. If I had ever thought of telling my parents my biggest fear was them taking me to a shrink and labeling me as crazy. I would keep it to myself and not tell her anything. I know many are saying be honest and be truthful, but that did not work for me. I told my husband and he never once touched me in a diaper. My husband was way too vanilla to even fathom the thought of diapers for fun. Thus a lonely 30 year marraige. Now having a gf that is herself a diaper lover life seems good to me. Daniel you do what your heart feels sweetie and don't expect miracles. Good luck and happy diaper wearing.

 

[Fluffybottoms]

It's one thing to tell your girl you enjoy wearing diapers. Losing her trust is a whole different ball park. Don't make some shit up to continue the relationship while avoiding that conversation. There will come a piont where not telling her is a lie. After she has invested too much time for you not to have told her. Probably sometime within the first 6 months - 1yr, I waited 20 years, FYI that's to long. When you tell her be honest, but don't go into alot of detail. Follow her lead. It pay to read others experiences who have been down the same path, that also helps to build up your confidence. It's not fun. A bit of wiskey helps also. Just not to much if she's big enough to kick your but.

 

[diaperjack101]

Dan, like Eva says, think it hard if there may be a really special person in your life. I always kept myself alone about diapers. Yea, I've had very good friends and lovers over my life and have enjoyed them. And I do love my diapers. But mixing both is a separate thing. Good luck

 

[iwearattends]

I’d wait until you know you want to be with her for the long term. Otherwise you might spill the beans to someone who will mean nothing to you in the future. Not saying to not ever say anything but I’d wait till I knew I loved this person enough to expose all my cards.

 

[Ereid2k19]

Don't lie about bedwetting if you don't actually wet the bed. If it's your first time staying over, maybe leave the diapers at home and just enjoy her company. You don't want to ruin things between you guys, and she's more likely to accept it if you become even closer first.

 

[DippyDawg]

One sure way to spook a new GF is to tell her you love her too early in the relationship. Change "tell her you love her" to "I love to wear diapers" and the spooky factor triples.

 

[Piefox]

In a relationship I honestly wouldn't lie as it will eventually come back to bite. Honesty is key and if you want a relationship to work you should hold that paramount.

Knowledge about one another and trust are 2 of the most valuable parts of a relationship you do not want to jeopardize that with a lie.