Advice needed yet again

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Fireband

The musician of many genres
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Hey,
So I need some advice. On the outside and online I am a really nice guy. I'm respectful and will stick up for those in need. But, it wasn't always like that. In high school, when I hit a depression spike, I developed a dark side. I became a con man. Selling anything around the school from snacks, to cliff notes, to test scores, to even other people's secrets. And if that wasn't enough, I was also into underground fighting. I was a ruthless, unfair, and sneaky fighter who went undefeated for 2 years. I was also involved in school bribery, and planting evidence of my wrong doings on others. I almost got someone expelled, and I'm from what some people call a richy rich community. I know I did this because I was being bullied and I snapped (according to my therapist, who says I was not responsible for what I did), but I still feel that darkness in me waiting to strike, and with my mild multiple personality diagnoses two weeks ago i'm worried I might become the con man I once was. Should I hate myself as a reminder of what i've done? I don't know what to do. With my girlfriend now deceased, I have no one to love and show my happy side to. I want to stay good, but I can be so unpredictable. What should I do?
thanks
 

tiny

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Should I hate myself as a reminder of what i've done?
No. The important part is to recognise what you've done, to feel remorseful, and to figure out how to "do better" next time. So long as you're not continuing in any "bad behaviour", then all that really matters is who you are NOW striving to be.

Everyone has a past; some more colourful than others. But people change. Life is one long process of learning. No one is perfect. Some people go down the wrong path... And some turn back and save others from making the same mistakes they did... You have learnt valuable things on your journey through life (as we all have). Don't beat yourself up for who you are. Don't hide from your past; embrace it. Own it. And let it go. Forgive yourself. If you have scars, let them heal. :smile:
 

dogboy

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Many of us did either bad or terrible things when we were young. That's sort of what being young is all about. I've done things that I would love to go back in time and undo, but that of course, is impossible. We all have to learn how to forgive ourselves. I've prayed about mine and asked God for forgiveness. If we can't forgive ourselves and more importantly, others, how can we find redemption?

All of what you did is in the past. What's important now is what you do with each and every day you've been given. Try to make the most of them. If you feel guilty, then help those who need help. You'll find you'll immediately feel better about yourself.
 

Orange

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Many of us did either bad or terrible things when we were young. That's sort of what being young is all about. I've done things that I would love to go back in time and undo, but that of course, is impossible. We all have to learn how to forgive ourselves.
Lord knows lol.

@OP: Bruv shit happens, nothing you said was horrible. How much did you con from people lol? Did they not get the snacks/test answers they paid for?

You seem awful proud of it tho.
 
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