AB Caretakers without Littles

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Sanch

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For many ABs and Littles, we first discover our ABDL side by ourselves, and then possibly later get to share it with someone in a relationship. Being an AB/Little is quite easy (if sometimes slightly lonely) to do by yourself, but how do Caretakers manage?

If you've been a caretaker for an AB/Little, is there any way you can still do (and enjoy) those nurturing caretaker activities without having a little around? Would the caregiver maybe use a substitute like a doll or plushy, or 'play' with an imaginary Little?

Also, if you discover you like the idea of being an ABDL caretaker, how do you indulge and explore that interest if you don't have a Little to play that role with?

I'd be really interested to here any theories on this, especially from anyone who's been or identified as an AB Mommy/Daddy/Caregiver, yet not had a Little to look after or otherwise discipline.
 

Trevor

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At this stage of my life, I feel like if I never did caretaking again in general, I'd be fine with it. However, I have people I care about and that's part of our relationship and I value them and its place in the relationship immensely. So while I feel no sense of loss in not caretaking generally, I miss being with those I care about and engage in that way. I may see it differently in the future but that's where I am right now.
 

Sanch

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At this stage of my life, I feel like if I never did caretaking again in general, I'd be fine with it. However, I have people I care about and that's part of our relationship and I value them and its place in the relationship immensely. So while I feel no sense of loss in not caretaking generally, I miss being with those I care about and engage in that way. I may see it differently in the future but that's where I am right now.

That's really interesting, Trevor. Would you say that your choice to do caretaking had more to do with meeting particular people you cared about, than any prior desire to be a caretaker?
 

Trevor

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That's really interesting, Trevor. Would you say that your choice to do caretaking had more to do with meeting particular people you cared about, than any prior desire to be a caretaker?

Definitely. I had no interest in the caretaking dynamic from either side. I wasn't opposed to it but when I thought about it, it was only appealing as a curiosity. However, as I got more socialized with other ABDLs, I got to thinking more about what it actually entailed and reading threads on it with more interest. I got to see how the basics of it were pretty easy and that since there were people who I cared about that felt very strongly about it, it seemed almost rude not to offer. The tricky bit was that it didn't take long to see that it was a two-way street of enjoyment and a great way to show love and affection. I would miss being able to share that but I'm not seeking it as a thing in and of itself. It's currently a means for me, not an end. Again, this may change.
 

Sanch

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Definitely. I had no interest in the caretaking dynamic from either side. I wasn't opposed to it but when I thought about it, it was only appealing as a curiosity. However, as I got more socialized with other ABDLs, I got to thinking more about what it actually entailed and reading threads on it with more interest. I got to see how the basics of it were pretty easy and that since there were people who I cared about that felt very strongly about it, it seemed almost rude not to offer. The tricky bit was that it didn't take long to see that it was a two-way street of enjoyment and a great way to show love and affection. I would miss being able to share that but I'm not seeking it as a thing in and of itself. It's currently a means for me, not an end. Again, this may change.

It's interesting that you see it as a "two-way street of enjoyment", because they're almost exactly my girlfriend's words. Like you, I think she'd always had the capacity to enjoy being a caretaker, but hadn't ever had a conscious wish to 'Baby' someone until I introduced the idea to her.

In a different sense, I can identify as an AB to doing Little behaviours as "a means, not an end". I do babyish activities (and try to get into a little headspace) because I want to achieve a sense of comfort, protection, and when I'm doing it with my GF - a nurturing and bonding experience. I don't see the goal as being like a baby, I see acting and thinking like a baby to be my chosen route to unlocking a lot of emotions and feelings which I enjoy.
 

Trevor

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It's interesting that you see it as a "two-way street of enjoyment", because they're almost exactly my girlfriend's words. Like you, I think she'd always had the capacity to enjoy being a caretaker, but hadn't ever had a conscious wish to 'Baby' someone until I introduced the idea to her.

In a different sense, I can identify as an AB to doing Little behaviours as "a means, not an end". I do babyish activities (and try to get into a little headspace) because I want to achieve a sense of comfort, protection, and when I'm doing it with my GF - a nurturing and bonding experience. I don't see the goal as being like a baby, I see acting and thinking like a baby to be my chosen route to unlocking a lot of emotions and feelings which I enjoy.

That makes sense to me. I find that it's the intimate relationship that feels the most natural or comfortable for me thus far. To start with, I was resistant to the caregiver label because it was something that I did for my dear friend and and not something that I sought as an activity. Over time, I've wound up engaging with others with varying degrees of intimacy and it's been very positive for me overall. Despite that, I have trouble conceiving of it as something to seek after; it's a product of those relationships and the relationships come first.
 

SpicySpoon

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Hope I'm not too late to add.

I identify as a caretaker/Daddy. And I feel I have a unique insight to this very problem.

I'd say once every six months I get an opportunity to be a part-time caregiver for a week to my wife.

The off times? There isn't anything one can do. You just sit and feel unneeded. There are some online friends that I talk to about it all but it only seems to make me either cognizant of how little I am needed in my own life or makes me jealous of what they have that I don't.
 

Penny

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Have you tried findin someone to RP with online or through text or Skype? I'm sure there are plenty of babies who might be interested in that.
 
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I really enjoy the dominating feeling I get when I care for a baby. The power to control them, and make them do as they are told. Not in a nasty way however, I still care, I just enjoy the power side of it. A baby has to give over control completely, they have no say in what happens next or what their day will bring.
 

Wazzle

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This is an interesting topic; I'm glad you brought it up. There seems to be a lot of reasons someone would want or be capable of caretaking. I myself have been a DL since a young age. Once I learned more about the community and what an AB was it just kind of seemed like a logical step to me to try caretaking. The aspect of being needed and caring for someone in that way allured me the more mature I became. The sexual side of it is fairly exciting but I like the non-sexual side of it as well.

When I am in a relationship I enjoy when my partner act childish and get a lot of satisfaction taking care of them. I've never been in a relationship with an AB though. Outside of a relationship I crave that kind of dynamic. I actively seek it when I have time but I cope by just concentrating on my DL side or work. When girls do the baby voice I just melt and go straight into caretaker mode. I feel like a lot of people have the capability to be caretakers if the scenario arises. Vice versa I feel like a lot of people would enjoy being babied if they allow themselves. From experience I have had one or two girlfriends indulge me and let me diaper them and take care of them to whatever extent they feel comfortable. In a perfect world I'd find a girl who likes diapers, to be babied sometimes and likes it if I wore on occasion. One day...
 

Sanch

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Thank you all for some really interesting responses! I agree with Wazzle that a lot of people have the capacity to enjoy the Caretaker and AB roles, and there's a lot of couples who 'baby talk' with each other who aren't, or at the very least aren't yet interested in ABDL.
 
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