A Christmas Miracle: Acceptance from Dad and my history with diapers

[ZetaSonic]

Today, I told my father that I was a *BDL, in spite of him being aware of my experimentations in college. He was completely okay with it.

I went over how I used to think that being into diapers was an immoral thing because of what, well, let's just say he was an acquaintance, claimed about wearing diapers neither a baby nor an old person: that it makes you want to fondle children. I fought to dislodge *BDL from my psyche for two years because of this myth. He even used my mother as a weapon, accusing me of trying to turn her into the laughingstock of the county and implying that what I was doing even went against my religious beliefs.

I eventually overcame my self-loathing and the acquaintance parted ways with us. He didn't know what he was talking about, it turns out. All allegations of *BDLism creating child predators were bullcrap, there was nothing illegal about wearing diapers, and -- to top it all off -- no Biblical basis that it was immoral.

Dad wasn't angry and he didn't think any less of me.


Mom, on the other hand, has proven to be more apprehensive about me and diapers. It was during adolescence when my *BDL side broke ground. I flipped through her old magazines in private solely to look at vintage ads for stuff like Pampers, Luvs, Huggies, and Pull-Ups. It was never about the babies, but the products: all pitching absorbency and leakage protection.

She was the first ever to learn about my interest in diapers. I was 17 at the time and was smuggling Pull-Ups (I could JUST fit in them) and Goodnites into the house. I was paranoid about someone discovering that I had them. Eventually, she found them. We talked about it and this was where I first heard of the pedo myth. Thinking it was wrong, I swore off diapers... it lasted a year before I tried an adult line for the first time. I got caught by the acquaintance on my second day with them and went to therapy.

It worked to some extent. My obsession waned gradually -- it never went completely away, but I could control myself. I was only wearing every-so-often, but there were two times Mom caught me. She wasn't happy either time, as one would expect, and I can understand her fears about having shame of some sort being brought upon us... but the thing is, I don't want her (or anyone else) to be dragged into my "diaper side".

I fear even talking to her about it. She can get ornery at times and has actually said "You're sick" to my face when I was busted once when I had diapers.

I can't get my own place due to the fact that she's incredibly weak and I have to serve as her muscle during hard tasks. Even though her heart's in the right place, I wish there was a way to convince her that I'm no mental case because of this. Dad doesn't think that, but Mom has a lot of her father in her.

 

[Argent]

Hey ZS big hug for your win with your dad and a bigger hug for your ongoing acceptance with your mum.

I feel sorry for the misguided aquatance but sorrier for you going through that prejudice nonsensical garbage.

Sadly I doubt you can convince everybody but you should know you have peeps here that support and accept you.

 

[Kalis]

50% is better than a lot of us get, congratulations!! The really nice thing is that there is a possibility that your dad can help bring her around to tolerance, or possibly acceptance. Keep your head up, and remember that people love you.

 

[BabyJedi]

Congratulations!

 

[Slomo]

At this point you're just going to have to put your foot down with your mom. Tell her you are an adult, and she no longer had any say in what kind of "underwear" you choose. She is completely wrong in her misguided belief of abdl, but that doesn't matter. She doesn't have to understand it, only accept it and move on.

 

[JOCKMAN]

I was very fortunate to have parents that never made a big deal about my wearing protective undergarments. Up until age 8 - 9 I had to wear protection due to off/ on bed wetting. My plastic mattress cover did not come off my bed until I was age 11. At 12 or 13 I bought my own plastic underpants due to wet dreams (I thought I was still almost wetting the bed) and I am fairly sure my mom knew I had them since she changed my sheets once with my plastic underpants underneath the first mattress so when she lifted it she must have seen them.

Since she never said anything I decided to then put them beneath my regular underwear in my pajama drawer with only a light degree of hiding them beneath some underwear. My thought was if she asked, I would tell her why I bought them and I expected she would say OK. Several times after my mom had finished washing / drying my clothes, I noticed my underwear had been re-arranged in my drawer and my plastic underpants were moved with them. She still never mentioned it and this went along with me growing up that it was not a big deal then either.

By 14 I no longer wore plastic underpants over my underwear and was fine until I went to college and had to buy snap on diapers and plastic underpants. Coming home for Christmas I was able to keep it all hidden and did my own wash when my parents were out working but my first summer I had left my plastic underpants on my bed one morning while changing into my jeans and shirt and my dad knocked on my door and I opened it without thinking about my plastic underpants on my bed. He made a weird face when he came in but only asked me what he wanted to ask and left. I did not understand his weird expression until I turned around and saw I had left my plastic underpants on the bed. Once again, they never said anything and talking with my parents over the years I can safely assume they thought if I needed to wear protective undergarments than that was fine with them and if I ever wanted to talk about it I could have brought it up. I had even put a full zip-on mattress cover on my bed the first summer back home so when I washed my sheets it was there to notice most of the day there were no sheets on the bed. My mom did ask me a few weeks before I came home for the summer if the college mattresses had water proof covers on them and I told her with no degree of hesitation, yes. I wanted to tell her I was glad there were protective covers on the mattresses but then thought it would be opening up a conversation about my pervious bedwetting and possibly they may have noticed something when I was home at Christmas, so I let the topic drop.