I work toward an end goal. I get close to the end. Than I get this voice in my head "Is this what you really want?" or "What happens if you get what you want and it ended badly?" My emotions always go crazy after a certain point. A more reason thought came about when I thought about socializing in a possible new city. It was honestly a scary idea. I can see myself going crazy with loneliness. SO after an idea like that comes around I instantly stop any progress toward leaving and have to start over all over again. I've tried meds to help and tried locating a therapist, but none are around.