So few Females

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dogboy

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#2
I think there was a very unofficial study done and male AB/DLs make up 75% of our population with females at 25%. It's just how it works as if it's in the AB/DL contract. I'm sure no one really knows why.
 
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#3
There is also a real question as to whether males are more likely to participate in identifying themselves in such studies and communities than females. This is a function of culture and society. So, this poses another question, are there really more males than females who are ABDL, or is it more gender neutral but females are simply less likely to acknowledge this or participate in ABDL forums and communities? It is a tough question to resolve.

But, regardless of whether this is the case or no, the fact remains that there are quite a few less women who participate in the ABDL communities than men.
 

Fascinating

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#5
That makes no sense and I don't believe it. I think women just feel more natural and comfortable with themselves and don't feel the need to join the support community.

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dogboy

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#6
Also, a lot of women don't like getting sexually hit on my male creepers, often found on diaper sites, sadly.
 

Poofybutt

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#7
That makes no sense and I don't believe it. I think women just feel more natural and comfortable with themselves and don't feel the need to join the support community.

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Interesting, you may be right on the personal comfortability front, but I have experienced and found that it's a little opposite, that women are usually a lot more sheepish, avoidant and tightlipped when it comes to sexual kinks, fetishes and behaviours outside of the norm whereas men are much more inclined towards openly embracing and being declarative of their sexual desires, fantasies and kinks.

From my personal experience, most of the women that I have known and have dated were far more private when it came to kinks than men, far more vanilla too. Many of my previous girlfriends were also incredibly shy about their past sexual encounters and experiences despite the fact that many of them had sex more times than I could count, they were so secretive and almost embarrassed. In my relationships, I always instigated the fetish and fantasy talk, my girlfriends never divulged their respective kinks to me until after I told them about my own idiosyncrasies and quirks.

I agree with you though, I've always thought that there were much more women in the community than studies tend to show. I only have like 3 in person ABDL friends, 2 of them are male 1 is female, pretty even. A quick search of sites like Fetlife yields quite a lot of female ABDL's, switches and caregivers as well.

It would be interesting to see what would be brought to light if new studies were taken, but then again surveys are somewhat pointless, they can never take into account the full number of people they are intending to statistically represent and gain data on and there are some people who, male or female and while interested, will never come out of the nursery, so to speak. Some people will also never even join an online group for this sort of thing and explore it in anonymity, I'd assume that there are still a lot of people with ABDL interests that will likely explore this side of themselves in complete secrecy/privacy, people like his will never factor into any survey/study.

With the advent of tumblr, reddit and other forms of social media and networking, I've noticed a surge of a lot of vocal and diverse females within the community coming out, there is definitely an upswing in the presence of female ABDL's and DDLG's. If a new survey was done, the ratio would still be male dominated, I think, but it certainly wouldn't be as skewed as 75 to 25, I'm thinking it would probably be along the lines of 60/40 or something like that.

Also, a lot of women don't like getting sexually hit on my male creepers, often found on diaper sites, sadly.
That could be another reason why, some guys just don't know how to take a hint. I think many of them are desperate and looking for connections in a very wrong way while others are just possessive and pushy creeps.

One of the reasons why I don't frequent Fetlife anymore is because a pushy guy in my local area wanted me to be his 24/7 Baby Boy, he wanted this despite the fact that I said on my account that I was looking for friends, switches or a Mommy, 24/7 wasn't even on my list of interests/fetishes. I also pleasantly declined his offers with the usual, "I'm not ready for something like that"," I like being an adult too" and "I'm just looking for friends" and he still couldn't take a hint. I am a guy and I experienced this problem, I gotta imagine it's much more frequent and maybe even a little worse for the girls.

While pushy guys unfortunately exist, it shouldn't frighten off and hasn't frightened off all female AB's as evidenced by the upswing of female AB's/DDLG's I've been noticing within the community. Guys like that also give good, honest, respectful and friendly Baby Boys and Daddy's a bad name.
 

AddyShadows

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#8
Honestly I'd say there are probably an equal amount of male to female but I doubt the majority of females need to go onto support sites like this or other things like that or hesitate to because of the overwhelming male population online. Plus I would imagine its very easy for female ab/dls to find someone accepting more so than it is for males thus probably reducing the amount of women who go onto forums and online.
 

Poofybutt

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#9
Honestly I'd say there are probably an equal amount of male to female but I doubt the majority of females need to go onto support sites like this or other things like that or hesitate to because of the overwhelming male population online. Plus I would imagine its very easy for female ab/dls to find someone accepting more so than it is for males thus probably reducing the amount of women who go onto forums and online.
Good points. I didn't even think that women might be intimidated to join a community that was predominantly men, but that makes sense, I mean, even I've dealt with some pushy males in the scene.

Is it really easier for women to find willing partners? I always thought that finding a partner as an ABDL would be difficult regardless of gender and sexual orientation, after all, being a big baby is admittedly, a tough sell.
 
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LittleSissieJolie

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#11
Women are more empowered now, in the '60s women were expected to be Wilma Flintstone or Lucy Ricardo or Laura Petry, That was the Madison Avenue profile and they by golly made it stick. Women wearing pants was more taboo than men wearing panties. Seriously.
One of the most "enlightened" ad campaigns, which allowed for women models wearing slacks, was a cigarette brand. The slogan was "you've come a long way, baby!" which was a mix of progress and regressive.
The term Baby is something of an insult even today when the person is obviously larger than a 'baby' and "infantile" is still a put-down. Also, most women are smaller than most men and a really ugly truth is that some men, maybe not the majority but way too many, think it's ok to hit people who are smaller than them. So women are less likely to put themselves into the influence of a large violent man. They evolved a lot more introverted in just about every aspect.

But still society condones calling a woman all manner of nasty names if she has more than one relationship. And glorifies a male individual (unless he's gay) who has many partners.
 
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#12
Males appear to be naturally more inclined than females to objectify sex (breasts, butts, hair etc.) and, in much the same way, to be more materialistic in fulfilling fantasies, sexual or nonsexual. I blame evolution.
 

rsabdl

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#13
i think there are more woman abdls out there then what we know of... alot just seem to be hesitant on joining communities cause the male to female ration they feel they will just get bombarded with a bunch guys
 

AddyShadows

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#14
Good points. I didn't even think that women might be intimidated to join a community that was predominantly men, but that makes sense, I mean, even I've dealt with some pushy males in the scene.

Is it really easier for women to find willing partners? I always thought that finding a partner as an ABDL would be difficult regardless of gender and sexual orientation, after all, being a big baby is admittedly, a tough sell.
I'm pretty sure if a chick messaged any guys who are on the ab/dl spectrum if they wanted to engage into an ab/dl relationship with them do you really think many guys would say no considering how hard it is to find a woman who's into it? I mean sure there are exceptions, there are many women here I would think that struggle but for the most part I'd say it's probably easier for a woman to find a guy than it is for a guy to find a woman because men advertise their singleness and women do not. (Generally anyway) At least from what I can observe. I mean look at the ratio of men to women on Adisc, the ratio is probably like 1 woman for every 5 guys. *Shrug* Maybe I just read into it wrong though idk.
 

alwayz

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#15
I agree, many women (like myself) feel comfortable with ourselves and our choices are very personal and look for others to share feelings and experiences but rarely look for support.
 

willnotwill

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#16
I think you're seeing two things. One, there indeed be fewer baby girls out there. Two, you see fewer baby girls who want to come hang up in forums such as these. I can tell you from experience I've had a few female friends who pretty much get tired of being harrassed by others in these kind of forums. It wasn't this board (in fact, the site doesn't exist anymore), but even the moderator hit on my ex-girlfriend at one point.
 

LittleAndrea

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#17
Ok, so I am biologically female and I don't know if my opinion helps at all but I can tell you that it is much easier for girls to let out that side of themselves and be accepted without the need of a support group online. I lurked for quite a while before I joined just to make sure that this wasn't just a weird fetish/dating site. I wanted a place to go where I didn't feel like I was alone. I have been accepted by my husband with open arms but sometimes even though you are accepted you don't want to feel like your the only one that feels the way you do.
A lot of my female friends have tendencies but we feel ok to indulge without anyone thinking it's weird. Having a girl driving around with a teddy bear in her car is nothing. You see a guy like that and you might start thinking what is that guy up to. Unfair I know, but societies paranoia is there and we can't stop it.
 

LittleSissieJolie

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#18
Ok, so I am biologically female and I don't know if my opinion helps at all but I can tell you that it is much easier for girls to let out that side of themselves and be accepted without the need of a support group online. I lurked for quite a while before I joined just to make sure that this wasn't just a weird fetish/dating site. I wanted a place to go where I didn't feel like I was alone. I have been accepted by my husband with open arms but sometimes even though you are accepted you don't want to feel like your the only one that feels the way you do.
A lot of my female friends have tendencies but we feel ok to indulge without anyone thinking it's weird. Having a girl driving around with a teddy bear in her car is nothing. You see a guy like that and you might start thinking what is that guy up to. Unfair I know, but societies paranoia is there and we can't stop it.
Seems reasonable to me. Way kewl and welcome. Speaking from nearly 6 decades of being bio-male, I'll expand that to bring up that a lot of what's considered Man Cave stuff is trying to impress other guys. Thoughts on lifestyle are pushed away. Sex talk among guys is mostly lying about one's prowess and number of 'conquests' and doesn't seem to wander far from 6th grade to one's 6th decade.

And a lot of the discussion from outside the baby community is still dominated by it being a strictly sexual thing. Going about speaking of things spiritual, or gentle or soft in any way is to guys a method of getting a lot of useless insults and attempted bullying.
 
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#19
I think it's safe to say that we're all on a journey of self discovery. I accepted a long time ago that this lifestyle is a solitary thing. I've never shared it with a partner and i'm not sure if i ever will. So, really, it doesn't matter to me that there is an apparent under representation of females with the same sexual drives. What I would really like to know is how and why i have these drives. Is it a genetic predisposition? Does it stem from an event in my childhood/babyhood? And why does it persist? Self acceptance is surely the key, I may never find out answers to my questions. But, as no-one gets hurt and it's not illegal, i'm comfortable in myself. I very much doubt a lot of people would understand anyway.
 

OmiOMy

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#20
I lurked for months before I made an account because everywhere else this came up, it was like... Off-puttingly sexual, and I'm not about that. The last thing I needed was some creepy dudes hitting me up from every direction for pics a dates when all I wanted was to figure me out.

That figure probably doesn't take into account the people who don't disclose for this reason (I mean, surveys like that are self-reported after all).
 
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