A Sad Goodbye although for the best.

Its been sometime since i have posted on here.

I just wanted to say good bye. My wife and I have been trying to work out a way to both be happy with me wearing and using my nappies. We have tried everything but she just cannot get over it.
So i have made a decision. I have discussed it with her. This decision is because my wife is more important to me than my nappies. My love for her is so much more than my nappies.
After this week i am giving up on my nappies. I know it going to be the hardest thing i will ever do but i know my wife will support me.
It turns out that i rely on my nappies because i need the comfort and security of them. The reason for this is that i havent been getting it from my wife. So after a very, very long conversation with my wife i have made her realise this.

Why i say after this week. Well my wife is away for the week and i just bought new packs of nappies. I want to use them rather than throw them away. What ever is left by the time my wife is back, i will be getting rid of the rest.

As i have said there is nothing more important to me than my relationship with my wife. If i want to save my relationship with her i need to do this. Its not her fault that she cannot get over it. To be honest this is a weird kink.
It would have been nice to have her be more accepting and to participate but life is what life is and there are sacrifices that need to be taken.

So its good bye and all the best to you all.

All the best buddy and I wish a happy life for you and your wife.

Are you sure you can do it though?

Kinda hard to do away with a big part of yourself.

It always worries me a little to see someone give up on something that they consider an important part of their life because someone else is unwilling to compromise. Inability to compromise undermines long-term stability in a relationship. (what you are doing is not compromise, it is surrender) But all the same, I wish you the best of luck!

Good luck. My wife is the same way in that she wants nothing to do with my wearing. Our compromise is that I can only wear in private. Never around her. While not ideal, it is still a compromise. I have tried to give them up a few times in my life and have been unsuccessful each time. The longest i went without diapers was two years right after getting married. I hadn't told my wife about it at that time, but I seriously thought I could give them up for good. The desire to wear became too strong and I got back into it.

Anyways, good luck in your venture. I really wish you all the best.

Best of luck and stay strong. If your put your mind to it you can do anything.

Ya, to be perfectly honest, I would never fold on something like this. That would be like having to stop playing video games because the person you are with doesn't want you to play. No offense, but no matter how much I love the person, they don't own me, they don't control my life. It's a relationship, and there has to be some sort of agreement and compromise. That is what marriage is.

Trying to give up, in my opinion, only makes matters worse. The promise to stop. What do you do when you can't after you promised or told her you would? Wouldn't that just make her even more frustrated because now now only are you doing something she doesn't like, but you are also doing it in secret behind her back and on top you lied to her. It becomes a situation where you become at fault too, and not just her.

After having made so many promises in the past to my mom that I would stop and not being able to, I now never will make any such promise. I say it straight up now, I will not make any promises I cannot keep.

Your best bet would be to talk to her again and mention this. Is she willing to understand that, you might not be able to just stop? Tell her, you love her, but also tell her if she wants you to stop it may just make things worse. Not only that, but it very well could fracture your relationship in the end. Maybe if you can, send her here. Ask her to talk to others to get a better understanding of the situation. To get advice. Etc. She is your wife, you cannot be the only one to make compromises. It doesn't matter if you love her more than diapers. Your love for her should have absolutly nothing to do with your interest in diapers.

Firstly, let me say "Good luck to you" and I wish you and your wife all the best!
Secondly, THIS is the main reason I have yet to get myself too involved with someone. I'm always too afraid they wouldn't be able to handle it and I'm not willing to give it up. It's been a part of me since I was three. It's as much a part of me as anything else. Giving it up would be like killing a part of myself. I wouldn't be able to do it but I wish you all the best and good luck!

Yeah, you're going to need luck. Trying to not like diapers is a lot like trying to not be gay or transgendered. And we know how well that works.

But hey, if you do manage to avoid a huge purge cycle by binging later on, stop by and let us know. In 20+ years I literally have not once heard of a single person who managed to change the core of how they think. You'd be the first for sure.

Two things.
First I applaud you. You're a brave and great husband. Yes, marriage might call for comprises but sometimes even for surrender. That is if you want to call it that. You must really love your wife.
Secondly, it will be hard. There will be easy times and there will be really hard times. There is a reason why we don't hear about anyone who managed to quit for good. They wouldn't tell us. They have cut all connection to the scene and why should they come to a forum like this ever again. Plus there is a huge variety in our fetishism spectrum. For some it's just a little thing like a hobby. For others it's a big part of their sexuality.
Notwithstanding what I said above I still think you can do it. Only the best of luck for your journey with your wife. May your love never end.

That sounds like an extremely difficult situation. I wish you luck. You'll definitely need it. I don't think I'd be able to do it, if I were in your situation. It's really not fair to you.

I could not have a serious relationship with someone who's against it. I think I'd find it really hard to even begin a relationship with someone who doesn't already know. It'd have to be someone I already know is very open minded.

Do what you have to to be happy. You do know these feelings don't just go away though, maybe in time it will get easier, I never got far enough away myself when I tried.

I cannot help but believe that you will end up resenting her, but remember that this is your decision. Best of luck to you.

Kenn said:

I cannot help but believe that you will end up resenting her, but remember that this is your decision. Best of luck to you.

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This. But that's just my gut feeling. I know you have fully talked out the ways to work around it and it's failed but have you had an 100% open discussion about WHAT she hates about nappies SO much? I fear this aspect of you might just crop up in another way that isn't nappies but similar and she might reject you for that... sorry if I sound like a negative Nelly.

But this is coming from someone who can't really understand being so unaccepting of their partner's kink so long as it isn't illegal and isn't hurting anyone.

I kinda sorta went through this myself with a girlfriend. Although she tolerated my diaper wearing (bare minimum at best) she def had an issue with anything remotely AB.
I bottled it up and kept it to myself, slowly I became sour and started nit picking everything she was doing, the anchor was that since I couldn't really express myself I kinda shut the gates of communication down and ended up resenting her. I was as wrong as her in this but for a different reason entirely. I still like the girl today but evidently we are not compatible due to my fetish or life style choice.
I'm not at all saying give up on your marriage or incorporate diapers into your relationship, what I'm saying is be very aware that for better or worse you need to keep the lines of communication open with each other, if something starts bugging you say it immediately before it becomes a he said / she said thing, or a since I cant have my diapers, you cant have or do this because it drives me nuts.

I think that if you have to give up something as important in your life as diapers, your wife should have to give up something, like about $70,000. when you buy a 700 hp new Camero. That seems only fair to me.

what about these things: To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part. ?

ArchtopK said:

what about these things: To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part. ?

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Yes, sometimes life does work that way. A person makes a choice as to what is more important, wearing diapers or being with a partner you love.

I made that choice myself. I am alone for the reason of the last part of the quote. I do not regret it. I did give up my diapers and related paraphernalia at my wife's request. They were things I could live without. Losing my wife was many times more painful.

I have since started over again as far as material things are concerned. I do again enjoy dressing as I please and doing as I please. However there is a piece of my heart that is missing and there is a pain I always feel.

We all wish you the best of luck. Just know that we are here for support even after you try to quit.
With that being said, don't close a door, the initial will power to quit seems easy at first. Then it slowly starts to come back. It's not IF, but when. You can shrug it off for so long until you start resenting yourself and it becomes a mental thing. Remember to accept yourself as an AB/DL. Even if you're trying to quit. Don't put disgust towards it. You'll end up a mental mess.

I'm not saying it's impossible to quit, it's not going away completely. You will always be an AB/DL. Deal with it in a healthy way. If you get to the breaking point, wear, indulge, and try tapering off rather than cold turkey.

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It's a bad sign that the XYL is trying to change you to fit her beliefs or feelings rather than accepting you as you , good luck with that, we'll be here if you ever wanna come back. We will leave the light on for you.

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