Telling a friend

Hey everyone!
I really need some help here. So I'm bladder incontinent due to multiple kidney stones and want to tell my best friend that I need to wear diapers. I've been able to hide it for a long time but I think I would feel like the weight of the world would be lifted off my shoulders if I didn't need to hide it and try to cover it up ALL THE TIME. Any suggestions on how to bring it up in a casual conversation? Thanks for any help!!

I'd lead with the kidney stones first and hit on the problems it's caused etc

btw, what was it about the stones that led to IC? Had to have surgery?

Yes, I too would go with the medical information. Anyone would understand that and be accepting. If they weren't there would have to be something wrong with them.

Starting with the diagnosis is a good lead in, explain you have gone through the urologist tests and the best option for you was being diapered 24/7 to control your bladder issue. I have told a few people and they have all understood and it makes it way easier to deal with the issues of changing while out with the people who know.

It also takes a lot of stress away that they may find out by accident, and they won't question why you need a back pack with you when you visit the washroom.

When it is medical, and more so kidney stones, who can truly blame you, no one. Speaking of medical, by chance is one sign of kidney stones a piercing pain coming from the left side under the rib cage yet internal? I've had pain there for a couple months now. My mom and dad are unsure what it is and think it may just be muscle, but it is internal rather than external.

silentdreamer1996 said:

When it is medical, and more so kidney stones, who can truly blame you, no one. Speaking of medical, by chance is one sign of kidney stones a piercing pain coming from the left side under the rib cage yet internal? I've had pain there for a couple months now. My mom and dad are unsure what it is and think it may just be muscle, but it is internal rather than external.

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Yes, it could very well be a kidney stone. I have a small plastic bag with about 30 of them so call me the voice of experience. I once had an oblong stone lodged cockeyed in my urethra and had to fish it out with the large end of bent paper clip!

Not being a medical professional, I would not rule out another cause for this pain, however.

I should get my parents to get me an appointment to get checked out. Last time I was even examined (and that was for a physical) was back in 2014. I could also get checked to see if I truly have IBS-D.

Backing up a little...You have been diagnosed by a doctor and not self diagnosed? I had a kidney stone and the pain was excruciating. I wasn't ic when I had it but I was in a lot of pain and couldn't wait for it to come out. To my knowledge, most if not all stones can be removed. I'm surprised your doctor is letting you live with them without surgery or treatment.

But yes, IF it comes up, tell him you have stones. I wouldn't bring it up out of the blue, though.

zipperless said:

Backing up a little...You have been diagnosed by a doctor and not self diagnosed? I had a kidney stone and the pain was excruciating. I wasn't ic when I had it but I was in a lot of pain and couldn't wait for it to come out. To my knowledge, most if not all stones can be removed. I'm surprised your doctor is letting you live with them without surgery or treatment.

But yes, IF it comes up, tell him you have stones. I wouldn't bring it up out of the blue, though.

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Not all stones are very painful. I have passed some that I did not even know that I had, though my first, like yours, was excruciating. Some women claim that passing stones is worse than giving birth.

Zipper if you mean in relation to my case, I haven't seen a doctor in quite some time and my parents are hesitant to get me checked.

I'll never forget the first patient with stones I took to the Hospital, he was on the pram on his hands and knees and everyy bump the rig hit this guy howled in pain, it was probably the longest half hour of his life getting to the hospital.

silentdreamer1996 said:

Zipper if you mean in relation to my case, I haven't seen a doctor in quite some time and my parents are hesitant to get me checked.

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No I was referring to the OP. As for you, is the pain in the back? Mine started as back spasms that would last about 5 minutes then go away. I was also nauseous from time to time and it, too passed. Eventually I started bleeding when I peed and that was when I went to the doctor. Like Kenn, it was lodged in the urethra halfway between the kidney and the bladder. The doc thought some dilation medicine would help it pass, but it never did. I wound up with surgery at 23 where they used a flexible hook to go up and get it. I was unconscious of course. I still had pain and blood for awhile.

My dad had gallstones. His pain started as severe back pain. He thought he had a kidney stone, too. The doc in ER said there was no blood or sign of one. Then he asked my dad if the pain moved to the front of his chest. He said yes so they took another x-ray and found the gall stones. He had his gall bladder removed.

Recently I had groin pain for a month. I thought I had a bladder stone or a hernia. A CT scan turned up nothing. The doc said it was a strain and the pain eventually went away.

So there's a couple of possibilities.

No it is on the front left side, not the back. As for sharp pains, I do have almost daily occurrences where I tense up and suffer a sharp pain either right below the below the rib cage in the front, on my left side, or by the heart. I wonder if my urinary track is somewhat messed up due to the injuries i've sustained in the groin. Last one was a bowling ball landing on the jewels after slipping while bowling. Still producing gamete, but feeling and sensitivity are low (almost nonexistent) in that area.

I don't know what that is. Heart pain is in the rib cage area, dead center. Also, shortness of breath might be an issue. Could be a strain of some kind.

****Here is where a staff member says we're not doctors and you should see one.*****

A bowling ball on the gonads? Ow again!

I had syptoms like that ended being muscle torn from the ribs hurt like hell