I just need to know

Hello all, im posting this because i just nees to know something. I am a 21 yo male abdl and daddy. For a couple years ive, like the millions, have been in search of a daddy, but thats not why im here. You see, im pretty much in the same place since ive started.

I had actually found 2 daddy that i loved, and still do, but because of there struggles, and knowing how it is to be both daddy and baby, they are now both of my babies.

Now i have a mommy, and i love her, but ultimately i want a daddy more. And i feel like everytime i "find" one, that there a bot, or they want to be babied more.

I just wanna know if theres anybody out there thats going through what im going through.

Based on what I have seen here, finding mommies and daddies is difficult. Where all have you looked?

Do you look particularly for people who are in the AB/DL world? I would think that if you were looking in general for somebody who is just a Dominate type of person, that if they were open minded, they would be happy being your daddy, but I guess that is just what I suspect. Looking for a daddy within the AB/DL community, you are probably going to find mostly AB/DL's who either are also looking for a daddy, or AB/DL's who are willing to take turns being daddy (like you).

Are you kinda worn out from the idea of taking turns? It sounds to me like you are just stuck being the daddy the whole time. I would be upset with that too, although I would have a hard time being an actual caretaker, I don't know if I have it in me, so it is hard for me to relate. If you haven't let your little's know that you would like some time to be little too and be taken care of, maybe you should let them know, being friends or partners, is an act of give and take, and it sounds like you might have been doing all the giving, sometimes you need some attention too.

If you aren't able to deal with taking turns, then I think your best bet is to find somebody who likely doesn't want to be an Adult baby themselves, but likes being dominate, which wouldn't be uncommon outside the AB/DL community.

I'm not disagreeing with Tyger, but I think the person you're searching for has a real servant's heart ... he or she will enjoy caring for others. I think the dominant aspect becomes progressively less important when you're searching for someone who is a caregiver at heart. After more than 30 years as an AB, having had 15 babysitters and caregivers, I've come to believe that people who are willing to provide 'unusual' care are much easier to find than other ABs or DLs who have a dominant aspect to their personality.

sbmccue, that is exactly it, and for tyger, i dont take turns, because its hard for me to switch back and forth for my own leisure. like when one of mine wants to rp as the as a big, im ok with it. But even though they have offered to baby me, i just cant, because if i do i would get attached to it tooo fast and forget my role, which is how i lost my very first one, and ive done alot of growing since then. not to say if there already my mommy or daddy and want to be babied, i have no problem with that, just as long as they dont completely turn on me.

sbmccue said:

I'm not disagreeing with Tyger, but I think the person you're searching for has a real servant's heart ... he or she will enjoy caring for others. I think the dominant aspect becomes progressively less important when you're searching for someone who is a caregiver at heart. After more than 30 years as an AB, having had 15 babysitters and caregivers, I've come to believe that people who are willing to provide 'unusual' care are much easier to find than other ABs or DLs who have a dominant aspect to their personality.

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Yeah, I guess I can agree with that. I suppose it really could be either a dominant or a caring personality that would work.

Being both baby and mommy/daddy can be tough especially when your partner is also little and big. It is hard to find the balance of what works for you. Ultimately it does take a lot of sacrifice on both sides. I am not the best caregiver it has been something I had to learn to do and like. I am mainly little so the mommy thing does not come as naturally to me. I pretty much live one second away from little mode but I really have to prepare myself to be mommy each time.

It is hard to find someone but hang in there it will happen when you find the right person.

binkygirl said:

Being both baby and mommy/daddy can be tough especially when your partner is also little and big. It is hard to find the balance of what works for you. Ultimately it does take a lot of sacrifice on both sides. I am not the best caregiver it has been something I had to learn to do and like. I am mainly little so the mommy thing does not come as naturally to me. I pretty much live one second away from little mode but I really have to prepare myself to be mommy each time.

It is hard to find someone but hang in there it will happen when you find the right person.

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It really is something that takes time, and don't think the the perfect partner is going to make the balance perfect. When you don't try to make everything perfectly in balance, that's when you find it all evens out on its own. Don't be afraid to work at it and try new perspectives.