Back in a Binge Cycle

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Gardener

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  1. Diaper Lover
I've been kind of quiet here for several months. I occasionally check in, but maybe once or twice a week for the most part. This has corresponded to a practically non-existent interest in wearing. In the past, when I got to that point, I would hope my DL feelings were gone for good, and I threw all my stuff away. The only thing that satisfied my love of diapers was cloth with plastic pants and throwing them all away got to be a hassle when the urge would reappear. I finally came to accept that this would come back, so I have kept my limited stash in disinterested cycles. So I've been disinterested for a few months.

Well, as you all know, my DL urges have returned with a vengeance again. I have a couple days week when I have the house to myself as I only work part time, and I have never shared this with anyone including my wife of many years. For the last few of those days, I have taken up wearing and using again for several hours at a time. It feels great (as you all know).

There are frequently threads on here about peeing laying down. It took me a long time to be able to do it. But now, when I get up in the morning I don't use the toilet. Once the grand kids are off on the bus, I retrieve my stash and diaper up. Each time, after getting everything set, I lay on my bed and within minutes the flow starts. I'm able to start it and stop several times. I stay in the wet diaper and go about my daily business, and am able to have the flow start again several times in a couple hour period of time.

The main purpose of this is to assure those who struggle with this part of you is that it will not go away permanently and if you accept yourself, you can live with it and enjoy it as the desire returns. When it's not there, put it away for a while until it does. It is also possible to do this without sharing your fetish. I became a DL long before there was an Internet and didn't know there were others like me for many years. So I couldn't tell my wife as there wasn't any support group out there like this. Telling her now doesn't seem to me to be an option.

The other reason is to tell you that it takes practice to use them, especially peeing lying down, but once you are able to, it comes back rather quickly and is worth the effort it takes. Keep trying. There have been lots of good suggestions on here for getting it started.

Good luck!
 
I go through those "dry spells" as well, when I don't feel any urge to wear or use them at all. For some reason it does always come back. I have also hoped it would go away and stay away, but alas, it never does. It's good to know I'm not alone on this.

I have told my wife, however. She is accepting, but skeptic, I guess you could say. I'm still struggling with not being embarrassed about it around her. So, I understand about you not wanting to tell your spouse. I told her mainly so she didn't accidentally find them one day. It was just easier. But anyway, it's always good to know you're not alone.
 
Welcome back my old friend! I was wondering if you would ever come back. I'm in a bit of a purge cycle myself.
 
Great post! it's been a while since I've hit a binge and I'm on starting one, good to read the feelings come back naturally. Not hard getting back in the (diaper) saddle
 
Hey gardener,I got your message. Thanks a lot. I will try to keep in contact with you and join the Christians group.
 
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