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Thread: I need ideas for diaper play with a partner.

  1. #1

    Default I need ideas for diaper play with a partner.

    So if anyone's followed my post history closely, you'll know that an ever-evolving part of my life is my fiancee's involvement in diaper play with me. For anyone who could use a refresher, here's a brief history. When I first told her about ABDL she was a bit freaked out but still loved me. Over time she got more comfortable with it and we started talking about ways that we could play together. The long and short of it is that I went too fast and she wasn't ready and so she got super uncomfortable with it for the next few years. In the last few years though we've both matured a lot and pushed a lot of our boundaries and it's back on the table.

    What I need is help brainstorming ways she can get involved. For that there are a few limitations I'm working with. First, no ageplay. I'm not really into AB (more complex than that, but that suffices) so any play would be purely from the DL angle. So we're both adults and there's no caretaker role. Two, diapers are more for me rather than her. She said that she'd be ok wearing a diaper for me but I don't want to push that too hard. I don't want to end up making her uncomfortable, and I think there's plenty of territory to explore with just me being diapered when we have fun together.

    Let's also keep in mind that this forum operates at PG-13 level. So any suggestions for ways we can play together should keep that in mind. I want to keep in line of this site's rules of decorum. To be honest, I've kept considering posting this thread for the last six months and keep not doing so because I'm having a really, really hard time imagining ways to have straight diaper play that aren't sexual. That said, I figure there's no harm in posing the question anyway and just seeing what ideas you fine folk might have for me.

    We already have the basic me-in-diapers. She'll diaper me when I get in for the weekend or home from work. She'll change me whenever I need until the game has to end (eg, I need to go back to work). She also sometimes diapers me before we go out for a date- dinner, movie, etc- and changes me after we get back in.

    So... what else is there we can do? Ageplay being out- so no bottles, pacifiers, stuffed animals, mommying, etc- I feel like I'm at a loss for other ways to involve her in my diaperdness. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!

    And more geared toward the women of ADISC* I'd also like advice on what a good introductory diaper for her might be. I'm trying to identify a diaper that would be comfortable for her to wear, but the problem is keeping in mind that she's not a person for whom the thought of a giant diaper carries any appeal. I have no idea what constitutes "comfortable" in a diaper for a person who doesn't have any intrinsic attraction to diapers. Cloth-backed or plastic-backed? Bulky or unobtrusive? Pull-up style or tapes? Is there any particular "starter diaper" our female members might point me to? What do you use? What do you like about them? And just to reiterate, anything with babyish designs is out. Her enjoying diapers with me has been entirely predicated on putting mental separation between diapers and babies. I know that my kinks have a tendency to rub off on her when she's involved, so I'm trying hard to identify the best ways to introduce her to wearing diapers while minimizing the aforementioned things that would make her uncomfortable with doing so.

    On that note, I'd like to point out that while I have a gameplan for introducing her to diapers, I'm definitely open to suggestions on that too. I'm planning on just starting out by asking her to wear a diaper once in a while. Not use, just wear. When we're at home watching a movie or playing video games or something of that nature. From there we'll see where it goes. That said, what I'm really looking for is finding new ways to get her involved in me wearing diapers because that's where I feel to be at a loss.

    *Just to throw it out there, an annual "Women of ADISC" photoshoot would probably raise enough money to pay for this site's maintenance costs for a year. Merely a thought.

  2. #2


    Quote Originally Posted by AEsahaettr View Post
    *Just to throw it out there, an annual "Women of ADISC" photoshoot would probably raise enough money to pay for this site's maintenance costs for a year. Merely a thought.
    Oh yeah!

    For a starter diaper for your fiancée how about one of those Depends Silhouettes? They're thin like underwear and have a little bit of a pad.

    Diaper play? I'm at a loss. You already covered gaming. Unless you want to do children's games.

  3. #3


    You might want to get her to try the Always Discreet pull-ups. They're all white with a very subtle floral design and have slightly high cut sides like regular panties. Interesting thing is they're actually pretty good diapers (for a pull-up), they have standing leak guards and will take a couple of moderate sized wettings easily.

  4. #4


    Ok, here are my suggestions for some non-sexual playing:
    • Sleeping in diapers together
    • One of you can simulate incontinence or bedwetting and wait for the partner's reactions
    • Going out in diapers and having fun in daily life situations
    • Trying multiple types of diapers together - you can let her choose right diaper for her

  5. #5


    Quote Originally Posted by PadsnPullups View Post
    You might want to get her to try the Always Discreet pull-ups. They're all white with a very subtle floral design and have slightly high cut sides like regular panties. Interesting thing is they're actually pretty good diapers (for a pull-up), they have standing leak guards and will take a couple of moderate sized wettings easily.
    I second the motion! I'm a man, and I wear the Always Discreet pull-ups extremely often. They totally outperform every other redily-available store-bought pull-ups on the market in terms of fit/comfort, absorbency, and looks (and I'm very interested to see if the rumors of a men's/unisex offering are true). When I introduced ABDL to my girlfriend, this was what I started her out with, and she really likes them, and I think they look great on her!

    In regards to your other question, I wish I had some good ideas for you... trying my hardest to keep it PG-13 here... let's just say that with the Always Discreet pull-ups, the leg holes are stretchy enough that there is enough mobility of the front padding to allow access for a myriad of purposes...

    In my limited experience with partnered "play", we don't usually make the diapers a primary element of the activities. They're much more a part of the befores and afters. What I can say is that there is definitely a pleasant sensation for both when one partner wets while in contact with the more sensitive areas of the other partner. I advise taking time and working up to that in your particular circumstance.

    Being that you are also an AB-oriented DL, it might strike the wrong chord with you, but perhaps wearing/using as a part of a dom/sub roleplay (her "forcing" you to wear/use, etc.,) might help break her association between diaper stuff and baby stuff.

    I wish you the best of luck!

    (If this post violates ADISC guidelines, please please please let me know!)

  6. #6


    I will also give a thumbs up for the Always Discreet pull ups. I have tried them myself when I got some free samples. They were great for what they are designed for and more absorbent and comfortable than any Depends I have ever tried. I just would not use for overnight. I did give my wife one during "that time of the month" for some extra protection and she seemed to like it. Not that she enjoys or really condones wearing, but she is somewhat accepting, but the mood definitely changes often so no real way to ever know what might happen. Makes diaper times more a secretive thing that must be done quietly and without being noticed. This has likely been the result of less time with her on a sexual level. So just be careful. For me, a lot has to do with the blood pressure meds I was taking that had definite side affects with taking the urge away from intimacy. Now that I have discussed this with my doctor, we are trying other prescriptions. So I do stress, whatever you do, always keep her needs in mind when playing out your fantasies. If she begins to feel that you spend more time in "diaper me" mode and less in please her mode, you will ultimately turn her off.

    So with all that said, here are some fun things to do together. First off, chocolate dipped fruit seems to always be a hit. Strawberries dipped in chocolate can be the opening to a lot of romantic play time. Have her lie down naked. Feed her a dipped strawberry, slowly letting her take a bite. In between bites, slowly ease onto her, a pull up such as the Always mentioned above. With each bite, pull it up a bit higher. Make this last awhile, doing some caressing of her body with light, delicate touching of the extremities (or whatever you feel will turn her on without going too far). When she is completely padded it's now your turn. Let her tape you up into your favorite diaper, but she must now do this in between bites of the strawberries. Let her do as she pleases to you, that may drive you a bit nuts (That I can't say here, but she can be creative). When you are both done, you will either be relaxed in your new environment or so turned on, that the diapers will likely be secondary to what could happen next.

    For added fun, you can now turn this into a drinking game, beer, wine, juice, or whatever you both enjoy. The key here is to take shots of said beverage each time you cause the other to laugh. I enjoy the use of my tongue to tickle. Works like a charm and can lead to the obvious intimate sequences. But also, a lot of laughing, as you get creative and learn each others tickle points. The end result should be a lot of drinking. Did I mention, no bathroom breaks. Use what you got on and if alcohol is your choice, the likelihood of her partaking in the eventual release, will be much greater if a bit tipsy. I don't condone this all the time or consuming lots of alcohol (assuming all here of legal drinking age). But any beverage in quantity over time, will lead to the eventual intended outcome.

    All of the above can me interspersed with lots of hugging and close time while padded. Whatever you decide to try, do it slowly and always questioning her of this is OK. If you detect her discomfort, slow down and take a break. This is not a race. Treat it like a puzzle. Learn what each other likes, can tolerate comfortably, and adjust your actions in the direction that get both of you into a better place with each other. Be sure to let her plan a night that for fills her fantasy's as well. Be part of that and play along. Reciprocating with each other ultimately will open many doors and acceptance to each one's needs. Good luck and have fun.

    Hopefully this was PG-13 enough for here...

  7. #7


    I think Barnboy hit on some really good points and his suggested activities sound so fun that I might have to give them a try, too.

    I misread the original post the first time, so I apologize for the inaccuracy of my previous reply.

  8. #8

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