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Thread: Helping her remember

  1. #1

    Default Helping her remember

    Hey everyone. I've got a bit of a silly question and I'm hoping maybe someone here will have some wisdom that I hadn't considered yet. So my wife and I got married last fall and have known each other for 4 years. Up until we got married, it was a long term relationship however, so we only saw each other once a month or once every two months and only for a day or two at a time. We didn't always have "little time" because we literally just didn't have time for everything. I'm more of a lifestyle AB then fetish. It's not something we do for kink. we aren't a 24/7 MD/LB lifestyle, but at the same time we are. It's somewhat hard to explain. I can make my own decisions, I don't have a bedtime, or call her mommy all the time etc.

    I wear 24/7, for both #1 and #2. Sometimes I'll use the potty for #2 especially if she takes me to the bathroom to try, like when we're out and about where a dirty diaper would be very inconvenient. But anyway, sometimes she forgets that I'm little inside, and forgets to get my stuff at the store, forgets to feed me before she leaves for work, or forgets that I have a diaper on and probably need attention, along with some other stuff. Forgets is her word, not mine. Anyone have any idea how I can help her remember. I'm not trying to sound ungrateful or anything like that! I promise! I'm just trying to think how I can help her remember that I'm little inside all the time, even when we aren't engaging in exclusive "little time". Any ideas anyone?

  2. #2

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    Oh man. It sounds to me like you're looking a gift horse in the mouth here.

    I understand for you it's a lifestyle choice, but you need to grasp that it isn't the same for everyone. You're in a wonderful position where you have a partner who not only accepts, but participates in a lifestyle/fetish that most people would run from, but you aren't happy because she doesn't do enough?

    Be happy she does anything!

    What you're complaining about is minor stuff really. I understand how you WANT to be treated by her, but be realistic. Unless there's a physical need for her to feed or change you, it's not likely to be convenient all the time.

    There is the "A" in AB, which means adult. As an adult, however unwilling an adult you may be, you are an adult and still have to do things for yourself occasionally. It's called life! Don't risk ruining a relationship that many people would virtually kill for, just because she doesn't push it to the limit every chance she gets. Maybe reassess how much you expect, and be happy with what you have.

    Now I'm not just talking with no experience here. I've been in a newish relationship for a while now, and it has a definitive AB/DL side to it, and we are working on it. But I've always had an older little mindset, and she is more used to being younger and babied by a caretaker. Having or being a caretaker is something that hasn't interested me much before. But we are working on it. We both enjoy diapers and wetting, as well as little time. It's lovely to finally be able to express myself with her, but a lot of dreams/fantasies that I have had over the years seem a lot stranger in real life when actually participating in them with another person. I'm also learning that playing as a caretaker is pretty good now I've tried it.

    But whatever ups and downs we face, I'm so happy to finally wear and wet with someone, and she is happy that she has found someone who is not only not bothered by her IC issues, and actually helps her out, that we are just slowly working through our desires to see what clicks for us.

    I suggest you do the same. Be happy with what you have for now, and don't forget that she has needs to.

    Good luck.

  3. #3

    Default

    This is a tough one for sure. Maybe come up with a list for her of things that she would need to do before going to the store with you or going to bed, etc.? It sounds like maybe because of the lack of routine before, she just needs to build up a schedule/routine. Practice makes perfect for sure! I would start with a little list and as she runs through that list in the future and develops that rhythm it should become easier for you both. Best of luck and have fun!

  4. #4

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    Hey wombat! I appreciate the response. I really didn't mean to come across as a whiner or as if I was taking things for granted but perhaps I did. I certainly hear what you're saying. And you're right in a lot of ways for sure. I am very blessed, and certainly didn't want to come across as a whiner, especially when I know there are lots of people in this community who would kill just for someone to love them for who they are. So I'm sorry if I came across that way. I don't view it as a problem or anything, I was more so looking for insight maybe from people who might have been in the same boat on how they dealt with getting into a rhythm if you will. I guess it's just a matter of time and communication. I really do my best to make sure I keep her needs in mind too, both physical and emotional. But thank you again for providing some perspective .

    Shibapawz thank you as well. I certainly don't want to feel like a chore, but I guess with time and practice and repetition comes rhythm. I guess I just need to learn patience.

  5. #5

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    The best I can suggest is to act out a bit more babyish when you need the attention. I certainly wouldn't suggest this for almost anyone else, but since you're this far in your age play and your relationship, you can probably get away with it. I sometimes act little in front of my wife when I need the attention. Sometimes she gives it to me and sometimes she just rolls her eyes. Life is like that.

  6. #6

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    In the past I read some tuff written by a caretaker. She required of her little boy that he be formal and ask for help. "Mommy, could you please change my wet diaper?" And afterward, "Thank you, Mommy, for changing my wet diaper."
    An interesting dynamic. He was little, but she was not having to push the role. She could be ignoring him, then step in when he needed her. It may be a little too much for your situation, but it's a thought.
    As Wombat indicates, she is made of gold. Treat her so.

  7. #7

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    I'm gonna agree with Dogboy, probably just act more babyish. Maybe you can start sucking your thumb and tug on her shirt a little to get her attention. She sounds like an absolute gem, I hope you do everything you can to make her day every day.

  8. #8

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    congrats on what you currently have. As far as getting her to remember, I'd assume as others said, just patterns of habit.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by wheelman21 View Post
    Hey wombat! I appreciate the response. I really didn't mean to come across as a whiner or as if I was taking things for granted but perhaps I did. I certainly hear what you're saying. And you're right in a lot of ways for sure. I am very blessed, and certainly didn't want to come across as a whiner, especially when I know there are lots of people in this community who would kill just for someone to love them for who they are. So I'm sorry if I came across that way. I don't view it as a problem or anything, I was more so looking for insight maybe from people who might have been in the same boat on how they dealt with getting into a rhythm if you will. I guess it's just a matter of time and communication. I really do my best to make sure I keep her needs in mind too, both physical and emotional. But thank you again for providing some perspective .

    Shibapawz thank you as well. I certainly don't want to feel like a chore, but I guess with time and practice and repetition comes rhythm. I guess I just need to learn patience.
    Thanks for the considered reply wheelman. I'm so glad that you didn't take my response the wrong way.

    I do get where you're coming from, and do sympathise. I was just hoping that you weren't thinking of making too many waves in a situation where you have a willing partner! I guess I was stressing on you to compromise at all costs lol! It sounds like you got a handle on it now, and good luck to you, I hope it works out.

    I have to say, part of the reason that your post struck such a chord with me, is the fact I'm going through a kinda/similar/sorta/not really, situation like yours myself.

    I don't want to get into trouble by "promoting" my own thread, but I have a thread going about my current situation dealing with an open age play relationship and my personal issues. I'd love you to read it and provide some feedback from your perspective, as another person dealing with somewhat unique issues.

    Whatever though, I hope it works for you dude!

  10. #10

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    You could sit down and talk to her and that would be my advice to you but it is possible the she does not have time to all the stuff that you want her to do. Something simple as communication could help a lot.

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