I want to go to the next level but what is it?

I have been so much happier since I allowed myself to live as the adult baby that part of me has been wanting me to do for decades. I've been wearing diapers full time for 6 months at the end of April. I've been using a pacifier when in bed for several months too. I use a CPAP machine and a regular Nuk 5 fits into my mask very nicely. I've been using a round pacifier from the main AB company in the UK. I have baby food and formula which I've consumed from time to time but not for a while. I want to start consuming it on a more regular basis. A friend of mine who doesn't understand the AB lifestyle at all but knows some of the things that I do told me that l'll probably lose control of my bowel next. I came back into the lifestyle after many years because I became urinary incontinent. I find fecal incontinence rather disgusting. Is it a necessary step in my return to being a baby? I forgotten to mention that I have tons of diapers both disposable and cloth. I really like the sleeper that I got from Baby Pants. Does anyone know why they put the label of their shortalls on the outside. Is it just to make peoplr uncomfortable to wearvthem outside. I really wish that I had a mommy so that I could be a total baby at times and have someone to experience the lifestyle with but who wants to be amommy to a man who's 54 going on 2? Sorry for no paragraphs in this message and that there are probably spelling and grammar mistakes but I've been drinking and I typed all this on my phone. One more thing befors i go. I've never really considered myself a sissy although the other vhildren did when i was in public schol. However, well looking at the various AB items on Etsy, a site that's kind of like eBay, and seeing the sissyvitems including dresses, part of me really wants. Them. I've spent so much money on things that one or another part of me wants but I'd be willing to buy sissy items including dresses if I felt that I'd really wear them. I have bought frilly bibs and bonnets but haven't worn them much. Well there's a lot of my thoughts here and I would appreciate any thoughts. I hope that there are others who share some of these thoughts with me.

How should I interpret the fact that over 120 people read this message but nobody responded. I had a reasonably long message written and I pressed the wron button and it disappeared. I'm too tired to write it all over again. I'll just say that if I've annoyed everybody and so nobody wants to comment on what I post. I get the message and I'll leave I don't stay where I'm not wanted. I basically bore my soul here and nobody comments.

BabyDavie2 said:

How should I interpret the fact that over 120 people read this message but nobody responded. I had a reasonably long message written and I pressed the wron button and it disappeared. I'm too tired to write it all over again. I'll just say that if I've annoyed everybody and so nobody wants to comment on what I post. I get the message and I'll leave I don't stay where I'm not wanted. I basically bore my soul here and nobody comments.

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I wouldn't really interpret it as much, sometimes threads just don't get a response for a while, every so often the AB forum sees a dry spell of comments. As well, as you said at first, it isn't broken into paragraphs which can be helpful to get people to read everything, especially if they are just quickly browsing.

I think you might find it hard to get comments on your question as well, because there are not a lot of AB's that have found a mommy, so they are just as curious on how to do it as you are. I think Kif hit it on the head though, I think you just have to meet people in real life.

Your hope for a mommy is probably what the next level would be, but if it was me, I'd still be happy just to find somebody that likes my little side, whether they want to also be my mommy or not.

What else do you suspect that the next level might be? I think wearing 24/7 is great, and being surrounded by adult baby stuff all of the time is great, but there is also a certain element of adulthood that is also nice to stay a part of.

Davie, I thought about how I wanted to respond, and that took me a day! A lot of us are laggards.

You and I are about the same age. I've been an "active" AB since about 25, and I think there are a number of levels one goes through. The first is obviously experimentation. None of this comes naturally to a fully-functioning adult; just learning what you like and don't like can take some time. For example, it took me a couple of years to develop a preference for cloth diapers over disposables.

The second level, to my mind, involves active participation. Active participation doesn't necessarily involve someone else; it simply means you become accustomed to spending some time as an adult baby. Becoming an "authentic" AB requires some time spent in unlearning some pretty powerful conditioning. All of us remember how difficult it was to wet a diaper for the first time as an adult. Regression places some constraints on us that we do not expect ... I have a pretty solid work ethic, and it took me years to learn how to play again without feeling guilty about it.

The third level, I think, involves someone else. Some ABs may be quite content to stay at Level 2 for their entire adult lives, and that's fine. My goal, however, was always to find a willing babysitter, nanny or mommy type. I've always dreamed about having a woman taking care of me; to me, that's what defines a baby. As it turns out, that opportunity came about for me again in recent months; while I had a purely functional mommy-type caring for me for about 20 years, we eventually went our separate ways and I thought I'd never come across someone else who could fill that role.

Well, I was wrong. A lady came to work for me who is probably the most maternal woman I've ever met, and, after getting to know her over a period of many months, I told her about my infantilism and asked her if she'd try babysitting me. She is absolutely terrific ... and while every other woman I've had care for me has done so because we were in a relationship or because I was paying her, this lady (who is somewhat older than me, incidentally) absolutely loves big babysitting. Nothing fazes her ... and having her care for me makes me feel genuinely "free" and finally able to relax and unwind. I look forward now to the times when she cares for me; I'm not sure there's a happiness level beyond that for an AB.

My point is this: None of this happens by accident. You have to be involved in a friendship or other relationship with someone you trust, and they have to have a maternal instinct that will help them over the challenges of caring for an adult as a child. All of us are still learning, since we've likely forgotten how a "real" baby acts and feels. I think it's quite natural to be in the situation you're in, and whether you've plateaued or decide to move to another level is entirely up to you. Being an AB is a journey rather than a destination; that's something the rest of the world doesn't understand, and it's something many of us tend to forget from time to time.

well there is nothing you can do to quote "go to the net level" you dont have to do what you dont want there is no this is how an abdl must live its personal to what you want u would say try new things for example maby go to a few events or try diapers you have not and if you dont want to mess yourself you dont have to but if you try it and enjoy it then feel free

Thank you, everybody for your input. I'm not feeling very well right now but I plan on responding to each of you personally on this thread.

I just posted this message and noticed that even though it's my 21st post, my name is still in blue. Can anyone tell me what's going on, please. :-(