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Thread: Why are we AB/DL?

  1. #1

    Default Why are we AB/DL?

    Hi everyone!

    I try to understand why i'm an AB and I try to remember all my history...
    I think that it could be because of my difficult childhood with my parents?
    Do we have that in common?

    Thanx for your help...

  2. #2

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    Hey there ghost. Well that's the big question....who really knows. As for my childhood, I reckon I did have it difficult, not bad or abusive or anything like that, but I'm thinking that there may have been enough of something to introduce a sense of insecurity into my mind. Still that's surely only part of the equation because as you'll discover from others here, everyone's experience of childhood differs. There are some commonalities like bed wetting etc. All I can say for sure is that I've always felt these tendencies as long as I can remember.

  3. #3

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    It's a very difficult question. I personally have no memories of having a difficult childhood. Moreover, my interest in diapers started at a very young age, 3 or 4 years old and has stayed with me consistently for the rest of my life. I've always thought it might have been related to potty training too early and missing something that I had enjoyed.

  4. #4

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    While I understand why this question comes up so frequently, I think it's mostly a waste of time and energy. The formation of drives like this come from early life and I think it's very difficult to know with any certainly why one person likes them and another doesn't, even after similar experiences. What's interesting is how little time most of us spend analyzing why we like the foods we do, or books, movies, or music. There is little social cost even to liking most undesirable things of that nature. If the stakes weren't so high, I don't think most of us would worry about the origins of this, either.

    What we do with it seems to me to be much more important than where it comes from. To do that positively requires self-acceptance and a sense of proportion. Focus your energy and attention where it will do you the most good.

  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by Trevor View Post
    While I understand why this question comes up so frequently, I think it's mostly a waste of time and energy. The formation of drives like this come from early life and I think it's very difficult to know with any certainly why one person likes them and another doesn't, even after similar experiences. What's interesting is how little time most of us spend analyzing why we like the foods we do, or books, movies, or music. There is little social cost even to liking most undesirable things of that nature. If the stakes weren't so high, I don't think most of us would worry about the origins of this, either.

    What we do with it seems to me to be much more important than where it comes from. To do that positively requires self-acceptance and a sense of proportion. Focus your energy and attention where it will do you the most good.
    It gets asked multiple times and never gets answered. It is actually healthy to do some research. But there is very limited research on fetishes in general, and expect the conclusion to converge on "no one knows" for the time being.

    Maybe one day they may invent the "vanilla pill" for those of us who want out of this lifestyle. Would I take it? Let me think about that one ..... Nah!

  6. #6

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    I think there is value in understanding our past. If we get a grip on how we got this way, we may even be able to achieve healing.
    I was pushed to grow up too fast. If not properly behaved in public, I was beaten. If I wet the bed as a toddler, I was beaten and given a cold shower. My collection of plushies was taken from me without warning at age 5 or 6. Bedwetting came and went for the next 8 years or so, but without the punishment, just the teasing from my siblings.
    I have memory flashes that indicate early sexual abuse. I have been trying to open up and deal with it.
    All of this together probably makes me the child I am. I have not yet achieved the healing I seek. Maybe someday I will.

  7. #7

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    I just am. I am through justifying why I am. I just believe some people are wired to be this way because lot of people have had bad childhoods or were forced to grow up too fast, were bullied, etc. and they don't grow up to be one of us.

  8. #8

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    I see this question a lot. I wonder if other fetish people say why do i like feet or why am i into bondage. Once your comfortable in your own skin just be happy.

  9. #9

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    I'm waiting for someone to use that "other fetish jar was empty" gig.

  10. #10

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    No one really knows why it happens. Everyone has their own experiences. I have an idea as to why I got into diapers, but everyone has a different story.

    I had bedwetting problems up until I was about 16-17. The entire time, I had to use a plastic sheet, which is by far the worst thing you could ever put a child who suffers from bedwetting through. They're loud, so they tell everyone who sits on your bed what you are and what you do; they constantly slide off your bed, so anyone who sits on them is going to eventually wind up on the floor and your sheet is going to be visible for everyone to see; and they don't keep the blankets, or you, dry at all. Plastic sheets are a curse, more-so than bedwetting is. The entire time I had to deal with it, I was ridiculed by my brother, and my mother and father would sometimes get irate and upset by it. Since this was an every night thing, I had to either deal with my father being upset, or my brother being a jerk and mocking me over it. Not only this, but it prevented me from staying at friends' houses. Friends stayed at my house, but I stayed up all night until early in the morning, otherwise there was no stopping an accident.

    Wasn't fun. Was not enjoyable in the slightest. I discovered diapers around the age of 10, and would sometimes go out on my own to buy a pack of Pampers and wear those at night. It saved my bedsheets from getting wet, and it saved me humiliation. The thing is, I can't really say that the bedwetting and discovery of diapers at the age of 10 led to me being an ABDL, as I had thoughts about wearing diapers when I was very young, around 5 and 6, maybe even earlier, who knows?

    I'd bet that it's almost impossible to come to a full understanding.

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