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Thread: Advise on coming out to my partners friend

  1. #1

    Default Advise on coming out to my partners friend

    Hi i looking for some advise,

    Myself and my partner are moving house, and we got a spare room. So my partner is thinking of renting to his friend (a couple).

    My partner knows i am DL, and he not happy about that, i can wear by myself as long as it doesn't get in his way, which i am fine about, he not interested and wanting to play at all.

    These days i less bothered about wearing in public and out, although i don't do it that often, i mostly wear around the house.

    Should i try to hide it (part of me doesn't care) and another part of me is thinking about my partner, will it make him feel worse if his friend know.

    I am only out to my partner.. I feel i should talk to my partner about this but he & myself find it hard to talk about DL subject. I don't think he really understands it and i can't explain myself very well to him.

  2. #2


    If your partner isn't comfortable with your DLness, then it is not unreasonable to assume his friends won't be either. I wouldn't bring it up unless it becomes an issue for them ie tons of smelly diaper trash strewn all over the house. Keep clean, keep discrete and it shouldn't be an issue. Treat them like you would treat your partner in regards to your wearing, only don't tell them. If it were another kink, say BDSM or grizzly bears on unicycles, you wouldn't tell them about that. So don't feel compelled to tell them about your DL. If it becomes an issue be straight with them about it. There are a lot of other good posts about similar concerns and how to approach them in other threads. Check them out. They should provide some good insight into how to handle the situation should it arise.

  3. #3


    Are you on board with having roommates? I think it's unfair of him to expect you to hide something that you are used to doing around the house. I think you and your partner need to sit down and talk about this and he needs to be made to understand that it's not fair for you to have to closet yourself. The fact that he is not very supportive of your being DL is going to be an issue because he doesn't see the appeal and will not understand why you need to wear.

    This could end badly if you don't stand your ground.

  4. #4


    I think its really something you need to talk to your partner about first, i know he may not be all for it but at the same time he wouldnt want to make it hugely awkward between all of you!

    Best of luck

  5. #5


    Thanks for you advise, i think i will talk to my partner, i don't want to stop wearing but there is a difference between leaving smelly diapers around the house and wearing under clothes, i guess i will just wear under clothes and if his friends bring them up i will deal with it.

    Regarding the having flat mates, i prefer not to (as it nice to walk around house naked etc, not that i really do it, but it is nice to be able to) Last time i flatted with a "friend" not a great friend, she wanted to share dinners all the time, it got to the point of being really annoying, getting text messages with "what time will you be home" etc was not good. Maybe that is why i don't speak to her any more

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