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Thread: Introducing infantilism to my mom; not going well

  1. #1

    Exclamation Introducing infantilism to my mom; not going well

    I still live with my mom and a few weeks ago (while I was away on vacation) I sent her a very kind and descriptive email that explained the details and main points of what infantilism is and how I need it in my life. I had sources and links and I was very kind and I haven't bothered her about it at all. It seems like she is going backwards now; she is getting more frustrated and showing more resentment towards the entire subject. It makes me feel scared and alone... I just want her to accept and leave me alone with it.

    For my entire life I have been pushed to the side and put on the "back burner". I've been alone in so many things and it seems like no matter what I do I just can't do things correctly. For a few years I was suicidal and she had no clue... I did self-harm just to keep myself from going off the deep edge. I just couldn't take it and I don't want to have to take it anymore!

    What should I do? How can I approach her about this in a way that I won't get hurt? Is there anything I can do? I'm so lost in my feelings and my life and everything... I just at a loss as to what I should do. I'm not giving up, but I am so close...

  2. #2

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    I see you have IC checked if you are that would be were to start. If you are a bed wetter start there. Some of what you said about yourself is my story to. A loner, pushed a side, nothing is good enough. Been in that same boat. Even the self destruct. You may even try having her read some the post on this site. On how people have struggled with their feelings. Trying to explain this to other is always hard. Good luck and don't give up. There is always some here that will lend an ear. Most of us have been through some the same things.

  3. #3
    skyfoxpup

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    Hi man you have guts a lot from the sound of it. If told two of my best friends never any of my family (thay think I'm crazy ad it is.) I would like to offer some advice go slowly small things like how diapers make you feel secure. For example them slowly switch to another part of it. Remember small steps.

  4. #4

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    Hi Sam:
    Sorry you are having a rough time right now.

    I'm sorry to say that some people won't accept this side of a person, no matter how hard they try. I don't know your mom, so I can't say that she is one. Maybe if you just don't push it on her right now. Give her some more time to digest what you have told her.

    In the mean time, maybe keeping it to yourself and doing your ABDL activities in private, may help the situation.

    I hope everything works out for you. Please take care of yourself and let us know how things are going.

  5. #5

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    This is why I believe that it is better to have these kinds of conversations face to face, rather than leaving a message. However, the genie is out of the bottle and one can go back and change that which has already happened. I also agree that you need to let this soak in and give your mom some time to digest it.

    I've also come to the conclusion that when giving this kind of information, starting with just a little information is better, as was said by 11hinzvic. Since you showed that you are incontinent, you could have told her that you actually enjoyed wearing diapers as they gave you some sense of peace and comfort. If the subject comes up again, you might retreat to that point.

    Most parents don't accept this for their children, though I've seen exceptions on this site. Your mom may come around, but until then, I'd let it drop. Usually, this is something we live with without sharing it with our parents. Finding a partner who accepts it is a much better accomplishment.

  6. #6

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    For a while, after my mom found out, I got this impression of 'where have I failed as a parent' from her for quite a while.. she has grown to acceptance of this over the years, though not much time is devoted to that subject.

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by AlphaWolfSam
    I still live with my mom and a few weeks ago (while I was away on vacation) I sent her a very kind and descriptive email that explained the details and main points of what infantilism is and how I need it in my life. I had sources and links and I was very kind and I haven't bothered her about it at all. It seems like she is going backwards now; she is getting more frustrated and showing more resentment towards the entire subject. It makes me feel scared and alone... I just want her to accept and leave me alone with it.
    I haven't seen you on the site before, so welcome to ADISC!

    Unfortunately, this is often the reason why we give the advice of not coming out to parents (especially when you still live with them). As it seems, you haven't gained much of anything but more needless stress out of the matter. It's a point I try to hammer home to others here that have inclinations of doing so, to never do so passively through e-mails, texts, or the like. One must be active in the conversation and frame it in a way that suits their position. This often has some better success in the long run.

    I don't know your reasons about why you need infantilism through public action at home, but you have to realistically accept your mom is not going to accept this aspect. She will, in fact merely, tolerate it. And getting to that point is going to be a long journey which I don't think is going to reap the benefits you hope for whilst living at home.



    For my entire life I have been pushed to the side and put on the "back burner". I've been alone in so many things and it seems like no matter what I do I just can't do things correctly. For a few years I was suicidal and she had no clue... I did self-harm just to keep myself from going off the deep edge. I just couldn't take it and I don't want to have to take it anymore!
    This may be a possible reason why you are turning to infantile desires...and that's merely a band aid to some deeper problems I'm going to wager. Odds are you may still be miserable even after. I implore you very strongly to seek professional counseling right away in this matter.



    What should I do? How can I approach her about this in a way that I won't get hurt? Is there anything I can do? I'm so lost in my feelings and my life and everything... I just at a loss as to what I should do. I'm not giving up, but I am so close...
    There are lot of things you can do, and do keep a positive, but also realistic attitude in this entire venture. You're situation will get better. I don't think though going to your mom about this is going to be helpful, and it's not going to get the thing you need. You're just going to get more stressed out and frustrated. First you need to work on yourself and learn some tools on how to do so. Please see a professional counselor especially since depression and self-harm has played a role here. They can help you sort out these issues and help you talk to your mom.

    You need to take charge though and set it up. That is the first step I advise. If you saw one before but it didn't help, you need to find another and try again. Therapists can be like diapers, it may take a few before finding that one that fits just right.

    Any other questions, do ask.

    And Remember,

    You are not alone.

  8. #8

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    This is another reason why I would only tell on a need to know basis... My wife and that is it. Although she did share it with her best friend but she has never said anything to me or treated me any different.

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